Keeping DD off school due to period

[Girlymum26]

My DD is 10 years old and is in year 5 at school and just started her period for the first time on Sunday evening this week and she came and told me as soon as she noticed.

We have had plenty of chats about it and she’s had the lessons in school so knows all about it and why she had them and even about changing pads and she seemed to take it in her stride, although a little bit embarrassed.

I was at work on Monday and Tuesday this week and my husband made her go to school as he does the drop of these days and said it’s “just a period” and that she couldn’t stay off school for it. I had no say in it as start work at 6am.

She’s leaked both Monday and Tuesday and she said she’s really sore where her pads have been rubbing her skin and leaking and her tummy hurts so I’ve kept her off today as it’s my day off.

Ive given her some calpol, some sudocreme for her sore rash and ordered some of the lil-lets teen pads which are more narrow so shouldn’t rub anymore and got some period pants too to protect against any leaks. We are just having a quiet girly day to help her get to grips with it all but I’ve explained she will need to go to school tomorrow and Friday.

I’ve called school and explained why she wasn’t in and they were really sympathetic and her teacher called me back and has said she can go to toilet during lessons if she wants to change her pad as it was turns out she was too embarrassed to change it when anyone else was in the bathroom at the same time and that is she’s going to struggle with PE this week they won’t make her do it.

Husband is not happy I’ve kept her off and said I’m making a rod for my own back even though I’ve explained it’s just for today, to help her out a bit.

AIBU to have kept her off do you think?

He gets a say when he gets his first period.

Don’t be hysterical, it was ONE day off. It will have zero effect on her education. Being listened to and cared for,
on the other hand, will have left a positive impact. Besides which, the husband didn’t consult with his wife when he unilaterally decided she would be going to school, did he?

This thread got me thinking how desperately unfair it is that girls are starting their periods earlier and earlier - I was 13 but at 10 she is still a little girl. We females were certainly dealt a dud hand when it comes to bodily functions. I hope your DD comes to terms with her lot easily and give your DH a good talking to!!

I started ages 10 and couldn't participate in swimming (this was in the 90s).. as I used sanitary pads. At that age wasnt comfortable with the idea of tampons (in fact I didn't start using tampons till adulthood).

Obviously there is now I assume period swimwear but understandable when that was an issue you'd miss our on some PE

10 years old! 😮😮😮

Yes, keep her off school and give support.
My Gran started at 17, Mother at 15 and myself
at 14 (and half).
I just didn't know girls that young can start their cycle.

Sadly they can. Mother Nature can be quite the bitch. I was 10 when I started and I wasn’t the first of my friends to start.

Aw her big brother just brought a tear to my eye.

Absolutely great decision to let her have a day or two to get to grips with things. I have had horrendous periods. I can remember strongly my mum being supportive. I can remember strongly school teachers who weren’t (I passed out with pain on a couple of occasions). Her Dad should take care for being remembered as supportive!

Oh piss off! Your own suffering doesn't mean young girls today have to.

This with bells on.

Well piss off in return then - at my school having a period wasn't an excuse not to go to PE and PE was far from my favourite subject at school. The school wouldn't have allowed it - they didn't let us not go to PE even if we were in pain or bleeding heavily.

Get her period pants ! So comfortable. No leaks and no rubbing. Take the stress out of periods for her.
modi bodi and wuka do tween and teen sizes.
I wear their adult sizes and absolutely love them.

Odd that it's only my posts that are getting picked out - when there were more than one person on here saying that they think the OPs daughter should have gone to school today. I simply asked a question. Nothing more than that

Came here to say this. I hope you stand up to him OP for your daughter's sake. What a massive twat. It's made me really angry for your daughter. Poor girl being shoved in school on her first period when she's still primary age. She should have had the first few days at home getting used to it. Tell him to come back and give his opinion when he's had his first period.

I assume you are old enough to understand the world has moved on from ice cold showers and an environment where young girls suffered a loss of complete autonomy.

Therefore, is it a stretch to imagine that these days we have compassion for our girls, especially 10 year olds starting their periods.

Your posting style is projection. Keep it to yourself when it comes to 10 year olds in 2026

Hard agree. Disappointing the dad of a girl is behaving this way.

I didn't have ice cold showers at my high school - but thanks for pompously telling me that I did - are you the mumsnet police? It's really not up to you to police what I can and can't post - if you don't care for my posts - do yourself a favour - and ignore them..

If you also think girls and women in the UK have autonomy in 2026 - perhaps you need to have a rethink. Many do not for various reasons.

I used to get excused from PE, which drew more attention to me unfortunately. But I would (and still do) pass out of I excercise during my menstrual cycle. Vomit and pass out.

The teacher was offering to excuse from PE if needs be. That's a nice courtesy.

Well I love your son and his Dad needs some education.
Hopefully your DD will have "easy" periods. If she doesn't I would expect her Dad to go to "period boot camp".
My Dad lived away from home when mine started and really struggled when he came home and I had menstrual psychosis (I mean that was fairly harsh for all involved). I went on the pill at 15 for management then he of course jumped to me having sex (did not happen until I was 19).
Honestly, how do we make men understand? (It's a lost cause)

Oh your poor daughter! Year 5 is so young and it probably feels like a very adult thing for her to deal with. I think you should keep her off school as she needs to adjust to this. Your husband has no clue about it though and the last thing your daughter needs is to feel even more uncomfortable

Yes, please do give a ten-year-old child on her first period a super-plus tampon and a towel and make her get on with it.. who cares if there’s a leak in front of everyone, at that age? These things happen. Probably the silly tiny white PE shorts to deal with too.

Have some compassion!! I thought nightmare PE teachers were a thing of the past.

Yanbu and you sound like a lovely mum who has her daughter’s back. Your husband can sod off!

Did you miss the part where the OP said her daughter is 10? I very much doubt that anyone is able to properly advocate for themselves at 10 , especially as she is probably the first in her peer group to be experiencing this.

As for your husband OP, I'd have punched his lights out before telling him that since he has no uterus, he has no right to have an opinion and in future he must defer to you on all period related topics.

And your son sounds like an absolute treasure. Obviously takes after his mum more than his dad!

I often think that children today are mollycoddled into ineptitude. In this case, not at all. She’s 10! It’s painful, can be embarrassing and difficult to manage until you learn your own cycle. She knows none of that yet. I’m ancient and I still hate dealing with it. You did the right thing and your DH needs to back off.