Keeping DD off school due to period

[Girlymum26]

My DD is 10 years old and is in year 5 at school and just started her period for the first time on Sunday evening this week and she came and told me as soon as she noticed.

We have had plenty of chats about it and she’s had the lessons in school so knows all about it and why she had them and even about changing pads and she seemed to take it in her stride, although a little bit embarrassed.

I was at work on Monday and Tuesday this week and my husband made her go to school as he does the drop of these days and said it’s “just a period” and that she couldn’t stay off school for it. I had no say in it as start work at 6am.

She’s leaked both Monday and Tuesday and she said she’s really sore where her pads have been rubbing her skin and leaking and her tummy hurts so I’ve kept her off today as it’s my day off.

Ive given her some calpol, some sudocreme for her sore rash and ordered some of the lil-lets teen pads which are more narrow so shouldn’t rub anymore and got some period pants too to protect against any leaks. We are just having a quiet girly day to help her get to grips with it all but I’ve explained she will need to go to school tomorrow and Friday.

I’ve called school and explained why she wasn’t in and they were really sympathetic and her teacher called me back and has said she can go to toilet during lessons if she wants to change her pad as it was turns out she was too embarrassed to change it when anyone else was in the bathroom at the same time and that is she’s going to struggle with PE this week they won’t make her do it.

Husband is not happy I’ve kept her off and said I’m making a rod for my own back even though I’ve explained it’s just for today, to help her out a bit.

AIBU to have kept her off do you think?

He never tried asking.

He dismissed the problem outright and carried on.

He dismissed it with derision, not an apology that he couldn't take a day off work at short notice and a promise that if she really needed to come home he would report a family medical emergency requiring his attention.

If you have 'been through hell online' then your current posting style is doing you no favours. Perhaps dial things down a little and you are less likely to be confronted over your overly hostile approach.

I can't be bothered with groups of people going in on one another and screaming at other people -handing their arse as someone put it. I said nothing more than why couldn't she do PE and I wasn't offensive about it

Online bullying -that crossed over to my offline life -got me to the point that my mum thought she was going to lose me. I spent 15 months of my life in complete terror. I had to leave work -thankfully it was a poorly paid zero hours job

I had 8 months of therapy -because I was so broken. Packages being sent to my home. Photos of my house going online -and they did it to several others -who got nowhere with police. You think some nasty comments on here are going to bother me compared to that. The be kind gang as I live and breathe

You don't know what's going on in someone's life when they post on here. I last had to see police 6 weeks ago

Arse handed to me by a bunch of people on here? Good for you. Hope you very much enjoyed

There are people on here calling the husband a vile misogynist and saying she should withhold sex -go cheer them on eh.

Again. I really have nothing to say to you. There were several people on here that said similar to me and I was the only person that got my arse handed to me as someone put it -you also don't need to put what I said in inverted commas. I had to see police 7 times in a year.

And lastly. I'll be dialing nothing down -certainly not for some people who take offence to anything -because of course the OPs husband has to be a vile misogynist and she has to with hold sex.

I asked a simple question and I got hung out to dry for it. Because obviously you aren't allowed to ask why someone shouldn't do PE if they have their period

Perhaps mind your own business.

I mean there's a queue of people calling me out but apparently the husband is vile and a misogynist and doesn't deserve sex and should issue a grovelling apology ? And thats okay?

Maybe he had to go to work and couldn't take a day off because his wife was working too-but he's the worst person in the world.
Ok.

It really does seem that you can't have a slightly different opinion -or

Arse handed to you

For those arguing on my post, seriously get a grip 🙄

To those who have actually offered useful advice and help, thank you.

I had a word with husband on Wednesday evening about his wording “just a period”. I had to remind him about the time he had to take me to A&E as I was bleeding so heavily from my period that I fainted and smacked my head on the floor and was so anaemic my BP was in my boots. Luckily for me a uterine ablation has sorted things out but I really worry she will struggle too.

I also that just because it’s her first one doesn’t mean she won’t be struggling, and the fact she’s so young is exactly why she’s struggling and just generally needed some love and care.

He then went up and spoke to our daughter, apologised if he came across as mean and asked if she needed anything. She said no but told him she was sore and her tummy hurt and that’s why she was off school.

He’s been told in no uncertain terms that if she says she needs to be off for it then she needs to be off. She loves school so I cant see her using it as an excuse to stay off either.

No more arguing from me. Wish you all the very best.

Take care. All the very best going forward xxx

Just seen this thread on Facebook -seen a few threads this week crossing over from here to there. Can't link it as I'm on my phone

Night all

Yes I have. However I must have missed a bit where OP suggested this is what's currently happening with her daughter so I am not exactly sure why you are bringing this up.