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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To tell my manager I won’t share a room with colleague again?

334 replies

Worktripissue · 01/03/2026 15:55

Some background here - my role requires regular travel around the UK as the company has various sites. For about 3 nights each month I stay away in a specific location; up until 2024 I always had my own room, a change was then made for financial reasons that I’d need to share with the colleague travelling with me who does the same role.

No issues at all, we got along and she was respectful and we’ve remained friends post her leaving the company recently.

I travelled with her replacement last week, and we shared a room as per process.

Firstly, she jokingly (I thought) said before we left that she is a snorer. She’s not wrong, even with ear plugs I was struggling to get an uninterrupted nights sleep. By her own admission she is a larger lady and she says even her own husband gets on at her. She honestly snored like a man.

Next issue - we have a £30 per night meal allowance. On one of the nights, I visited my cousin who lives in the area and she cooked for me, so I had no reason to use my allowance.

My colleague asked me if she could use it when I got back to the room (about 9pm at this point). Now she’d already had dinner and the restaurant was closed. She said she only wanted it for a soft drink so I said no problem. She then came back up to the room and said they were still doing room service. 20 minutes later the door goes and hot food arrives which she proceeds to eat on her bed, and the smell lingered all night.

A couple of other minor annoyances in terms of time spent in the bathroom and loud phone calls with her husband which she could have taken outside the room/in reception.

She is polite in general, but that was our first trip and I don’t think I could handle monthly stays with her.

AIBU to tell my manager I won’t share with her again?

OP posts:
Catlover77 · 01/03/2026 15:56

No, you are not being unreasonable

Uticary · 01/03/2026 15:56

I cannot believe that you ever agreed to share a room with anyone.
Honestly.

Paraguay · 01/03/2026 15:57

Uticary · 01/03/2026 15:56

I cannot believe that you ever agreed to share a room with anyone.
Honestly.

This

BlueMum16 · 01/03/2026 15:57

Uticary · 01/03/2026 15:56

I cannot believe that you ever agreed to share a room with anyone.
Honestly.

This.

It's unacceptable for your employer to have asked.

Worktripissue · 01/03/2026 15:59

BlueMum16 · 01/03/2026 15:57

This.

It's unacceptable for your employer to have asked.

I think it’s because there was a big restructuring at the time with multiple redundancies so they were making a big thing about costs and not wasting money where possible. It was never an issue because my ex colleague and I were so friendly.

OP posts:
traveltraveltravel78 · 01/03/2026 16:01

I hit you are being unreasonable as I scrolled down- no I don't think you are being unreasonable! I can't believe you have to share? I'd kick up a massive fuss over that.

Hatty65 · 01/03/2026 16:02

It would be a brave or foolhardy employer that asked me to share a bedroom with a work colleague.

It's utterly inappropriate. I would refuse to go unless I got my own room.

MikeRafone · 01/03/2026 16:03

It's not appropriate to be sharing a bedroom, especially if they are then keeping you up all night.

Delatron · 01/03/2026 16:03

YANBU - it’s an issue now and they should not enforce this. Tell them you won’t be sharing with any colleagues in future.

Legoninjago1 · 01/03/2026 16:03

I would never share a bedroom with a work colleague on a work trip. Oh my goodness no. Yanbu!

ThirdStorm · 01/03/2026 16:03

If your company can’t afford travel, then they shouldn’t require you to travel. Well done for trying but please insist on your own room going forward. And don’t share your allowance again.

QuickBrown · 01/03/2026 16:05

If you go in with all those reasons it sounds a bit moany. Stuck with just the snoring.

7238SM · 01/03/2026 16:07

I've never had to share a bedroom with a colleague- utterly ridiculous. I'd be making it clear that you won't be sharing with ANYONE in future, not just this woman.

toomuchfaff · 01/03/2026 16:09

I wouldnt ever share a room with a colleague. EVER. I wont even share rooms with friends of I can avoid it.

YANBU.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 01/03/2026 16:10

Don't think that any comment upon her size or bathroom visit duration was necessary, really.

You could pay the difference yourself?

TheDaysAreGettingLongerAtLast · 01/03/2026 16:11

I would never share a hotel room with a colleague so the company can save money - it's not reasonable.

One company I worked for stopped paying for taxis from the airport to the hotel when employees had to travel abroad. I still took the taxi and expensed it as it was not safe late at night to wander around train stations or walk from one to the hotel as a lone female.
They still reimbursed me.

HurlyWhurly · 01/03/2026 16:11

If the company had recruited a man to the other role they would be paying for a separate room so the budget must hv the ability to be flex'd...

CarlaLemarchant · 01/03/2026 16:11

The room sharing is the issue not your colleague. Without making any reference to your colleague individually, you need to challenge this policy as outdated and inappropriate.

janietreemore · 01/03/2026 16:13

Could you first agree some ground rules about sharing the room? You may be doing things to annoy her too. Eg, no hot food in the room, and no phone calls longer than 5 minutes except in emergency. If she can't do anything about her snoring and you can't improve your ear protection or move the beds away from each or whatever, you may need to warn her that you'll be asking for a single room in future.

LlynTegid · 01/03/2026 16:18

You were unreasonable to agree to it to begin with. What is done is done though, you must be 100% clear and be prepared to say you will not travel if you are asked or expected to again.

I would have been in support if the Employment Rights Act that went through Parliament had included a clause saying that an employer must provide a room for single use if travelling for work.

Rightsraptor · 01/03/2026 16:19

The trouble is you accepted room sharing when this new policy (which I think is totally outrageous btw) came in because you liked that particular colleague. 'Start as you mean to go on' springs to mind. Now it's tricky to get out of it because it does revolve around personal stuff, like snoring etc.

As someone else said, if you travelled with a male colleague they'd have to book two rooms.

Wherewithout · 01/03/2026 16:19

There is no way on earth I would ever agree to travel for work if I was expected to share a room! That’s inappropriate no matter how well
you get on with your colleagues and I’m shocked that your company would
even ask.

AgnesMcDoo · 01/03/2026 16:20

You shouldn’t be expected to share with anyone.

i wouldn’t agree to that at all

tinyspiny · 01/03/2026 16:22

I wouldn’t have been sharing in the first place , I cannot see in what universe a company would think this is reasonable .

7238SM · 01/03/2026 16:23

I mean a youth hostel room with 12 dorm beds would be even cheaper for the company! Its wrong to expect adults to share at all. Bonkers.