So, how is it actually possible for our adult kids to ever move out of home?

[cateringday]

I’m imagining it’s the same for a lot of people.
two kids 20 and 18, they both actually have £10000 in the bank as an inheritance but can’t see how they would ever get enough for a deposit or pay a mortgage. If they rent then all that money will be gone anyway.

how old are kids leaving home these days

we live in the south east

I also live in the South East. I moved out at 18 for uni and rented, then back in with my parents at 24 whilst I was in law school, then purchased a flat with my partner at 26. I received a similar amount as your children as an inheritance but the majority of the deposit came from his savings. We're both lucky to be fairly high earners, DP in particular.

My siblings both moved out at around 30 but didn't have partners to purchase with.

I am a family solicitor and the majority of the divorcing couples I work with seem to have children in their early - mid 20s still living at home. I think it is really difficult to move out as a young adult, particularly in the South East.

Are they working? DP and I always worked, whilst at uni and afterwards, which we needed for our rent.

I’m south east.

I downsized at least partially to give my two a house deposit.

DD1 graduated four years ago and came home to us.
she’s 25 and is hoping to have enough next year when she’s 26/27.
though she says she would be able to buy somewhere if she were in a long term relationship far quicker.
that’s the reality for her.
She’s hopeful that if she’s not in a relationship by that point her sister will have graduated so she’ll have a lodger.
TBH it’s not easy to have an adult child living at home but with a bit of give and take we make it work.

the only thing for us is having to postpone our golden years’ but it’s a small sacrifice to pay.

they might get an inheritance from my mum in the next 18 months so that will obviously help.
that money would have ordinarily come to me but DH & I agree that it would make the most difference to their lives and future.

I think you are meaning "how can our adult children ever afford to buy their own house" rather than moving out? Adult children can rent, either on their own or with a partner, or go into house shares.

I think the answer is that unless they have substantial family help and two good salaries, and the ability to save up ruthlessly, then they can't. Unfortunately I don't think the UK is set up to support a bigger proportion of long term renters.

You don't need a mortgage to leave home! We all started out renting a grotty room, or mouldy flat - it's not that difficult, and it gives you precious independence.
I also know plenty of still- young people who have moved out of the parental home, rented for a bit, and then bought.

Yes, it's not always easy, but it's perfectly possible.

I know a few families in London who have sold the family home and then bought multiple houses somewhere else so they can all live nearby.

Also know siblings who have bought homes together.

If you work together as a family you have options.

Get a job and rent somewhere to live? It's not that complicated surely.

If they are currently living at home and working, they should have absolutely no problem saving up enough money for a deposit for a rental property. If they can't afford to rent a whole flat, they houseshare. It's pretty normal!

I find it very odd that the expectation should be that a young person has to buy a house to move out from home. If renting means it takes longer to be able to afford to buy a house, so be it. Why anyone would put their adult life on hold by living with their parents for years/decades just so they can afford their own house is beyond me. Your own house is not a prerequisite for a happy, fulfilled adult life - but independence is.

I think it might be really area specific now? Three of my kids have bought houses, two of them bought in York (which is quite pricey), one in Malton. Two have partners, one bought solo. They were renting and saving money at the same time and I have no idea how they did it, but they did - no family help here, I'm poor as fuck.

No family help here, one bought with partner in the south after renting. Another bought solo after living at home helping her to save, she bought in the north. Both were home owners in their 20s.

Hopefully you mean their 10k is invested somewhere as opposed to sitting in a bank account? LISA might be worth investigating. They have a foundation, they need to concentrate getting a deposit together.

Mine went to Uni and now work and rent. They are saving towards a house deposit and don’t quite earn enough for a substantial mortgage as yet. We will (and have!) help them out when that time comes.
One is in the SE and the other has settled in the North.

One child has their own child and saved and paid for the majority of his wedding. Pays for full time nursery fees, also in the SE. So I expect he’ll be on the property ladder in the next 5-10 years. He’s late 20’s now.

It is possible to move out. Just not necessarily to buy a property in your early twenties, which was easier in the past. We still rented for quite a few years in our 20’s though too- way back in the 90’s!

I think a lot of young people expect to go from living at home and straight to buying and they skip the house sharing stage that most of us middle aged people did. I didn't buy for many years after having moved out from home and I moved between rentals 11 times until I got a mortgage for the first time. I think it's a shame, the flat sharing stage taught me so much and I wouldn't have wanted to be without it.

@Miranda65 the sort of grotty house share I lived in does sort of still exist but is much harder to access and infinitely more expensive. I remember I bought Loot and had my pick of shitty rooms in falling-apart houses with a never-seen landlord. I found one in zone 3 for £25 a week, and there was a communal space so we actually watched TV together, it was fun.

Ds has moved out and is living in a house share in London so he’s done it. It’s costing him £1200 a month (including bills tbf) so it’s only really possible because he is being paid 50% more than the average national wage.

A lot of cheaper rooms would only look at people 25 and over, and they needed references and all sorts. So I suppose it gets a little easier at 25?

There’s also no real communal space - what would have been the TV room in my time is what ds is living in. So it’s more like a boarding house, ds doesn’t get to know his housemates at the same speed. Though they also wouldn’t watch tv together - I suppose they might game together.

Are they still in education?

My kids left the south-east.

But echoing what others have said, leaving home and living independently are not the same as buying somewhere to live.

Both of mine went into house-shares, then the oldest bought a tiny flat that needed shedloads of work, and learned how to do most of it. He bought a house in his mid-30s with a partner, a lot of it funded by his sweat equity on the flat.

The oldest bought in his late 30s, when he married, and they moved to a more affordable part of the country.

Both of my DS moved out at 18 into rented. Youngest is 25 and still renting. Eldest is 27 and bought a house 4yrs ago. He saved like crazy.

The new reality is that London and anywhere easily commutable to London is going to be out of reach for anyone who doesn't have family money to help them.

They get a job and move into a house share, like everyone did / does. Then they shouldn't need to touch the 10k and can keep adding to it.

30 years ago when I moved out I wasn’t/couldn’t dream of getting a mortgage at that age.

Couldn’t even afford rent on a studio, but could afford to house share, where we were all quite skint, but we were together so you didn’t notice as much. And had a wonderful time just being young, carefree-ish, healthy, and enjoyed my 20s dancing, having listened to weekends, parklife.

i think trapping yourself into a mortgage so young when you might not have worked out who you are or where you want to be could be risky and expensive.

You work, earn some money, spend far too much on rent and lower your living standard expectations and enjoy the freedom of not living with your parents. And worry about the future at a later point.

Move out or buy a house? I sometimes find lot of young adults seem to expect to move out of the family home and have the same standard of living. Would they consider renting a studio apartment/bedsit/house share/lodging?

I live in the South East and fully understand how expensive it is. I was desperate to move out and had a few years in bedsits/studios with minimal furniture and boring food, which was hard after leaving my parents' big, beautiful, 4 bed house, but it was worth it for the freedom.

For me it was a combination of living at home and saving for a deposit, partner in similar situation and the chance to move to a cheaper part of the country. I don't think I'd have been able to move out by myself in the same area as my parents much before 40 just from saving up though.

Even grotty rooms cost a fortune.
It's diabolical out there.
Box room price is 700 pcm plus utilities here.

They'll have to share. Which used to be common, I had four flatmates at one point, another time I had two, but it was a two bedroom house and we used the living room as a bedroom. I had to work all through university and eat a lot of brown rice. I didn't have a phone for the first year and had to use a public phone.

Which is to say, you look at what you can afford and make it work.

Since there are two of them, maybe they could rent together - siblings could easily share a room too so take a one bedroom, if they are the same sex.