18 year old dd will not let me attend A-level parents' evening

[18yearoldhell]

Since starting sixth form, dd has become more teenagery than she ever was at 14 years old.
Rude, entitled, ungrateful and demand-avoidant. Was never any issues before and couldn't believe how we had sailed through her early teenage years.

Parents' evening email came round. She is year 13. The expectation is that the student books the appointments for the parent (there is no other option).

DD is point blank refusing to do so. Says she's 18, an adult and it is pointless.

AIBU to expect to go to her parents' evening? She thinks I am utterly ridiculous and 'no one' elses' parents will be going and most teachers aren't evening doing appointments (yeah right).

Interested how other parents would play this.

I think once they are in sixth form that's up to them isn't it? My DS went into an apprenticeship after GCSE and I wasn't told a single thing about his progress and he was expected to navigate everything himself from deciding what % of his earnings to put t into a pension when he didn't even know what a pension was. They have to grow up sometime. A 6th form teachers meeting is essentially a work appraisal for someone not in work. She is old enough to be told how she is performing and what she needs to do to improve without her parent there.

Well that’s great that she’s an adult but in my opinion, the one who pays decides. I’d call the school for advice and take it from there. I’d also have a word with her about how the world works; you can’t be a total pain in the …. and still expect things like car insurance to be paid for. I’d insist on good attendance, good or at a minimum, decent grades and respectful behaviour towards everyone around her.

It is actually.

I taught 6th form for very many years and was a 6th form tutor. All the 6th form came to parent’s evening as did parents or guardians.
OP as others have said, I would email the form teacher and head of 6th form. Explain and ask them to make appointments for you. They should be able to do this. I’m not sure about not releasing info to parents once the student is 18. It may have been in the parental contract but fo us it was never even mentioned as an issue.

Did you teach before GPDR? Schools shouldn't be releasing information to parents without students permission if the student is over 18.

No, we were extremely careful re GPDR, may well have been in parental contact which students and parents had to sign. No one ever queried it to the best of my knowledge.

I don't think it's possible that ALL the sixth forms I've taught in over the last 15 years have been breaking the law. Although perhaps students aren't aware they can refuse to have information released, or don't exercise the right very often. I don't think the vast majority of students would mind parents knowing how they were doing, anyway!

This absolutely. I’m an ex teacher and we used to feel frustrated when you weren’t able to speak to parents of pupils of whom you had concerns and were grateful when the parent took the initiative and contacted school so appointments could be arranged, hopefully with the child in question in attendance.Year 13 is crucial. Good luck.

Well how often did parents turn up without students once they were 18? I bet it didn't happen often but if it did and the school released information about the student then they did break GPDR rules. They could have received huge fines if the student complained.

Here is a summary of the law pertaining to this area. I imagine the student & parent contract signed at the beginning of sixth form covers it. Otherwise there would be daft, impractical situations like schools being able to send out report data for only part of year 13.

Access to information - childlawadvice.org.uk https://share.google/9ZfVsNrRyzSzZ30yx

The legal summary I just posted suggests that would only be the case if the student hadn't consented for their data to be shared with parents (e.g. in a sixth form contract) and/or if they had actively instructed school not to share data e.g. if there is an estranged parent or something like that.

Even when they are over 18? That would be like your employer giving all this information to your mother

The contract is void once student turns 18

As far a schools are concerned we absolutely can discuss students progress with parents, even when they’re 18. So they can and will make an appointment or talk to you on the phone if you contact them. And we do have to get parental consent for all manner of trips and things that seem ridiculous when you consider they are actual adults in every other organisation with which they come into contact! Schools have to regard young people as children for far longer than the rest of society . For example teachers can be prosecuted for having a sexual relationship with someone over 16 whereas in the ‘real’ world that is not illegal (even if immoral )

That relates to parents of children though, not adult students. My DCs school gave reports to the students in the year 13 rather than directly to parents.

But at 18the student can withdraw permission. Strangely the schools don't let them know this though

There is no law stating that 18 year olds are still children if they are at school. They have the same rights with regard to data protection as those who have left. They are even allowed to vote.

Thanks, been retired a few years so simply can’t remember. Curious now so might ask an ex colleague what we did about. How difficult for the parents.

I do know someone who withdrew permission.

So you are saying the over 18 pupils have no rights to their own data not being spread to parents? I don't think that's correct. Continuing to do so because the pupil hasn't withdrawn consent most probably. However if they did withdraw the consent then school might find themselves in a different position

i came here to say the same thing. She can pay for her own car insurance, too, and anything else you cover. FAFO!

All the parents for my yr13s turned up with their son/daughter for Parents Evening appts with me tonight.

Yes, my son turned 18 last month and I got the message yesterday saying he missed football training.

Because he hasn't withdrawn consent obviously. Seems a strange thing to message about though

Its because he is enrolled in that lesson. He really doesn't care about consent. Tells me if he isn't going into college and for what reason and if I'll get a message or not. Still asks if he can skip lesson for whatever reason. Lol. Its just the way we flow. He knows the consequences if he messes up.