Embarrassed myself at friends wedding.

[SimpleSingle]

I went to a friends wedding a month ago. Had too much to drink, and fell asleep in the toilets. I was found by one of the bridesmaids who helped me to my room. The next day, everyone was joking about it.

I am mortified. I have 3 children and im 40 years old. I feel so much shame for getting myself in this state. It keeps popping into my head and I feel that awful feeling in the pit of my stomach! What an embarrassment I am.

I don’t really know what I’m hoping to get out of this post, but I am alone with my thoughts and feeling awful about this whole thing. I socialise with this extended group every 6 months or so, and I’ll be seeing them again soon, and I just don’t want to go. My friends parents all know etc. Will I ever not feel so awful about this???

What do you think is behind such a strong reaction that's still going strong a month later? Of course it wasn't your finest hour, but you're human, so what was it that's making you feel so ashamed?

Whats behind it is feeling like a failure and an embarrassment to my children. What sort of a mother does that???

If you can't fall asleep drunk at a wedding...
I think you are overthinking this and assuming people will think you are a bad mother as a result, which is not the case. We all do silly things, especially when drunk and around people we trust.

I don’t think this a big deal at all! With three kids a nap in the loo would be blissful. And if that’s the worst you did while drunk, well. A big old nothing.

I get that you’ll be embarrassed if they bring it up. Can you train yourself to expect it before you see them? Practice a few pithy replies. And then style it out.

‘A few drinks and a nap, yep that made it a perfect wedding for me!’

’Honestly Janet you’re getting boring keep bringing it up now, it’s sending me to sleep, might have to have another snooze in the loo’

Falling asleep in the loos is far preferable to ‘twerking’ on the dance floor and making a pass at the groom…or bride.
Believe me we’ve all done far worse!

There are far worse things you could have done than fell asleep in the loos. No one got hurt, it's fine, file it away in your brain and move on.

Falling asleep in the loos isn't bad, I thought you were going to say that you were sexually inappropriate with the guests/groom. You could have stripped naked on the dance floor or anything mad like that but you didn't. You just fell asleep in the toilets.

In the grand scheme of things, it's not a big deal and be kind to yourself.

Falling asleep in the loos isn't bad, I thought you were going to say that you were sexually inappropriate with the guests/groom. You could have stripped naked on the dance floor or anything mad like that but you didn't. You just fell asleep in the toilets.

In the grand scheme of things, it's not a big deal and be kind to yourself.

I don’t even think that’s embarrassing, certainly not the sort of wedding story people would be talking about a month later.

I mean think of Victoria Beckham 😂

This is not something to be ashamed of. Do go to the next meet up - make a joke about it yourself - when you pop to the loo, tell them you're just off for forty winks. Honestly, it's nothing.

Getting your tits out and throwing up everywhere would be an issue

falling to sleep at a wedding you’ve not said you did anything outrageous it’s nothing more than a story for a bit of amusement your overthinking

the main thing is own it
long day drinking over a long period with limited food

Unless your friends have never done anything remotely embarrassing then I'm pretty sure they'll have forgotten about it now.

I know that feeling though, it will pass x

I think if anyone even remembers you fell asleep, they will think it's amusing.
People are more inclined to remember their own social mistakes rather than anyone elses...unless they are really spectacular, and your's really isn't.

Nobody apart from you will still be thinking about this a month on.

If you want to read about really bad behaviour go find the recent wedding thread!

Is that it!?! I know first cousins who got drunk and slept together, falling asleep on the loo is nothing!

Oh and being a Mother does not mean you have to be a Saint.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5487964-to-ask-for-examples-of-the-worst-behaviour-youve-seen-from-an-adult-at-a-wedding?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=app_share

Christ I fall asleep everywhere, I am such a poor sleeper that food and alcohol and I’m zonked!

You are over thinking this. People are finding it funny rather than being judgemental.

You've obviously never been to an Irish wedding in Ireland then?

I have, and believe me falling asleep in the toilets is nothing. Over there, if you can't get drunk and go a bit doo lally at a wedding there's no hope for ya! (if you're a drinker that is..)

However, I noticed that "what goes on tour stays on tour" so no post mortems or embarrassing comments etc. next day. Everyone is in the same boat.

I'm Irish BTW.

I would make it into a joke - got to get my naps in where I can! Type thing.

Unclench!

This isn't a massive deal. It's common for people to drink too much at weddings because the booze is often free flowing and people's drinks get topped up so they don't realise how much they've had to drink. It's probably more common for Mum's who are out of practice (because they don't go drinking regularly) to overindulge and get too drunk too quickly. Please don't feel embarrassed. No one is going to judge you for letting your hair down.

Just own it!
You fell asleep in a toilet! You could have really embarrassed yourself doing other things.
My SIL did this at my big birthday party as she was very tired and drunk! No one cared.

I PROMISE you, it’s really not that bad. I find that as I get older (I'm in my 40’s) the paranoia/blues following alcohol consumption can last for weeks. I think this is what you are experiencing because falling asleep in the toilets is honestly the least crazy thing one can do when drunk. And like others have said, no one else is going to be thinking about it apart from you. In a few more weeks you won’t care. Try and stop dwelling on it, every time it pops into your head just go and do something to distract you (read a news article, make a drink etc).

were your children there? If they weren’t , don’t worry, you’re only human

I mean, I think it’s a bit disingenuous to suggest we wouldn’t all feel a bit self-conscious about being found drunk-dozing in the loos, but it’s no cause for self-flagellation. Style it out, op. Don’t be embarrassed, just laugh it off - it’ll be a funny story for the grandchildren etc!