Embarrassed myself at friends wedding.

[SimpleSingle]

I went to a friends wedding a month ago. Had too much to drink, and fell asleep in the toilets. I was found by one of the bridesmaids who helped me to my room. The next day, everyone was joking about it.

I am mortified. I have 3 children and im 40 years old. I feel so much shame for getting myself in this state. It keeps popping into my head and I feel that awful feeling in the pit of my stomach! What an embarrassment I am.

I don’t really know what I’m hoping to get out of this post, but I am alone with my thoughts and feeling awful about this whole thing. I socialise with this extended group every 6 months or so, and I’ll be seeing them again soon, and I just don’t want to go. My friends parents all know etc. Will I ever not feel so awful about this???

Please be kind to yourself. It really wasn't that bad. Things like this make a wedding. Nobody is ever perfect! 😊

Fuck me, I’m glad you aren’t in my group of friends 🤣

This is definitely something we’d all be laughing about weeks later. Including the toilet napper!!

@SimpleSingle
There's nothing worse than "Beer Fear" when you feel you've embarrassed yourself.

You need to give yourself a break, I'll bet they've seen worse 😉

You need to style it out.

Anyone brings it up:
You "Ha Ha, yes, one too many, I do love a good snooze though Ha Ha"
Or
"Ha Ha, I must have been reliving my youth, thats a lesson learnt, note to self, I'm not 20 anymore" (big grin)

I've embarrassed myself a couple of times, I always think it's embarrassing in the moment but eventually it just turns into a funny story.
"Remember the time at that wedding when I had one too many and fell asleep on the loo and the bridesmaid helped me to bed"😂😂

Seriously, give yourself a break, laugh at the situation and hopefully, if your friends are good people, they'll laugh along with you ❤️

I used to love a drunk nap on the toilet at the club 🤣 it's not that bad ,OP. You could've done much worse

The best thing you can do is laugh it off and learn from experience.

I can't handle my drink very well, wine and shots are the worst.

Some people love to be with friends who become loud and boisterous when drunk. I have a colleague who falls over every time and always has crazy drunk stories to tell and people laugh hearing all about it and laughing with her

If that’s the only time it’s happened you’re doing better than lots of us. I’ve had plenty of messy moments and me and my friends just laugh them off and keep them as fun stories.

No shame, no judgment and if your friends are mean about it then they’re not people I’d want in my life.

You let loose a bit too much, you haven’t hurt anyone and it definitely doesn’t make you a bad mother. Parents are still allowed a life and some fun.

Yeah but if they repeatedly did it, for a one off minor offense I wouldn't consider them a friend (someone i like to spend time with)

If you’re not used to drinking then it’s understandable that you would overindulge. Your children were safe, IYou were not parenting at the wedding.

your friends are probably being hypocritical, how many of them have never been drunk?

It happens, if your friends are your friends they will be fine about it. I’d break the ice when you meet up just saying something like “so I promise not to fall asleep in the toilets this time folks, what am I like ey?” And they will probably all reassure you that it was fine, have a bit of a giggle and move on. If you do it again, then they might have a reason to be a bit arsey but this is not something you do on the regular then it’s just a bit of a silly story, no harm done. People do much worse things when drunk!

Yeah this is me tbf. Not often but I like the odd blow out with my mates. We’re probably due one. 😄

How would you view someone else who’d done what you did OP? I’m guessing you would think it was mildly amusing and think no more of it? If so why are you giving yourself such a hard time?

This is a brilliant wedding story. And well done for quitting while you were ahead, even if you didn’t quite make it to bed.

It could have been so much worse. Coming on to someone, stripping, blurting out someone's private information, even hurting yourself, and more. I've seen all this happen on nights out when someone drinks too much.

There was a thread here a few months ago where the op stopped getting invited to her friends' weddings because she kept making a fool of herself repeatedly, so was losing her friends. Now that would be something to work on. Not falling asleep.

Just apologise to the bride and move on hun . I got married in the summer and some people fit a bit drunk and I’m still drinks with everyone and all is ok . Don’t overthink it

There’s not many people who haven’t been there!! My and my Friends went to a day time musical festival a few years ago was 1pm - 10pm at 6pm my friends had to call my husband to come and collect me. I woke up in bed at 3am, no clue how i got there etc I was ripped by my friends for weeks! We the went away for the weekend my friend had too much to drink and went flying down the street, grazed all her knees - she then got ripped for weeks!!

if you can’t laugh at yourself/along with your friends about times like this then I would get more fun friends

I threw up in the men's urinals and fell asleep in a flower bed at my cousins wedding. That was about 25 years ago and no one has mentioned it since it was laughed about the next morning at breakfast 🤷🏽‍♀️ My family are Irish though so its not anything more than an amusing anecdote 😆

Unless you were the bride, it's fine. Just make a joke about it, but if friends continue to joke about it when you are uncomfortable then reconsider your friendships - it's really not that big a deal.

My two bridesmaids both fell out with their BFs and I was the one to make sure they were ok (v drunk, staggering etc and crying) and had to book them extra rooms etc.

One of DHs friends got kicked out for an argument. Honestly don't worry about it.

Sounds like a boring wedding if the most exciting gossip was you falling asleep in the toilets 🤪

ps I’ve done this (maybeeee more than once) oops!!

Don't worry about it OP, we've all been there and even if your friends give you some ribbing, style it out. Laugh it off too and make a joke out of it. It will become old news and someone else will do a daft act and everyone will forget. My SIL did something similar last summer and it was mentioned once, we all joked what a light weight she is and now it's done.

This!

I'd also have a few good light come backs if anyone mentioned it

I was reading that expecting something awful to happen when you woke up. It's a bit embarrassing but not a big deal. Sounds like you were tired and a bit drunk. Laugh it off, they'll soon forget as it's not that interesting. You didn't do any harm, I think I've seen worse at most weddings.

At least you didn’t get into a fight or tell someone you’ve always hated them. It’s quite sweet falling asleep. It could’ve been so much worse.

Same, I used to drink to get drunk in my teens and 20s and then would be appear drunk, get louder and then next day I’d just feel so cringey. And I’m not someone who can hide how drunk I am, my friends seemed to be able to be drunk without swaying and acting that different. I stopped drinking to get drunk in my late 20s and I wish I had had that realisation years before.

So I deffo get that embarrassed feeling once you’ve sobered up because I was always a messy drunk. But your friends will just see it as a funny story, if you can laugh at yourself then you’ll feel better for it. It was one night, hardly a moral failing and with some distance I’m sure you’ll just roll your eyes at the memory, but until the stop being so hard on yourself and if your friends keep going on about it, after laughing it off just say ok that’s enough, you’ve had your fun move on

I understand feeling self conscious about it, but you're thinking about this way too much and way more than anyone else will. You can either try to laugh it off or if you must, and someone mentions it, you can say 'Honestly I feel so embarrassed about it' and they'll assure you it's not a big deal. As people have said, falling asleep in the loos is not the end of the world - it's not making a spectacle of yourself. If you don't have a reputation for heavy drinking I imagine that, while people might have made a joke of it, because that's what people do, most would just assume you were very tired. But please don't avoid people because of it.