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Original poster

Embarrassed myself at friends wedding.

205 replies

SimpleSingle · 22/02/2026 11:55

I went to a friends wedding a month ago. Had too much to drink, and fell asleep in the toilets. I was found by one of the bridesmaids who helped me to my room. The next day, everyone was joking about it.

I am mortified. I have 3 children and im 40 years old. I feel so much shame for getting myself in this state. It keeps popping into my head and I feel that awful feeling in the pit of my stomach! What an embarrassment I am.

I don’t really know what I’m hoping to get out of this post, but I am alone with my thoughts and feeling awful about this whole thing. I socialise with this extended group every 6 months or so, and I’ll be seeing them again soon, and I just don’t want to go. My friends parents all know etc. Will I ever not feel so awful about this???

OP posts:
outerspacepotato · 22/02/2026 15:42

You're 40 and your body isn't processing alcohol as well as it used to. You passed out from drinking.

If you're embarrassed by things you're doing under the influence, maybe it's time to moderate how much alcohol you drink.

Namechangerage · 22/02/2026 15:43

Fake it until you make it. Pretend like it’s no big deal and you’re surprised they are still remembering / talking about it. “Oh yes I don’t go out much any more. It was a big one wasn’t it” don’t apologise.

It will blow over

Namechangerage · 22/02/2026 15:44

outerspacepotato · 22/02/2026 15:42

You're 40 and your body isn't processing alcohol as well as it used to. You passed out from drinking.

If you're embarrassed by things you're doing under the influence, maybe it's time to moderate how much alcohol you drink.

Ok but that’s not the point of the thread is it? It’s happened now, I’m sure she will be more careful next time. Why not respond to her actual question?

Namechangerage · 22/02/2026 15:45

SimpleSingle · 22/02/2026 11:58

Whats behind it is feeling like a failure and an embarrassment to my children. What sort of a mother does that???

please stop catastrophising! You know it wasn’t the best way to behave. You also had 3 kids and probably aren’t used to nights out being a good mother and all. So give yourself a break!

Summatoruvva · 22/02/2026 15:46

Oh it could have been so so much worse! I'd find it funny if my friend did that and wouldn't think any less of her.
Be kind to yourself I am assuming there was a partner there to help with the kids.

Frugalgal · 22/02/2026 15:47

Itsthesameeveryday · 22/02/2026 15:39

Oh god this is nothing!! I was expecting worse OP.

Look at it this way, had you not fallen asleep on the loo, what awful things might you have been up to on the dance floor?? 🤣 Blessing in disguise.

I didn't fall to sleep at a wedding and did the awful things on the dancefloor!! 😳🤭

Nothing too horrendous, danced all by myself on the completely empty dancefloor watched by the assembled guests and did mad flirting with the wedding band singer. I was 40ish at the time and the bride was a child of a work colleague 😬

I'd certainly have taken falling asleep in the loos over that anyday !!

Don't give it another thought OP, in the unlikely event anyone sees fit to comment just say you're not used to drinking..

MyLittleNest · 22/02/2026 15:49

I wouldn't be so hard on yourself, OP. It's not like you caused a scene. You just quietly fell asleep in your own little corner. It's a party and most people there probably over-served themselves. You didn't do anything to disrupt anything, so really, I think it's okay. If people are talking about it, it's more a reflection on them. Are they total prudes or are their lives that small? Because yes, it's out of character for you maybe, but it's far from "scandalous."

NotnowMildrid · 22/02/2026 15:51

Please stop being so hard on yourself.

People have done far worse things!

I would meet up, and probably put myself out of my own misery, by speaking up, hands held up and say sorry folks.

Ice broken, and that’s the end of it 💐

101Alsatians · 22/02/2026 15:52

So not that big a deal!!

XH and I went to a wedding when DS1 was 9 months old.Our (well,I know now 'my') first night out since he was born.Was already knackered,anxious about leaving him and not used to drinking for a long time.

We got absolutely hammered. Most of it was a blur,but we were told afterwards that we were ALL over each other,snogging our faces off,I was twerking on him,he was undoing his shirt buttons...need I say more. Mortifying.We had to be edited out of the video,was that bad. I'm usually,um,rather reserved.

People found it funny,but we were luckily overshadowed by a wedding 2 weeks later where the best man hit on everyone,including the MotB,pissed himself on the dancefloor, called the bride a bitch then jumped over a wall and broke his legs.

I promise you,we did run in (usually) normal circles.I blame it on the heat here 🤣

Your bog nap seems rather tame now,no?

Lugol · 22/02/2026 16:04

SimpleSingle · 22/02/2026 11:58

Whats behind it is feeling like a failure and an embarrassment to my children. What sort of a mother does that???

You're not just a mother you know, you're a woman in your own right.

I know it's easy to forget that but you're allowed to get drunk and let loose once in a while FFS.
As long as you didn't hurt yourself or anyone else - and you didn't, then laugh it off. EFT is good for the anxiety on stuff like this.

Jackalacka · 22/02/2026 16:04

You’re being too hard on yourself. Cut yourself some slack.

It’s natural to be embarrassed and in sure the joking didn’t help but it’s time to forgive yourself.

Was the joking brutal or all in good spirits? Did they laugh with you or at you? If brutal then Im not surprised you are nervous to see them. Worse, is if they recognised your pain and kept it going. If so and you’re concerned about a repeat of the same then time to make a boundary with them. Say it was funny the first time but the joke is now wearing then and may we please move on. Take control of the situation, before they do.

Sammy900 · 22/02/2026 16:05

I know you are feeling awful about it and feeling ashamed and yes it wasn't your finest moment but you were drunk and weddings are a long day fuelled with alcohol. I imagine there were other antics that people didn't feel proud of.

You need to own it, take the jokes, feel the embarrassment, find the funny side too (and in time you will), let others know you are also mortified..they'll understand. I imagine part of them taking the mickey is to make themselves feel better about similar things they've felt ashamed about in the past...it's relatable but this time the joke isn't on them.

Trust me they won't be thinking about it 24/7, they've got their own internal worlds to think about. If someone falls out with you or disowns you or something for that then that is a complete over-reaction. People aren't perfect especially when intoxicated. Hey it could've been much worse!

Don't cancel meeting up with them. Just go and be brave and face the music and then move on

jellyfish798 · 22/02/2026 16:22

If I could rewrite history so my Dad just passed out in the loo instead of calling the bride's dad a wanker, believe me I would choose this! This is the sort of thing ppl laugh off, whereas the wanker incident is still spoken about years later! I promise no one is that bothered about your nap in the loo 😆 most likely they've seen much worse! It's just hanxiety and you'll be fine, it's really not that bad :)

Boomer55 · 22/02/2026 16:24

Send yourself up with it. Much much worse happens at weddings.

Dery · 22/02/2026 16:38

Honestly, OP, this is nothing. No-one was harmed. I think it’s a bit mean that people are talking about it because there’s really nothing to see here. I thought you were going to say you’d got really drunk and made a pass at the groom. Put it out of your mind.

MyDeftDuck · 22/02/2026 16:41

Own it, face the music, they’ll soon get bored with taking the piss.

JustMyView13 · 22/02/2026 16:51

SimpleSingle · 22/02/2026 11:58

Whats behind it is feeling like a failure and an embarrassment to my children. What sort of a mother does that???

One who really needed:
A) A great night out
B) 5 minutes peace
C) A decent nights kip!

Just own it. Honestly, we have all been there. Today’s news, tomorrow’s chip paper. If they ask, laugh it off. I guarantee nobody is thinking about it as much as you are. The worst thing you can do is cancel. Go and have fun, life’s too short x

surrealpotato · 22/02/2026 16:59

SimpleSingle · 22/02/2026 11:58

Whats behind it is feeling like a failure and an embarrassment to my children. What sort of a mother does that???

Ha, mine would have.

MusicMakesItAllBetter · 22/02/2026 17:05

Grizelina · 22/02/2026 15:15

It was years ago - we all used to make a joke of it! Everybody has done something they were embarrassed about and if they haven't they've led very sad lives!

Show quote history

I was joshing 😜

BlimeyOReillyO · 22/02/2026 17:22

outerspacepotato · 22/02/2026 15:42

You're 40 and your body isn't processing alcohol as well as it used to. You passed out from drinking.

If you're embarrassed by things you're doing under the influence, maybe it's time to moderate how much alcohol you drink.

What a great suggestion, I’m sure OP hadn’t thought of this fabulous idea.

BlimeyOReillyO · 22/02/2026 17:22

OP, let yourself get over it, it’s not a big deal.

Be kind to yourself!

BiscoffCheesecakes · 22/02/2026 17:29

Blimey, I've done far, far worse in social situations when drunk! I try not to think about it. I think falling asleep at a wedding is one of the least embarrassing things I can think of. I wish that was my most embarrassing 🤣

BiscoffCheesecakes · 22/02/2026 17:32

How are you an embarrassment to your children? I assume they weren't even there

I once threw up in the kitchen bin after a few too many the night before, in front of dd2 who was a toddler at the time. It was quite funny

chatelai · 22/02/2026 17:39

An elderly friend of mine got so drunk at a wedding that her son had to be phoned to come and pick her up. She literally had to be carried out of the venue. She then wet herself in her son's car. She didn't apologise, either to her son who then stayed awake with her all night to make sure she didn't choke or to her nephew, whose wedding it was.

Stop giving yourself a hard time. Falling asleep in the loos is a cute story. That's all.

HeadDeskHeadDesk · 22/02/2026 17:54

Just be a bit kinder to yourself please. In the grand scheme of things, falling asleep in the loo is one of the much, much better things you could have done because you were drunk.

You didn't vomit onto the dance floor, or fall head first into the wedding cake, or dance on the table causing it to collapse, or start a flaming row or a fight with anyone, or try to snog the bride's father or interrupt the speeches to announce that you've always thought the groom was a pompous twat. There are a hundred things you could have done that are worse than falling asleep. Let it go and laugh it off. That's exactly what everyone else will be doing.