Made to feel uncomfortable

[Scottishlassie10]

Now I’m all for people wearing what they want but I do think there is a time and a place. My husband was in the health club last night relaxing in the jacuzzi when a group of young women in their early 20s wearing bikinis that left little to the imagination (think thong bottoms and boobs barely covered) started parading around. They came into the jacuzzi which I know they’re entitled to do, however 2 sat next to him and 2 directly facing. It’s quite a big jacuzzi so they had no need to sit where they did. He was the only male in. He felt he had no option to leave as this made him feel quite uncomfortable. Now I may be unreasonable in my thinking but I do think if the shoe was on the other foot and a male was to strut around the poolside in a thong or a group of men where to sit in an empty jacuzzi in close proximity to a female complaints would be made.

Really? You couldn't tell from the context that @Scottishlassie10 inadvertently left out the word "but"?

As in "He felt he had no option (but) to leave as this made him feel quite uncomfortable."*

Honestly....

I’ll say it again - if some men wearing thongs and or tight teeny speedos got in a jacuzzi and sat close to me I would feel uncomfortable.

But this is MN, had it of been this you'd be having replies from "he's probably on the sex offence register, dirty paedo" to he's probably trying to get into your bikini bottoms and how you should have gone and got management to drag him out and ban him for life.

Anyone else sick of men perving in young women and making them the problem, and the women who support them.

I absolutely construed that the husband left, so my criticism of pp suggesting he could have left still stands.

Oh come on. The disingenuous/faux-naive bit is getting a little wearisome.

Tiny little thongs mean you are covering pretty much nothing. If the wearers didn't have a hollywood wax first, you'd be seeing their pubes. Which grow on their vulvas.

Women say they wear them because they make them feel sexy. But why do you need or want to feel sexy at a public spa with your mates? I find it all a bit creepy. Just wear a normal bikini or swimsuit and stop trying to involve innocent bystanders and children in your sexy time.

Sorry. I missed that. 🫢

The only arsehole in this scenario would be the creep in the jacuzzi describing young women in far too much detail.

I don’t think that all all, I do think they did it to embarrass him though and it worked.

And in what universe is that the same as wearing bikini?

YANBU I hate seeing people walking around with their arses hanging out. IMO it’s marginally more acceptable on a beach where they might be trying to avoid tan lines, but massively inappropriate in leisure club.

They didn’t do it at all. Maybe one to embrass him if he was sitting perving, but all of them, nah,

Men walk. Young, attractive women parade.

Apparently 🙄

So what exactly do you think? Because that’s how it came across to me!

They showered to embarrass him, when he could have looked away? They “paraded” round the pool, when he could’ve looked away?

And strut. Don't forget the 'strutting' .

To make his wife jealous and need to come on MN to blame them! Like the ones that blame the women that their husbands have had affairs with.

Surely they have legsm therefore they would have the choice. Why wouldn’t they?

He's not "made uncomfortable". He's choosing to feel uncomfortable, if indeed this happened the way he's told it. I think the use of "parading around" is significant, and I'm rather sceptical about the alleged rubbing of breasts and arses.

He described everything that happened to make you jealous and you’ve fallen for it!

Apparently not. He was incapable of looking away during this traumatic experience.

I think there's a shred of a reasonable point here. It does seem the etiquette on how revealing its acceptable for swimwear to be in a public bathing space has changed, with parts of the body that were once covered now not always, and I think that an element of discomfort at seeing something you're not used to seeing in public is understandable.
Where it all went a bit wrong was with the silly false equivalence between a man who's seen more female flesh than he thinks proper and a woman who is joined in the hot tub by 4 or 5 men. Obviously her 'discomfort' would be different from a man's on account of the very different patterns of behaviour between men and women, and which sex is more likely to be harassed, and which more likely to be simply a bit embarrassed.

Exactly.

Yeah poor lamb, lost the use of the swivel on his neck!

Do you really have to ask this question?
Do you not understand the difference in power dynamics? Or than men pose a physical threat to women?

Quite. There’s no logic to wearing one in an indoor setting like this other than wishing to show off your arse. It’s exhibitionistic.

He’s relayed this “story” in depth of arses, boobs, skimpy bikinis, parading, sitting too close to home, surrounding him… it’s a fantasy he’s relayed to you.

He was the only man in the jacuzzi, washing he the only man in the swimming and area?

I think you need to lol closer to home for the real issue.