Made to feel uncomfortable

[Scottishlassie10]

Now I’m all for people wearing what they want but I do think there is a time and a place. My husband was in the health club last night relaxing in the jacuzzi when a group of young women in their early 20s wearing bikinis that left little to the imagination (think thong bottoms and boobs barely covered) started parading around. They came into the jacuzzi which I know they’re entitled to do, however 2 sat next to him and 2 directly facing. It’s quite a big jacuzzi so they had no need to sit where they did. He was the only male in. He felt he had no option to leave as this made him feel quite uncomfortable. Now I may be unreasonable in my thinking but I do think if the shoe was on the other foot and a male was to strut around the poolside in a thong or a group of men where to sit in an empty jacuzzi in close proximity to a female complaints would be made.

This thread is incredibly judgmental on both sides.
Thank God in the real-world people are entitled to voice their opinions on relatively unimportant matters without being shouted down and name called.

I will always shout down any man perving on young women and making up shit like thry were all slowly rubbing their breasts and bottoms. And unimportant, no far from it, it Is absolutely important we take a stand against sexist misogynistic pervy bull.

Agh FFS she WASNT BODY SHAMING THEM! she passed a comment that she had SEEN A LOT OF BUTTS.
My daughter is bright and hilarious and doesn’t suffer nonsense. If I’d attempted to say when you’d suggest I should have said she say ‘yeah, and? I didn’t like looking at their butts though why do I have to look
at their butts I don’t want to see some old woman’s butt cheeks’

Why would it be totally different, exactly?

Oh, you felt uncomfortable? Don't believe you! Grow up!

If you were there and witnessed this, good for you, all perverts should be challenged....if you were not, stop transferring your own thoughts onto someone else.
You sound ridiculous.

I’m surprised at this thread. Or maybe not?!

@Scottishlassie10i get it. If I was in a jacuzzi and a few men with thongs all rocked up and sat close to me I’d feel uncomfortable and move too.

I know we all have bums, boobs, willies and vulvas. But we don’t all want to see them.

the whole my body my choice and we can choose what we wear stuff only seems to work one way. As soon as there’s a man doing anything it’s all shock horror. Like the naked bike ride thread a while ago!!

some women know exactly what they’re doing. I’m not saying these women did anything wrong. But if we feel uncomfortable then we has a right to that feeling. I don’t particularly like the naked sheer dresses that are everywhere at the moment on teeny celebs. But somehow it’s ok for women but I bet if men started doing it and being naked in public - MN would be in uproar!!

theres also the side that if he had dared look or accidentally touched a leg as he was getting out that he’d be the one flamed.

I think he did the right thing but a shame he had to. Some women wear those teeny non existent bikinis to be looked at. It’s not for a sun tan or comfort is it in the UK in Feb

You said she’d called them gross. I’m only going off what you’ve said and how I’d react if my 11 year old made that comment.

If he followed that up with the comment about ‘old women’s butts’ then I’d hit the fucking roof.

Teach your child some respect.

I mean, you're proving my point about double standards beautifully.

JFC

Rubbing bums and breasts?

Parading around?
**
I do think those type of bikinis are more suited to the beach.

Do you mean some women were using the facilities in swimwear and were showering and walking from A to B like every other person including your husband?

If my husband came home and told me this story, I would be embarrassed for HIM. Weird.

Mate, they're not outdoors.
I think jacuzzis are warm.

You don’t think judgmental, sexist or body shaming comments should be challenged? The right to have an opinion doesn’t mean you have the right to go unchallenged.

Except for some people (myself included) they are. I'd never think of forcing people to wear booty shorts as I hate leggings - so why are other people so determined to police and enforce people they think are wearing too little...

See im going to bite now because somehow this has turned into ‘my daughter has issues’ because when she’s standing queuing on stairs waiting for a water slide and she’s faced with several naked butt cheeks infront of her (bar a thong) and doesn’t know where to look because SHES FKN 12!) . And shes not used to seeing strangers arses. So she comments on it. And now SHE is the problem? (And my parenting apparently). Fk me. World’s gone bloody mad.

I can't beleive it's 2026 and we still have women telling other women to cover up because the meer sight of their body offends men.

Men go swimming with nothing but a pair of tight speedos and no one bats an eye. But a woman exposes more than your preferred amount of skin and she's asking for it. But obviously you can't cover up too much either, as Muslim women will tell you.

And obviously if Muslim men or women started say that women shouldn't be wearing bikinis at all and it's offensive to them to see women's practically naked bodies you'd all be up in arms.

A woman's body is not offensive. Nor is it for mens attraction. A woman can wear what she wants, whether that's for comfort or becuase she likes what she sees when she looks in the mirror. The only parts of your body you need to cover is your genitals and arsehole.

I teach my kid to mind their own business about other people's bodies as should anyone.

It is also completely different to a woman feeling uncomfortable around a group of men. He was uncomfortable with the meer sight of them, their simple existence near him. They posed him no risk at all and gave him no attention. They were just near him.. women feel uncomfortable by men becuase men can be a risk to women, it's men's behaviour that makes women uncomfortable, not simply the look of them.

So if he doesn't think they fancied him, why did he say they knew what they were doing when they rubbed their boobs in the shower? What were they doing then?

What @Solost92 said.
x 💯

I can see what she means though - when you climb the stairs to the slides and you can see bits you don’t really want to!! And yes you have to look to walk up the steep stairs. If you look to the side there’s a high chance you’ll face plant right into that naked butt 😂😂😂😂

The OP has not said anything to body shame the young women, she said her husband felt uncomfortable, both by what they wore and how they acted.

How that can translate to him being a pervert and a weirdo I find very odd, and very judgmental.
22 pages in, and there have been a lot of exaggerated posts....from both sides.

Yes it would be interesting to know the layout.
I've been in a hotel spa which was an oblong and you could have small groups enjoying it without being in another groups face. So I was thinking maybe this was the deal here. A couple of others that are like a small square pool.
Please come back op and tell us about the layout.

I also went to one (never again) that has the tiniest jacuzzi I've ever seen. In theory it seated 4 but if there were two people in it, you felt like you were really encroaching (and your knees would probably be touching).

It gives you a soggy bottom, so not a very good tart 😂

some women know exactly what they’re doing.

Yeah, wearing a skimpy bikini. It's not difficult to understand. But it's not a weapon or a crime. It doesn't "do" anything. If a man gets hot and bothered, that's on him to self regulate. If he can't cope with seeing some skin, he needs to stay away from swimming pools. It's not on women to curate his surroundings for him. He knows what he's doing too.

Where did I say they were outdoors??

i meant that they’re not in a hot country trying to avoid tan lines?!

Don't rise to it, I doubt many of the people on this site who give self-righteous parenting advice, have ever had kids of their own.

You said "it's the UK in Feb".
I'm saying, they're nice and warm in the jacuzzi.
It doesn't matter what season it is.