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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

dd15 induction tomorrow & i have a bug

264 replies

lunarwhisper · 12/02/2026 19:57

Reposting in AIBU for traffic
Trying to keep this brief

My dd is 15 and she's 3 days overdue we went to the hospital yesterday for reduced movements all fine but she's been booked in for an induction tomorrow
We arent the closest and werent before the pregnancy either due to her behaviour at the time and she was living with her dad for a few months befoe she found out but i was meant to be her birthing partner .

Since shes been off school we have been closer and going out together when my younger dc are at school but we did have an argument as she wants to call the baby something ridiculous and she called me controlling

The dad isnt the nicest of boys and tbh neither is his dad ive only spoke to him once and that was when i told him dd was pregnant and he said how did his son know its his and called dd a slag

They eventually broke up and he was bullying her along with his friends in school which made her anxious about attending , she blocked him and they had no contact from december until recently , they aren't back together but apparently he does want to be involved

Anyway fast forward to the issue, she is due to be induced tomorrow and I've woken up today vomiting and I don't feel the greatest. The dc’s dad aren't really involved tbh but the plan was he come here and be with the dc (though they'll not be home during the day) and I go with dd. Im now unsure what to do as I wont be much help to dd and obviously with a bug on the labour ward wont be good anyway

The dad is under 16 so i doubt just then would be allowed and I dont think dd would want him there anyway , i don't know if shed want her dad there either(i wouldnt have wanted mine there at 15 and we were much closer than dd and her dad) and im unsure how much use he’d be

What the hell do we do??

OP posts:
HelicoPie · 14/02/2026 02:01

Go in a separate car - wear a mask. Explain at the hospital the situation. It’s a hospital so half the folk there are sick. But you must be honest with everyone. Your daughter needs to know you would do anything for her and only didn’t attend because it was a risk to her/the baby.

and agreed - do whatever you can to find someone else. A teacher, a friend of yours. Give her options of support. She has no idea what’s about to happen.

it doesn’t matter what actually happens - she needs to know you tried your best.

Notashamed13 · 14/02/2026 04:07

user1473878824 · 14/02/2026 01:52

She’s being induced due to reduced movement. Would you push that back by 48 hours?

Those were the options in my opinion, simple, not my choice. Obviously I would stay away, I've had a stillborn, hospital ignored my reduced movements so know the seriousness.

EleanorReally · 14/02/2026 06:42

i was induced the evening before, had ds at 16.30 the next day, so it doesnt Always take days

HighStreetOtter · 14/02/2026 06:45

HelicoPie · 14/02/2026 02:01

Go in a separate car - wear a mask. Explain at the hospital the situation. It’s a hospital so half the folk there are sick. But you must be honest with everyone. Your daughter needs to know you would do anything for her and only didn’t attend because it was a risk to her/the baby.

and agreed - do whatever you can to find someone else. A teacher, a friend of yours. Give her options of support. She has no idea what’s about to happen.

it doesn’t matter what actually happens - she needs to know you tried your best.

And patients with d&v are barrier nursed in a seperate en suite room. They may well not have the facilities for Dd to be in a separate room until she’s actually in labour. She’ll be on the antenatal ward first. But even then, the OP would be using the same toilet as her Dd so she’d be risking giving it to her Dd. No new mum with a newborn wants d&v in those first few days!

yikesss · 14/02/2026 07:06

I hope all is well x

Sellseashells · 14/02/2026 07:22

KiddyMcKiddly · 13/02/2026 21:44

Quite. I (solicitor) used to act for a young person who was the beneficiary of a trust fund, set up with the compensation payment her adoptive parents received from the NHS trust who negligently allowed her teenage birth mother to labour without intervention. The midwife took the stance that the silly girl shouldn't have got herself into this predicament, and should stop making such a fuss. Turned out baby was stuck and was eventually born with cerebral palsy. A lovely, bright and caring person condemned to a lifetime in a wheelchair and with profound communication difficulties, because of the judgemental attitude of the medical professionals to the poor girl in labour.
Everyone in labour needs support and compassion - moreso when it's a young mother. This attitude stinks.

Thank you @KiddyMcKiddly.

I reported that post but almost wished I hadn't because I was hoping someone would shoot it down better than I could. I'm glad MNHQ have let it stay for that reason.

rainbowstardrops · 14/02/2026 07:27

Hoping all is well @lunarwhisper

Sunshineclouds11 · 14/02/2026 10:07

i keep checking to see if baby has arrived yet!
Hope all is well

lunarwhisper · 14/02/2026 10:18

Thank you for checking in all dd gave birth to a gorgeous boy at midnight he was the first Valentine's baby born at that hospital

dd originally said she didnt want an epidural in her birth plan etc but she did say yes when it was offered at the time but they're both doing well

I'm still not 100% and weirdly my youngest was sick again last night after being fine for about 3/4 days

OP posts:
SpiritedFlame · 14/02/2026 10:26

lunarwhisper · 14/02/2026 10:18

Thank you for checking in all dd gave birth to a gorgeous boy at midnight he was the first Valentine's baby born at that hospital

dd originally said she didnt want an epidural in her birth plan etc but she did say yes when it was offered at the time but they're both doing well

I'm still not 100% and weirdly my youngest was sick again last night after being fine for about 3/4 days

Congratulations to you all. Hope Mum and baby are doing well!

Sorry your youngest is poorly again :(

RootRot · 14/02/2026 10:33

Congratulations to you all

rainbowstardrops · 14/02/2026 10:47

Congratulations to you all!

EleanorReally · 14/02/2026 10:49

oh lovely news
congratulations

Neighbours87 · 14/02/2026 10:51

Congratulations on your new grandson

zingally · 14/02/2026 10:58

onlyforyou · 12/02/2026 20:35

dd doesn’t have any friends? You don’t have any friends that she knows? I wouldn’t let her go alone (unless that’s definitely what she would prefer)

I accompanied a friends teenage dd to an intimate medical procedure because mum was ill and only other person available was her dad. I didn’t know her well at all but she just needed a woman to support her, I’m sure there is someone who would be willing to do the same.

Agree.

Is there no auntie or kind family friend? I'd do this for any of the teenage girls I know without a single thought.

Stickytoffeetartt · 14/02/2026 11:29

Congratulations OP, I hope you all feel better soon and get to see your dd & new grandson 🥰You will probably get lots more comments offering input from people who haven't rtft to see that baby is now here!!

TirednessOnToast · 14/02/2026 11:34

Many CONGRATULATIONS to you and your brave Dd on the safe arrival of a baby boy.
You all did just the right thing x

Sunshineclouds11 · 14/02/2026 12:04

Congratulations to you all!

Hope you all start feeling better soon.

wishing your DD well!

Quickchangenow · 14/02/2026 12:11

zingally · 14/02/2026 10:58

Agree.

Is there no auntie or kind family friend? I'd do this for any of the teenage girls I know without a single thought.

Keep up! Beautiful baby boy has been born ❤️

CaptainMyCaptain · 14/02/2026 12:14

Congratulations to all.

NattyDenimLurker · 14/02/2026 12:16

Congratulations to you and your DD. Flowers

RootRot · 14/02/2026 12:26

zingally · 14/02/2026 10:58

Agree.

Is there no auntie or kind family friend? I'd do this for any of the teenage girls I know without a single thought.

Check the last update, OP’s grandson has arrived, they managed to work it out

Sellseashells · 14/02/2026 12:57

Congratulations! Fabulous news. Well done dd ❤️

DontTellMama · 14/02/2026 13:00

Awww congrats OP, glad baby boy has arrived safely. When is DD due to come home? Do you have more than one bathroom? Norovirus (if it is that) can survive on surfaces for up to 2 weeks, so you need to be militant with cleaning. Would she be safer staying elsewhere if people are still unwell? Is she planning to BF or FF?

Dontlletmedownbruce · 14/02/2026 13:05

Thank god all is OK, I hope DD is recovering well. It sounds like she has been through a lot already with the awful boy bullying her, I hope for all your sakes he and his family have little to do with you both. I hope you feel better soon and enjoy the baby snuggles. Wishing you all the best

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