To ask, think before you judge who is using the disabled loo!

[Highlandcooo]

I often use the disabled toilet, as even though I have a newborn baby and a toddler and I’m in my thirties I also have a stoma which requires more space and access to a sink within a toilet cubicle.

I am so sick of being judged when I’m out for using the disabled toilet! Only today when I was coming out of the toilet with my pram two people made comments about mothers using the disabled toilets and not ‘waiting their turn’. I ignored them but this happens a lot and I’m getting tempted to show them my stoma bag next time! I have a radar key which was legitimately sent to me with my stoma supplies but people presume I’ve bought it so I can use the toilet with the pram.

AIBU to ask you to think first, if you ever judge people for using an accessible toilet?

What's more physically disabling than having young children? How fucking dare you write such uninformed crap.

In terms of toileting in a one-person designed cubicle, having two babies in your arms leaves you with no ability to even pull your pants down. So yes, in a toilet situation with no space you become disabled from using the toilet. I did not mean children make a person disabled, just disable them from doing certain things in certain spaces.

Arse police 😂

I managed it with 3 under 15 months. 15 old month twins and then a newborn. Never once used the disabled.

How did you manage? Cubicles are tiny.

Well done, that is impressive. I really don't know how you managed that. Hats off!

Slings thinking ahead and the 2 second speed wee. With two or 3 babies you plan meticulously anyway. Many toilets are huge so you can fit a buggy in, those that aren’t you use the sling you keep in the basket underneath for such eventualities.

You carry 3 babies in a sling at once? That’s amazing… How?

It absolutely isn't. Radar keys apart, there is no reason anybody can't use a toilet that is adapted for disabled people because that is just what it is. A toilet that is adapted so that disabled people can use it. I agree that disabled people should get first dibs on adapted toilets, but it doesn't mean that nobody else can use them.

I say this as a disabled person

Just clip on another one?!

Or in the real world, use removal spray, clean and dry skin thoroughly, or the bag won't stick, apply powder, barrier spray and powder again, apply barrier ring, apply bag, apply flange extender. All while the stoma continues to output, because unlike a sphincter, you have zero control of it. Now try doing that in a tiny cubicle with no surfaces to put supplies on, or wash hands before and after.

Clip another one on indeed!

Most toilet cubicles are tiny, the baby changing and feeding rooms never have a toilet so yes I wonder how you did it?

Often, if you have a non emptying appliance they are 2 pieces so they have a flange and to change the bag does indeed clip and clip onto said flange/baseplate whatever you want to call it.

Anyway the point is a young fit person without any other issues can easily empty or change a bag in a bog standard cubicle, those with disabilities and dexterity issues of course need assistance and more space in an accessible facility.

You don’t look disabled …. You don’t look ignorant but here we are

Right? Several times when out with just one baby I couldn't wee because there was no space and no one to open the disabled. Even with a sling, there was nowhere to leave the pram and I've no idea how you slingwear 3, certainly not just to wee because you refuse to use the accessible loo

If you can’t hold your poop long enough to wait for a spare cubicle I think you probably have a need for the disabled toilet and should have that situation investigated if it’s happened more than once or twice.

You might actually have something wrong with you, maybe you aren’t getting the message you need to go early enough which has caused a form of incontinence?

No.

The point is that you don't have a stoma and you are telling some people with stomas how easily they can do things when they are telling you that they don't find it easy.

What makes you think you know better? How bloody rude of you.

Read a few comments down... I have IBD

So your point is, well pointless, because you actually have a legitimate reason to use the disabled loo.

Yes but its not a disability? My IBD does not entitle me to use it - im not disabled. My point is that sometimes anybody could find themselves in an emergency situation where a disabled toilet is better than no toilet!

Same goes for people with IBS - they can have sudden awful bouts of diarrhoea. Theres not even anything medical they could really take to help them - so others suggesting "if you are that desperate, go to the Dr's theres something wrong with you" - people do go to the Dr's... They dont get any help!

It's a medical condition though and urgently needing to use the toilet due to a medical condition is exactly what those toilets are for.

I think you need to use Google. IBD is considered an invisible disability.

You can actually apply for a “can’t wait” card which will give you access to toilets not generally open to the general public.

If you are about to wet/soil yourself, then there is nothing wrong with using the disabled loo. It does not matter what the reason is.
No one is going to give you a medal for shitting your knickers because you refused to use the disabled loo.

That's exactly what I was saying earlier in the thread because so many people were being all "there is no excuse ever to use the toilet without a disability bla blah"

A medical condition can be considered a disability in law if it substantially affects day to day life and is expected to last more than 12 months. Pretty sure that would cover many people with IBS or IBD, you don't need to be 'registered disabled' or claiming PIP to 'count'.

I used the disabled toilet when I had a pram with a baby and a toddler. What else am I supposed to do? I don’t barge past anyone waiting. I wait my turn.