Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WWYD? School Incident.

353 replies

ciscowife · 10/02/2026 17:21

DS (13) is a weekly boarder. Last night he texted me “can you come and get me”. I tried to call him a number of times to see what was the matter. I decided to phone the boarding house as this is out of character for him. Was told there had been an incident and he was very upset. Drove to collect him immediately without knowing what had happened. He was in an absolute state when I got there.
He had been dragged into a bedroom by a Y13 and Y10 pinned to the bed, wrapped up in a blanket so he couldn’t move and then threatened with being water boarded, and having various liquids and things shoved in his mouth. Luckily they were interrupted by the lady who was on duty. She knocked on the door and opened it to tell them something, DS shouted for help and managed to get away but he was then chased by them. He tried to run away from the school to get away from them.
The school dealt with it quickly and we had late phone calls with deputy head followed by meetings today. The two boys have been suspended for the rest of this week which basically means they are getting an extended half term break.
We feel that this isn’t acceptable punishment because it could have been an awful outcome. Some friends who are either in boarding/teaching have said that this should be a police matter and the council safeguarding team should be informed.
So WWYD oh wise mums in the net!

OP posts:
user1476613140 · 10/02/2026 17:44

Switch schools. That is unacceptable. And involve the police as that is classed as assault.

Evaka · 10/02/2026 17:44

Your poor little boy. Police all the way.

xOlive · 10/02/2026 17:45

100% phone the Police yourself.
And whatever other route you need to go down.
A Y13, so 17/18 year-old?
That is assault. If they’re 18, an adult has assaulted a minor and the school has suspended them?! Wtf.

PinkLegoBalloon · 10/02/2026 17:46

Holy shit that's terrifying!

Personally I'd report them to the police as they are well over the age of criminal responsibility, weren't deterred by an adult, and were very extreme!

Even if the police can't press charges I would want their names logged with the police. Kind, mentally healthy teens don't do stuff like this.

I'd keep my ds home until I was completely satisfied he was safe. If the boys aren't expelled my child wouldn't be going back.

WaffleParty · 10/02/2026 17:46

Do not send your son back to that school. Contact the police and look at new schools. Horrific.

Emmaheather · 10/02/2026 17:48

What does your son want?

dicentra365 · 10/02/2026 17:49

Honestly - move him to a day school where he couldn’t be assaulted in his own bed. This is terrible safeguarding by the school.

Applespearsandpeaches · 10/02/2026 17:49

Your friends are right, and I would call the police myself regardless of what the school said or did - at y13 that’s a pretty much an adult attacking your child in an extremely cold and dangerous way and frankly way beyond a school disciplinary matter.

Wintersgirl · 10/02/2026 17:51

BoredZelda · 10/02/2026 17:35

I would be calling the police and looking for another school.

This

SargeMarge · 10/02/2026 17:54

Call the police yourself, obviously. My kid had a lot less happen at school and I called the police… and I’m in Scotland where our police always go “oh, it’s really a matter for their parents and school to talk out as we don’t like to get involved with teens” but I was having none of it and involved my MP.

Zanatdy · 10/02/2026 17:54

I’d be calling the school and asking why this hasn’t been reported to the police and advise that you wish them to report it, or you will be. This is horrendous and I totally agree an extended half term is hardly a punishment, unless its pending a full investigation.

EBearhug · 10/02/2026 17:56

What outcomes do you want? Even if the school turns round and says, "we have investigated, and those boys are now expelled," would you want your son back there? I can't imagine he'd ever feel secure there again, so you would need to withdraw him and find another school. Does he want to ho back at all? And if for some inexplicable reason, thry didn't expel them, it just wouldn't work for your boy at all.

I agree you should call the police and report the school's lack of safeguarding, and lack of notifying you.

Viviennemary · 10/02/2026 17:56

Those boys should be expelled.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 10/02/2026 17:56

Your friends are right. This is a police matter.

loulouljh · 10/02/2026 17:57

Poor boy. That's just awful.

B1anche · 10/02/2026 17:58

If this happened to an adult in the workplace (or anywhere else), you would report the incident to the police.

I say stand up for your child and report it. Fuck the school's policies.

REDB99 · 10/02/2026 17:58

Yes, agree police and serious safeguarding complaint to the school. I’d expect to see a risk assessment in place to show how they will prevent an incident like this in the future.
I would very likely not send my child back unless they were very keen to stay. Is this a one off or is there a bullying culture at the school?

Allusernamesaretakendammit · 10/02/2026 17:58

ciscowife · 10/02/2026 17:21

DS (13) is a weekly boarder. Last night he texted me “can you come and get me”. I tried to call him a number of times to see what was the matter. I decided to phone the boarding house as this is out of character for him. Was told there had been an incident and he was very upset. Drove to collect him immediately without knowing what had happened. He was in an absolute state when I got there.
He had been dragged into a bedroom by a Y13 and Y10 pinned to the bed, wrapped up in a blanket so he couldn’t move and then threatened with being water boarded, and having various liquids and things shoved in his mouth. Luckily they were interrupted by the lady who was on duty. She knocked on the door and opened it to tell them something, DS shouted for help and managed to get away but he was then chased by them. He tried to run away from the school to get away from them.
The school dealt with it quickly and we had late phone calls with deputy head followed by meetings today. The two boys have been suspended for the rest of this week which basically means they are getting an extended half term break.
We feel that this isn’t acceptable punishment because it could have been an awful outcome. Some friends who are either in boarding/teaching have said that this should be a police matter and the council safeguarding team should be informed.
So WWYD oh wise mums in the net!

Yes you can get the police involved- what they did was a criminal offence- just because it happened on school property, doesn't mean that you can't. Even if nothing comes of it, thats not the point. These kids and their parents need to understand the gravity of these actions.

MrsMoastyToasty · 10/02/2026 17:58

Ask for their bullying policy document.
Demand a meeting with the head teacher.
Report to police. Especially if the perpetrators are over 18.

ApplebyArrows · 10/02/2026 17:59

Surely after an incident this bad the school should have called you rather than waiting for you to call them!

HisNotHes · 10/02/2026 17:59

Wwyd?

I’d never send him back to the school and let him know he can be safe at home every night with me for as long as he wants. Safety and mental wellbeing is more important than an elite education.

WorkCleanRepeat · 10/02/2026 18:00

This is a police matter. Y13's are not children. I'd expect them to be expelled.

lessglittermoremud · 10/02/2026 18:01

They continued to chase him after being interrupted by an adult?!
What was the adult doing to try and stop them continuing…
Your Son must have been terrified, I’m claustrophobic and that sounds horrific. I wouldn’t be sending him back full stop but depending on your situation you may feel you have no choice, they need to tell you what they have put in place to stop further attacks, there is no way this is the first time they’ve attacked someone in this way.
If you’ve already had meetings with the head and you’re not happy then usually you have to escalate it to the board of governors, the school will have a set procedure to follow.
I would report it to the police on the non emergency number so it’s logged and make the school aware you have done so.

Bikergran · 10/02/2026 18:01

I agree that there should be a police complaint, and a report to the local Education office. I would remove my son from that school. I do not say this lightly, I did the same for my son 30 years ago when he was being bullied, and staff were complicit.

honeyrider · 10/02/2026 18:01

This is a police matter, they need to be reported and as previously posted they probably have a history of assaulting others.

Swipe left for the next trending thread