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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband told daughter to stop chewing so loudly in his ear

392 replies

Meg878o · 09/02/2026 07:18

AIBU to be upset and angry about this comment my husband made to.our 11 year old daughter. We'd been out swimming, treated the kids to a pack of sweets each, in the car on the way home. Daughter and husband sat next to each other in the back and all of a sudden he says to her 'can you stop chewing so loudly in my ear' it clearly offended her. Thoughts please...

OP posts:
Zov · 09/02/2026 08:28

YABVU, why on earth was she doing this? I would have said the same to her. Your DH did nothing wrong.

Bushmillsbabe · 09/02/2026 08:29

11 year old girls get offended by everything, I wouldn't be too bothered. Children have to learn that their actions impact on others. If her Dad is noticing it, her friends definitely have and it's nuch better that she hears it from him than them

GeorgeMichaelsCat · 09/02/2026 08:31

No one wants to hear loud chewing noises. Team DH.

Lourdes12 · 09/02/2026 08:31

My thoughts are…. Are you ok?

hididdlyho · 09/02/2026 08:32

Buckle up, she's about to be a teenager and likely to be offended by equally mundane stuff on a daily basis! I don't see anything wrong with what your DH said unless he got right in her face and said it in a threatening way or something.

Lilactimes · 09/02/2026 08:33

Gosh really? You are cross about him stepping up giving her some behaviour tips??

How do you think kids grow up without chomping through their food, churning it around in their mouths like dirty washing in a machine so the whole world can hear or see it???
Parents coach them or tell them an alternative way to eat!!

In case you don't know yet, you have to tell them lots of things!!! from frequency of washing, how to wash, where to wash, how to keep themselves healthy, and habits that MAY not be liked by prospective friends, partners or employers when they're older. THe list includes chewing loudly, but also can including farting burping bad BO poor toilet and sanitary behaviour.

OMGitsnotgood · 09/02/2026 08:34

Nothing worse than a loud eater. Teach her how to eat quietly. If it is bad enough to annoy her Dad, it will be bad enough to have her teased at about it. And it really is unoleaaant to listen to other people chewing loudly

Wordsmithery · 09/02/2026 08:34

Would you prefer she turns into one of those adults who eats loudly with their mouth open? I sat next to somebody doing this on a train at the weekend and wondered how he'd got to adulthood with such a lack of awareness. Gross.

AzureRose · 09/02/2026 08:36

Children are often pissed off the first time they're told off for something.

It's "affected" her ...of course it has

Boomer55 · 09/02/2026 08:37

Too much drama from you and your daughter. Bad eating habits are horrible. DH was right.

Sudagame · 09/02/2026 08:38

Good for him, better him than a stranger.. and l bet that would really send you into Mummy Bear mode🙄.

Womaninhouse17 · 09/02/2026 08:38

It's a good idea to teach children to not annoy other people, to eat quietly and with their mouth closed.

TittyGajillions · 09/02/2026 08:38

How do some people survive if they're angry, upset, and offended by the smallest of things. No wonder young people can't cope with anything, resilience is a lost skill.

rockingroller · 09/02/2026 08:39

Very reasonable of DH. Loud chewing is a bad habit DD needs to drop.

PollyBell · 09/02/2026 08:39

I would have said the same

WiseMoose · 09/02/2026 08:40

Well done your DH

I wish more parents would teach their children good manners

Why are you so upset about this ?

HessianSack · 09/02/2026 08:40

A complete non issue (the telling off). Are you and your dd normally this sensitive? Exchanges such as this will happen ten times a day in any normal household.

Womaninhouse17 · 09/02/2026 08:41

If she's used to never being corrected and you're on her side about everything, I can see why she's offended.

IamnotSethRogan · 09/02/2026 08:42

I once moved away from my son in the cinema because he chewed so loudly

Gotmyoldshoeson · 09/02/2026 08:43

My thoughts are that either:

  1. You have a misplaced belief that children should not be corrected on their behaviour. This will not do your kids any favours.
  2. you really, really hate your husband so have misjudged this interaction due to your extreme negative over-ride of your H. You may have good reason to hate him, but not over the particular incident in your OP.

Being upset and angry over this is completely irrational. You need to think about why you had this reaction, and then deal with that.

DreamyRedNewt · 09/02/2026 08:43

How can anyone think this is worth posting about on Mumsnet is beyond me...😂😂
This is the most ridiculous first world problem

sugarapplelane · 09/02/2026 08:43

FFS Op!! Angry and upset? Over dramatic or what!!!

Your DH was being a parent and trying to instill good eating manners into his child.

I know plenty of adults where a quick “please eat more quietly “ by their parents when they were children, would have done them the world of good as adults.

Eating loudly is awful to listen to.

Get over it

Ilovelifeverymuch · 09/02/2026 08:46

LiteraryBambi · 09/02/2026 07:23

Upset and angry because your DH asked your (his too presumably) daughter to eat more politely?

Are you ok?

But he clearly offended her princess 😂

The fact she created a thread on mumsnet for this is hilarious 😂.

storminabuttercup · 09/02/2026 08:46

Depends if it was mouth wide open chewing or just normal noise.
my father is intolerant to many noises and growing up was tough, eating an apple had to be done on a different room, ditto crisps etc. I ate as quietly as possible, was totally paranoid that I was too noisy, I wasn’t I realise now but I did have quite a complex about it

we also just stayed in our rooms if we had colds as coughing etc (always covered mouths) would get you the filthiest look

so like I say depends. You can’t eat in complete silence but a gentle, close your mouth when you’re eating love would be kinder.

Macaroni46 · 09/02/2026 08:48

I had a colleague who was perpetually single. He was in his 40s. Seemed nice enough. Then one day I sat next to him at lunch. His loud chewing and slurping noises were revolting. The rumour was he never got further dates after taking a potential partner for a meal.
Loud chewing is horrible. Teach your DC to reflect on their behaviour rather than being offended by being told off.