Husband told daughter to stop chewing so loudly in his ear

[Meg878o]

AIBU to be upset and angry about this comment my husband made to.our 11 year old daughter. We'd been out swimming, treated the kids to a pack of sweets each, in the car on the way home. Daughter and husband sat next to each other in the back and all of a sudden he says to her 'can you stop chewing so loudly in my ear' it clearly offended her. Thoughts please...

upset and angry… really?! Are you normally prone to overreacting?

Not at age 11. She should have been corrected with love long before this. I think this is a wind up.

Agreed, the amount of regurgitated and repetitive tripe on here currently is off the scale

It's quite astonishing that she's managed to get to the age of 11, and still doesn't know to eat with her mouth closed. It's not rocket science, simple manners. That's it. God, noisy eating is so irritating. I'm with your husband ALL the way with this one.

You’re all assuming she was actually chewing loudly. My ex used to tell our daughter off for chewing loudly - she wasn’t. He also told her off for wrinkling up her nose (at random times, not directed at anyone), a bit of a habit she had formed. She was a nervous wreck and mealtimes became awful. She’s an adult now with very good table manners, not a noisy chewer and is now non contact with her Dad. Some people, when they’re in a bad mood about something, make peevish and mean comments to other people to make themselves feel better. Only you know the answer to this OP. If she is a noisy eater then he could have said it a little more kindly IMO, something like ‘close your mouth darling please, I can hear you chewing.’

This has to be a reverse, surely nobody would be upset about this 😂😂
Dad is either downplaying how rude he was about it, or exaggerating the reactions.

My husband chews loudly with his mouth open and sounds like a pig. I have been aware of it since we were dating and I made a conscious decision to accept it as everything else was great and I am sure I have my quirks too.

It's not a quirk-it's bad manners that can easily be corrected!

How has he not noticed that others aren't eating like that?

Well, she had to learn from someone.......

Chewing is a sound that many, many people find very difficult to handle. Loud chewing is generally considered very bad manners as a result.

11 is perfectly old enough to know, or else be told, not to do this.

I have to tell my 11 yo quite often - he finds it hard as he is going to need a brace but he is capable of chewing with his mouth shut, and other people outside the family aren’t going to tolerate it.

Different if an aggressive tone is used by the adult of course, there’s no need for that.

By your own account, he didn't tell her anything; he asked her not to do something which is yick. He even said please.

You too should be teaching her to eat without making the whole company listen to her doing it. And if it offends her to have disgusting bad manners pointed out to her, well, maybe she was offended by anyone being so horrible as to potty-train her, too, but so what? There are some things people do need to learn as children, and not slurping and chomping loudly while they eat is one of them.

Why on earth would you want your daughter to do something many people find repulsive?

I wondered that.

”Thoughts please” is quite a male way of writing.

And the claim he “said” it to her. But my reply was based on face value that it’s not a reverse.

If this is all you've got to worry about in life then you clearly have fuck all going on.....

He is right, it's gross. Your daughter also needs to get a grip if she offended by this in all honesty -so do you

Pressed wrong selection by accident 😭
Child needs telling...

I cannot stand people.chewing loudly and would have to say something if it was someone i knew or even a family member . I find kids are the worst for it especially when eating sweets but yesterday a man was stood next to me chewing gum so loudly i honestly wanted to batter him
I had to move away

It's literally your job as parents to encourage good manners. He made her aware that she was being rude. I can't see how that could upset you.

This.
Better her father than friends telling her.
Chewing with your mouth closed is very basic.

Don't be so bloody wet! Your kid is in for a difficult life is she is so easily offended

He shouldn't have said it but I can't stand the sound of people eating unless im eating too. It's potentially adhd related and not uncommon. Something like chewy sweets would make the sound 10 x worse!

If she was chewing loudly, she should be told. Better her Dad, then another child at school etc.

Also, why is your husband in the back…assuming your son is in the front….I don’t know why families do this, I personally find it very disrespectful. Adults in the front, children in the back. Even when my husband isn’t in the car my 13 and 7 year old are in the back.

My thoughts are;
He did nothing wrong

I understand it's entirely possible she wasn't chewing loudly and he's just sensitive to the sound. If that's the case then he could have put it that way. If she she was chewing loudly, then he's right to ask her to stop. I find it weird that people defaulted to her chewing rudely.

Zero replies from the OP.

Angsty opening post.

Sit back and watch the froth. Such posting seems de rigeur. Or indeed, all the rage.

I’ve been telling my kids to eat with their mouths closed since they were toddlers, in my humble opinion it’s quite rude to chew with mouth open at that age.

I’m guessing mum also chews with her mouth open hence the angry thread