To be confused as to why hiring a cleaner is seen as an indulgence?

[Gahr]

This is something that I see time and again on this site, and it is SO WEIRD. People seem to think that it is the height of luxury to have a housecleaner, and also seem to be strangely apologetic about it, offering disclaimers as to why they need one. Also, I've noticed that on threads when someone has a problem with their cleaning service, they will get several posts telling them to 'clean their own house'. Nobody would tell someone to 'service their own boiler' or 'fix their own toilet'! I don't understand it at all. I have a cleaner and I wouldn't be without her.

I don't get it either......and the way they carry on like the cleaner is some pathetic slave, absolutely desperate for such lowly work. So much so we shouldn't use them and if we do apologise profusely.

When the reality is cleaners want us to use cleaners so they can earn a bloody wage !!

Clearly it’s a luxury 🤷‍♀️ Paying mortgage, putting food in cupboards and paying utility bills are necessary. By all means have a cleaner but don’t be so oblivious to the fact that it’s only ever going to be a choice for people with the disposable income to afford it.
I don’t see the controversy though - if you want and can afford then have one !

IKR. So many virtuous and hardworking people on this thread. Lol.

I’ve never heard a man apologising for not cleaning his own house , doing his own shopping or cooking or laundry or caring for his own kids .

Almost all the men I know over 30 yo outsource some or all of this to women - paid or unpaid . Their cleaner does the house and laundry , their mother drops off meals , they use delivery services for food shopping , they eat out / get carry outs and their GF cooks at the weekend .

all this is seen as Women’s work and therefore of no value . I man who outsources is sensible and pragmatic , a woman is lazy and self indulgent.

Men’s free time outside work is important and valuable, they need to relax and de stress from their important Man Job.

Women's free time outside work is seen as a community resource which should be spent on others - looking after joint responsibilities such as children, house, extended families and volunteering .

This extends even into retirement. How often do we see posts on here saying “is my mother/mother-in-law selfish for refusing to look after our children three days a week? “ .

No one ever asks this about their father or FIL. They are entitled to retire - it’s only women who have to keep working until they drop.

Are you on engaging in the economy? How do you get through the day without using anyone else’s labour?

If you have a £35 a week luxury judgement you could:
use a cleaner
use a dog walker
get a takeaway on Friday night
order a Gousto box
get your nails done

None are morally better or worse - except maybe the Gousto box. Put your money into the local economy and a local self employed person!

@Gahr this thread is hilarious. The fact that anyone is judged about how they spend their own money is ridiculous.
I also have a cleaner, I pay her what she asks, it’s a lot! But she’s thorough and reliable. I sacrifice going out for dinner to pay for her, so I don’t think I should be judged ( but I am). It comes out of my ‘spending’ pot so to speak, so it’s not a luxury.
Another way of looking at it, is that I’m employing someone…….

you believe cleaners are better off unemployed?

Oh, well. Get on a flight to North Korea, then. I'm sure you will find life much more acceptable there.

YANBU. If you work and earn a living then why not.

It's the value that you put on your time. If doing different things that isn't/aren't cleaning is more worthwhile to you go for it.

The time that I spend not cleaning is worth the money and I'll keep my cleaner for long as I'm able.

Well good for you😊. Happy for the ppl who have one and can afford one. You are obviously oblivious to the world where ppl struggle financially for a multitude of reasons not of their making mostly. Additionally there are choices pay a cleaner and no extras for kids maybe? Cleaning isn't the top of everyone's agenda, it's a perpetual circle never ending and can get obsessive. I.am happy to clean myself to my own standards, I admire cleaners, they provide a service that I can't see being taken over by AI.🙂

Of course I am taking part in a capitalist economy. Everyone is part of global capitalism.

I don’t understand your thinking here? Are you suggesting that people use cleaners because they lack the intelligence needed to manage their time? Bizarre.

Op, if you fell on hard times unexpectedly, the cleaner would be one of the first things to go and you wouldn’t even have to think about it.
But it is obviously a relative thing. To you cleaners/ window cleaners/ gardeners etc = not a luxury (though not a necessity either). To other people it’s overwhelmingly obvious that they are.
Some people may judge you because they have a different lifestyle and can’t imagine being able to afford that kind of luxury, but so what? It’s not hard to understand why. Just ignore them. On mn people get judged for literally any old thing anyway.
The thing is, if someone on a genuinely average income can afford to get someone in to clean their house for them something is really out of whack. If you’re earning an average wage, what’s the cleaner earning? Way below average? The same?
My mam used to clean for extra money - hardly anyone can earn enough from cleaning houses to actually live on.
And to those who say it’s not unskilled or they wouldn’t be able to do it themselves- you don’t generally get any training to clean, you just do it until it’s good enough and in time you get more efficient and effective at it, that’s all.

I used to have a clearer and it was great as she was so reliable and freed up family time. She also used to do some ironing. I miss her but know it was a luxury.

Our cars are both older than ten years old, and we can't afford to go on a foreign holiday every year but we still have a fortnightly cleaner. We have busy lives and I hate cleaning so there are lots of things I'd cut back on before we got rid of the cleaner. It's all about priorities and how you want to spend your money.

Lol, how do you know what would be 'one of the first things to go'?!

This is the same argument they used about forcing small children up chimneys. Do better.

So what’s your point?

can manage to keep on top of cleaning.

I can, I just don't want to.

The trouble is of course that I'm a woman, cleaning is still seen as women's work, and women obviously should not be able to make their lives easier. Nobody bats an eye when I hire a gardner to trim the hedge - I can manage do do that myself as well, just don't want to.

Cor blimey I can here them weeping with self loathing from here 🤣

I would love a cleaner but I can’t afford one. I haaaate cleaning with a passion. If I could afford to have someone come round and make my house sparkly, I would100%!! I don’t judge you for having a cleaner. It’s great you can afford one. There will of course always be jealous types of people who will put you down for your choices. As long as you’re not boasting or rubbing your fortune in the faces of others, try not to let green eyed monsters get you down x

Oh FFS, you cannot be serious.

The opposite of capitalism is not authoritarianism.

I’d never heard of a ‘daily’ in terms of a a cleaner. Silly me eh