To think my Grammar School DD 2 with an IQ of 119 should be aiming for at least Grade 7's in all her GCSE subjects.

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My DD'2 is currently in the process of choosing her GCSE options for next year year 10 and at a Girls Grammar School in Essex. However, I am seriously upset with her attitude at the moment regarding what she thinks grades she should be achieving at the end of year 11. The, schools expectations are grade 7 and above for all subjects . The, other problem is because DD is in year 9 she obviously did not do her SATS at 11 so I have no predicted pathway to convince her. DD'2 has convinced herself, she will only be capable of at best 'all' grade 5's at end of year 11 despite having a decent IQ of 119. For, the record DD 1 IQ is 122 and she is expected to get between 6- 8 GCSE's at 9 and the others at 7/8.
Am I reasonable to think she is just being lazy, or is she suffering from a little bit of confidence, due to 'impostor' syndrome and her sisters likely results. I have looked at various sources online, which suggest that with a good study ethos her grades should not be hugely dissimilar to DD 1's. There, are also a couple of 'rebels' who are friends of hers playing up at school currently, for which the school believe is year 9 blues..

Well what do the school predict her?

IQ is a strange way for you to be using your assess ability. For example, I have a high IQ (was a Mensa member, IQ of 152) but got the worst results of all my siblings. My brain just works in strange ways I think!

Stop focusing so much on numbers and start communicating with your daughter. That way you'll know for sure what is bothering her, instead of guessing on an online forum. You're raising a human, not a set of numbers you can boast about to anyone who will listen. What does she want? Is it realistic? How can you guide her without pushing her away?

IQ is fairly meaningless.

Even with a high IQ she’s not necessarily going to be good at everything. Mine was measured at significantly higher than that and there was no way I was ever going to get more than a 3 in design & technology (mandatory subject for me)

Yes, talk to teachers. What are they saying at parents evening?

IQ doesn't really come into it with teenagers. Not even sure how you know what it is!

I think it's quite normal for Y9 kids to be a bit unmotivated about GCSEs - they haven't actually started the courses yet so it's hard for them to meaningfully think about what grades they might be aiming for/ have a sense of how they are performing.
I'm also saying this as kindly as possible but do you think you might be putting quite a lot of pressure on her? You seem a bit fixated on IQ (which is not a perfect test of intelligence) and comparisons with her sister. Maybe just chill a bit for now and see how she gets on when she's actually started her GCSEs.

Wait - calm down, a Grammar school in Essex must be a super selective, she wouldn't be there unless she had a good chance of getting all 9's, so I suspect DD2 is cracking under the pressure a little bit and suffering from a temporary lack of confidence, she's year 8? take the pressure off and reassure her for now.

Perfectly put 👏👏

DD is year 9...

And she's bright enough to have gotten into a super selective Essex Grammar, that's fantastic, build her confidence this year, its all about building her up until she believes in herself and when she believes then she will put the effort in and it become self-reinforcing.

"The, other problem is because DD is in year 9 she obviously did not do her SATS at 11 so I have no predicted pathway to convince her".

Why did she "obviously" not do her SATs? The current Yr9 would have done them.

Do you think she's trying to manage your (and everybody's) expectations?

Is she happy to commit to doing her best? Can you take the focus off grades and work on that instead?

Those two IQs are within the standard error measurement and a hair's breadth from each other. Effectively your girls are equally bright, if you set store by IQ tests, which I wouldn't advise too heavily.

I think a batch of 9s from someone who is at 90th centile is a big ask, actually.

However people are correct that you are being rather odd in focusing on IQ numbers. I hope DC2 hasn't been made aware that her IQ is "lower" than her sister's (when really, it isn't).

Not all schools (independent sector) do SATS and not schools inform the children / parents if they are doing SATS.

My DS is in yr9 and he did SATS?

What she’s aiming at is a bit irrelevant at this stage. She needs to be working to the required level of effort (getting homework done on time and paying attention in class) and getting what she gets. I’m sure the teachers will help with exam technique and study tips.

Her IQ is also somewhat irrelevant. She’s obviously clever to have got in to a grammar. But the IQ you quote (how did you test it btw?) doesn’t make her a genius.

DD 2 was at an Independent Prep school before entering Secondary School.

I never said she was a genius . I am just thinking she should be able to at least attain 52-53 combined points over 8 GCSE subjects which is required for 6th form entrance. Basically 4 7's and 4 6's should be attainable for her. This, because on this forum everyone's child seems to get at least these type of grades.

How bizarre to mention their IQ

My son is predicted straight 9s (in a comprehensive school) but it's never even occurred to me to get him to do an IQ test

How do you know your children's IQ? It sounds like your DD is panicking and worried. Maybe she feels genuinely out of her depth. Maybe theres only a couple of subjects she really feels invested in. Ultimately, don't let your DD burn herself out trying to be the perfect daughter. It will backfire.

The school for the record expects/require a grade 7 to study subject at A Level. Therefore, the school expects grade 7's as a minimum expectation, especially around English Language/ Literature and Science subjects. I just find it bit concerning she has 'written' herself off without even starting year 10. The, school has done a bit of Preparatory work for Science GCSE's already with year 9's for which she did OK and was around the middle of the group. She, has also said the idea of doing 2 hours homework Monday- Friday is not something she wishes to do. I currently have to make sure constantly that she is doing around 1 hour 20 minutes a night homework, because if I did not watch her she would lie to me how long she had spent on it !

Just let her be. Your anxiety and pressure will put her off from doing her best and will backfire, especially if there are already some kids rebelling. Kids thrive when they enjoy what they do and are self motivated. All this focus on ‘KPIs’ and IQ isn’t showing her that just doing her best is what matters. And what if she failed them all? Would it affect how you feel about her? If the answer to that is yes, then this is a you problem and not a her problem.

She's not even started her GCSEs, I don't even know why you're discussing what grades she's going to get. How do you even know their IQs? Chill out.

Several of us are curious to know why you had your daughters' IQs tested. Could you tell us?

I'm also curious why you often use a rogue comma after the first word of your sentences. That's not a thing. It's weird.

Were you a natural scholar yourself OP?

Why do you have their IQs 😂 - sorry op it’s really wierd and a bit braggy/show off tbh (is that IQ really high tho?). I think your poor kid is trying deal with your expectations because let’s be honest…. This is very much a you thing now… she’s probably trying to manage your expectations.