Husband left his friends who I don’t know alone in our house with our 6 month old

[28loloie]

So I’m not sure if I’m over reacting.

DD is 6 months old, I haven’t left her alone with anyone properly yet, I’ve left her with DH while I go a walk but the longest I’ve been away from her until yesterday was maybe an hour.

Yesterday I went to brunch without DD for a few hours, it was my friends birthday and I really wanted to go. DH said he would have DD and invited a few of his friends who I don’t know super well (they live in the city so we don’t meet them often) to keep him company.

I got back yesterday afternoon, his friends were still there. I asked how everything had gone and DH told me he had to nip out for an hour as his little sister needed dropped to A&E, so he left DD with his friends. Apparently she was fine. 1 of his friends is female, 2 were male. He reckons he was gone for just over an hour and his friends said that they gave her a bottle but other than that she was happy just getting cuddled.

We have never left DD with someone who wasn’t me or DH before. I always figured our parents would be the first people we left DD with. I don’t know these friends and while I’m sure it was fine, I can’t feel certain that they are good people. DH thinks I’m over reacting, she was perfectly safe. I feel he made a unilateral decision which could have been easily avoided if he just took DD with him.

AIBU to feel he shouldn’t have done this.

“Abandoned”??? Don’t be so silly!

Do you not know that babies form attachments? This is not new news. They like familiar faces. You maybe left yours with unfamiliar faces but the op clearly isn't happy with that which her dh would have been well aware of.

There were other options the df should've at least had a conversation with his wife, we do all have phones nowadays it isn't rocket science.

I think YABVU, but perhaps that's because it's your first child. The baby is 6 months old, not 6 days. "First time being left with someone other than one of its parents" really isn't a milestone, and even if it was, this was an emergency.

I assume the reason your husband didn't call you at the time was because he wanted you to continue to enjoy your precious day out and not have to cut it short or be worrying. I would expect my husband to do the same thing, and so would I if the situation was reversed.

I trust my husband to make the best call in any specific situation with my child, if I am unavailable or otherwise occupied. If we are both there then it would be a mutual decision, but my opinion doesn't count more than his just because I'm the mother.

If I didn't trust my husband to make good decisions with the welfare of my child (which yours did in this situation), then I would think we had real problems.

Of course I know that babies form attachments! Pretty sure that being left with kind people in their own home for an hour is damage their attachments. Not rocket science.

The other options involved delaying the taking of a badly injured 11 year old child to hospital, FFS.

The baby was safe and well. That is what mattered.

Good god, how do we think baby's form attachments, by spending time with people.

It was a hour. An hour!

These were trusted friends. Who have no doubt met the baby before.

Calling Op would have been a complete waste of time. And delayed getting the girl medical help

It seems to me to be undeniable that the absolute priority in this situation should have been the 11 year old with broken bones. Which is what happened. Well done, that man. Which is not something I say very often.

I agree. He did the right thing. I hope your sister in law is okay.

almost certainly he’d be helping his mum and sister get into a&e and that would be far easier without a baby strapped to his chest. Two broken bones is a lot!

My daughter has broken a couple of bones and was very calm, but she couldn’t walk and needed a wheelchair and to be moved really carefully. So it was really good your husband could help

I would have been uncomfortable with that.

I wouldn’t leave my baby with a stranger in any circumstance ,unless the house of full of cameras that I can access and monitor .

Faced will a role reversal, would you have left your baby with your lifelong friends? Would you expect your husband/partner to be upset if you felt your trusted friends were capable?

Not a stranger, three friends the husband has known since he was a toddler.

The baby wasn’t left with strangers 🤷🏼‍♀️

I agree. Good thing that’s not what happened here.

She said her husband’s friend she doesn’t know a stranger to me is a stranger to my baby I don’t know how they are .

do you not trust your husband?

They weren’t a stranger to her husband. The child’s other parent.

You are all insane saying it’s not a stranger, so if you leave your baby as the mother with your friend and your friend leaves your baby with her bestie who you don’t know then it’s ok with you ? It’s exactly the same you don’t know them so they are a stranger , go ahead leave your kids with anyone related to anyone you know .

That's not what happened though. In your convoluted analogy it's the same as the mother leaving the child with a friend she's known since she was a toddler.

What a question I don’t trust someone I don’t know my husband has nothing to do with it .

since when was your husband on the same social par as your friend?

he is the childs parent.

But that isn’t what has happened here though is it? At least get your facts right.

A child was being cared for by one of its parents. There was an unforeseen emergency. The parent left the child with their trusted, lifelong friends for an hour.

The fact this was the dad shouldn’t make a difference. He’s either an equal parent or he isn’t.

Don't you trust your husband’s judgement?

FTR, the OP did know them, has met them before a few times, just doesn't know them that well, so they weren't even strangers.

The point was, the childs parent had an emergency and left his child with his friends that he has know all his life and trusts.

It is NOTHING like you leaving your child with a friend and then that friend palming them off on someone else. Its the same as you leaving your child with your friend.