Cried for 90 mins

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Last night my little one woke and was creaming at 4.15am. I thought something was wrong but he just wanted to go downstairs. I tried to comfort him in my arms but nothing was settling him. Took him in my bed which he rarely comes into and we watched my phone. Probably shouldn't have done that but I can't stand his crying.

He wasn't sleeping but it was nice to have him under the duvet with me.

After 10 mins I put him back in his cot and his room. Same issue occured again - crying to go downstairs.

I just left him in the cot until he eventually slept at 6am.

I did go in one or twice into the room but honestly I can't settle him when he wants to go downstairs and I told him it's dark outside.

I was watching him on the room camera so he wasn't in any danger.

Did I do the wrong thing? Next door is hard of hearing so won't wake him. I live just with toddler.

How old is he?

2 years plus 2 months

He also isn't bothered about bed sharing. I have a bed in his room but he doesn't care for bed sharing

If you were distraught for an hour and a half would you want to be left by yourself in the dark? Or would you have wanted the person who’s meant to love and care for you to comfort you and be close to you? Would you leave him crying for that long in the day or is it only okay at night?

So was he crying for over an hour. I could never let any of my 4 left to cry it would break my heart.

I imagine he cares less for being left alone in distress.

He’ll be fine.

Was he left alone? Did I not state I went to attend to him, out him in my bed, try to comfort him? Went in a few times? He would only stop crying by going downstairs at 4/5am. It was too early.

Playing him videos on your phone is only going to make him wake up. Surely if he was in your bed watching video then he could have just fallen asleep in your bed with you instead?

He had no interest in going to sleep, just wanted to go downstairs. He was crying and his crying wasn't stopping. It was a way to stop his crying instead of going downstairs.

Distress is him wanting to go downstairs. Is that distress of a tantrum? It was 4/5am. Too early for both of us.

No, I don't think you were wrong. So he was just crying because he wanted something? He wanted to go downstairs. He wasn't hungry, not thirsty, not in pain or needing a nappy change? I'm afraid he needs to learn that night time means sleep time, for you as well as him.

are you saying he only stopped crying when you took him to your bed AND pulled out your phone?

you should just have had him in your bed surely ?

what do you mean by “he doesn’t care for bed sharing”

sometimes they might like it if they are upset even if they don’t like it other times ?

Why have you posted? For people to tell you it’s okay?

He wasn't sleeping but it was nice to have him under the duvet with me.
So he had stopped crying until you put him back in his cot.

Because he was watching my phone. When the phone was of it was back to being wide awake and wanting to go downstairs. I didn't want him to fall of my 4 poster bed either, so back to his cot.

He doesn't care about bed sharing. He doesn't find comfort in it. He wasn't going to try to go asleep. He was trying to get of the bed and was sitting upright. Didn't care for my cuddles or kisses, me talking to him. He wanted to go downstairs.

Some children don't care for bed sharing.

Can you not read?

I was asking for advice.

But he didn't want to go back to his cot he wanted you.

Thank you for understanding.

Yes he just wanted to go downstairs. Usually if he wakes up he can cry for a short period of time, be comforted etc but he wanted to go downstairs.

What can I do instead of letting him cry, or is crying ok? My mum says it's just a noise to show he wants something.

No, he wanted to go downstairs and not sleep

Why not just keep him in your bed…? You obviously didn’t go back to sleep as he was crying so what was the point in making him upset? He’s a small child, he’s not doing it to be a pain. I sometimes get woken in the middle of the night by my small one, we have a snuggle read some books whatever. I’m not getting out of bed to go in the living room but I’m not abandoning a distressed child. I work full time and I’m exhausted, but we all have times we can’t sleep or wake up upset for whatever reason. He’s a tiny human.
Yes you did the wrong thing. Don’t ask if you don’t like the answers.

I think mine had night terrors at this age. They'd wake themselves up and cry.

I found sitting on their bedroom floor in silence with my hand touching them so they had reassurance I was there. Maybe holding their hand or just next to their leg.

You need to sleep train this out of happening. I dont agree with getting them out of bed into mine, if they sleep well in their own bed.

I also had a digital clock in their room when they could recognise a 7 and explained until there was a 7 at the front. This helped mine understand to lie quietly until a reasonable time.

Good luck and sorry you are getting a hard time.

You said it was because you didn't want him to fall off your 4 poster bed.

Was he crying in bed with you ? Nothing wrong with him sitting up

edit because distracted by exploding soup

when I was small and had the terrors I had to sit up to keep them away