To have sent DCs friends home for this behaviour?

[VictorBaucherOrSomething]

DD (11) had two friends for a sleepover last night. About 9pm I walked into the kitchen to find them playing some 'game' where one of them was trying to make the other two laugh when their mouths were full of water. The girls were holding soup bowls and spitting the water into them, except they were obviously missing the bowls and there was spat-out water on my kitchen floor. I asked them to stop and to clean up the mess they made.

When i returned to the kitchen they were still playing the game, with the manky water still on the floor so I asked them to stop again. I have a mirror in the kitchen and saw the two other girls rolling their eyes behind my back and trying not to snigger. At that point I told them it was time for them to go home, so I called their parents to collect them. One parent was pretty apologetic, the other was less than impressed and was pretty snippy with me.

DD still isn't speaking to me for sending her pals away but I was pissed off with the lack of respect from them. AIBU?

I would have sent them home too, mainly for the eye-rolling.

It was just water- so easy to mop up. Massive overreaction.

It's not about water, it's about respect.... Is that something you are familiar with?

Overreaction on your part. Your DD is unlikely to be invited for sleepovers now that you've flagged yourself as tricky about them. They were just messing about with friends, you could have asked them to clean up when they'd finished, what difference would it have made? Now, if they had then refused to do so, that would be different matter.

massive over reaction.

No way would I have sent them home. Their reaction wasn't great but they're 11 and my biggest concern would be any fall out for your DD in terms of friendship

Are you kidding?

They were having harmless screen-free fun. It was an overreaction to tell them off about it in the first place, let alone send them home. You could have just said "make sure you wipe the floor when you're finished"

Well it's clearly something you're not, given your sarky reply.

Yes it's about respect, but it's a telling off - not a sending home.

No parent is going to allow their child to sleepover again once it gets out, that they've had to go and pick their child up at gone 9pm over something like this.

And the poor kid is now a laughing stock.

I think you you have hugely overreacted. How embarrassing for your child.

Oh tell me you didnt do this 🤣😩

Very embarrassing.

They didn't do as they were told.

I have, in the past - it only happened once - sent a child home for not doing as they were told. If I am going to be in loco parentis, the child does as they're told by me or I refuse to be responsible for them and send them home.

Hopefully your DD has learned a lesson here.

The eye rolling was a reaction to them feeling shame and not dealing with it well, I'd have ignore that tbh.

I would have made them clean up the water on the floor but I wouldn't have sent them home. Tbh I'd have tried to avoid it becoming a battle at all, because I want my house to be somewhere my dc and their friends want to hang out. It's easier to say "when you're finished I'd appreciate to cleaning up" than lay down the law.

Yabu. It's just a bit of water as long as the clean it up after I don't see the big deal. There is a lot worse things they could be doing!
Your poor dd will be so embarrassed. Are you usually this uprtight? It's just kids playing a silly game at a sleepover.

Why would they be kidding? They were playing an innocent game which is easily cleaned up. Chuck a towel down and it’s sorted. It’s literally just a funny game.

I'd have no problem with this with these details...even having to go out to collect.
Nope to being rude and spitting all over my kitchen.

Where did "say thank you for having me go" ?

I also don't care about a school reputation...behave well or consequences...totally served me

I'd have just put a big towel down for them to sit on and made sure they tidied up afterwards. The eye rolling would annoy me too, but I wouldn't send them home as that's effectively punishing your DD for the behaviour of other children.

I doubt this very much. More likely the cannier parents will respect the OP for having a backbone.

Definitely overreacted! Feel quite sorry for your daughter.

I wouldn’t have been happy but I wouldn’t have embarrassed my daughter.

You also need to consider this OP.

Your child isn't long off her teenage years, which can be the most worrying of all for parents as their kids gain newer found freedom.

Overreacting to this degree is not going to encourage your teen daughter to want to hang out at home with her friends in future.

Instead she'll be hanging out anywhere but home, and you'll be regretting the reason why.

I probably wouldn't have sent them home. I would have told them to stop and clean up and that it's stupid to follow social media trends

I agree with this- I have a year 7 11 year old and I really want her friends to feel welcome here so there’s a safe, welcoming house.

I’d have told them I saw the eye roll but wouldn’t have sent them home for it.

There is no backbone here.

Only overreaction.