Partner won’t give me a lift in the ice …

[inkyspells]

So during the night the snow has started to melt and it’s icy out there.
The main roads are clear but the paths are Ice.
Went out this morning and even with my boots on I’ve fallen over.
I get really anxious about falling over so that’s knocked my confidence.
My partner is a manager of a company 5 mins around the corner and I asked him could you drive me to the bus stop just so I can get to my dads and take out his dog and get him essentials (he’s 86 and I don’t want him falling over )
He said no he’s not doing that and I just need to get a grip and walk to the bus stop (about 10 mins but it’s thick of ice )
Bare in mind last night he was on his way home when his work friend text saying the bus hadn’t come so he immediately said “no bother mate il take you home “ 20 mins in opposite direction.
Aibu to be a bit sad he won’t even drive 5 mins to help me out.
Now before anyone comes at me,last year I slipped on the ice and broke my wrist so ever since then I’ve been scared…I have bought decent boots but still it’s a ice rink.

You clearly have not experienced the dangers of black ice.
I have. I can assure you it is terrifying. One second you are in control of the car, then you are skidding of the ice completely helpless.
You are going have to pull yourself together and take that walk. Tough luck.

But that’s not what’s happening?

Around 10 years ago I was seeing a guy. I don’t drive and had to get 2 busses to see him. It would take over a hour to get to his but he drove and it’s a half hour round trip for him. One day the snow and ice was horrific. He still let me get the 2 busses and walk for 10 mins to get to his. Point of my story is I got rid a month later because he was a selfish prick!

Exactly this.
I must be a terrible wife because absolutely no way would I leave work to drive home and take my husband to a bus stop 10 mins walk away!!! The comments on this are so dramatic.

He is really mean ... I wouldn't want to be with someone like this .
I hope you start saying no to him with things he wants from you if you stay in this relationship.
Kindness costs nothing.

Your dh is being a selfish prick how could someone who loves you not go out of his way for 5 minutes. I would be fuming get a taxi and take it out of your joint bank account and tell him next time if he’s not willing you will take the bloody car yourself he’s a cunt especially after picking up his mate the night before you know where you stand in his pecking order.

Another vote to get some YakTrax (I know it doesn't help you right now, but for future.) I used them in remote areas of Iceland, during winter, and was confidently striding about with these on my feet. They're amazing.

Apart from possibly his job

Why are you wasting your life with such a horrible man?
Thats the real question.

She's explained why he can pop out anytime and also about the dog . My H did this when I was working on Christmas day (nursing ),he let me walk home , about 2 miles while he sat in the house . He's my X!

Do you work op?

My DH is also a boss and 20 mins drive away, he would have popped out to help me out if asked.

But maybe your DP is more stressed at work than mine and struggles to get everything done so adding to his list is just too much for him to cope with. It may have been better to time your trip towards the end of the day - getting a taxi there - and your DP could collect you on the way home from work.

This thread is crazy. I am not sure what working world you are all in but being the boss/manager doesn’t mean he can swan in and out as he pleases, the boss has to do work too and also set an example to the team. I can’t imagine doing that and then expecting my team to do as I say not as I do, you model the behavior you want from the team!

You're replying to a comment that was made on the first page, before several OP updates, so you can hardly take issue with the fact that it doesn't account for further explanations 🤣

Regardless, it's bizarre that the very subjective comment that he can come and go as he pleases is being taken as objective, unchangeable truth here.

Your situation was completely different from the OP's.

What does your partner bring to your life exactly? Take the car tomorrow - he can catch a taxi just as well as you can. And think really hard about what energy and love he puts into you.

How are you getting the essentials for your dad?

If he was half ways decent, he'd take over and do the Grandpa/Dog job in your stead, preferably before work so as not to interrupts his work. Miserable git, in my book !

Do you leave work to do so?

You a grown adult and do not need to be wrapped in cotton wool, but I am sure if a man said he was scared of snow all the posters on here would tell his partner to drop everything and rescue him like is a damsel in distress

Awww my aunt is in hospital since this morning just walking to her car in the drive, shattered and ankle so has surgery tomorrow..I would have given you a lift all the way no bus needed

You’re asking the wrong question. This post isn’t about me.

No I was asking if YOU leave work to give your partner a lift

Well, if I was in the office no. But the detail you maybe don’t want to hear is that it would be a 3hr round commute so that’s highly impractical. On my wfh days, I can and do do things like this. For context it’s a 2/3 week. Hope that helps.

We are talking about the op- The op has said he’s happy to run here there and everyone on various errands while at work, so he’s saying giving her a lift is less important than all those.
I never used to ask my dh for anything when I was on mat leave and he’d wfh as I respect that he is working, and then I watched him go for a run, have a nap, do something in the garden… so I asked for help with the baby and I got it.

Honestly I couldn’t be with someone like this. My lovely DH would drive me to my dad’s, or would probably go and do the jobs himself.

Aim higher!