Did I do something wrong? Employee snapped at me

[Brooklans]

For context I am male. A woman who reports to me joined the company 6 weeks ago snapped at me and wondered if this is simply a misunderstanding.

A few weeks ago we had to travel to another city for work, I said I’d drove us both there the following morning at 8am. She gave her address (she’s staying at her parents temporarily) and then later sent me a text so I “had her number for tomorrow morning”. The next morning I arrived slightly early and didn’t call beforehand, and rang the doorbell twice. When she got in the car she said “Please don’t ring the doorbell again, it’s not my house it’s my parents I’m only staying there for the time being”.

She announced the role wasn’t right for her shortly afterwards, and on her final day I remembered she had some company equipment at home (for WFH purposes) and offered to pick them up from her parents house the following evening to save her bringing them back to the office. She text me the next day asking what time I will arrive. I told her and she texted back “Okay. Don’t ring the door bell again, just call when you’re parked outside and I will bring the equipment to the car”. When I arrived later I pulled up and rung her telling her I was outside. Afterwards I got out the car and walked to the front door, I arrived just ask she opened the door with the equipment, she looked taken aback and said “I told you to stay in the car!” I said “You said not to ring the doorbell I wasn’t going to” As she walked to the car with the equipment she said “I told you I’d bring the equipment to the car!” Put the equipment in the boot and walked off back into the house without saying bye. Thoughts?

It really isn't standard to text instead of ringing doorbells. People have doorbells for a reason. It's perfectly sensible to use them at 8 am.

She sounds odd but maybe her parents are hoarders and she’s terrified of an outsider seeing it. There seems to be some stress and anxiety around anyone seeing either the inside of the house or her parents.

Hmmm.

Op, what gives re this?

Best they remove the doorbell altogether then if it causes so much angst. If this thread is even genuine considering OP is a man here and a woman on a previous thread.

He was doing her a favour. If someone is giving me a lift, I wouldn't contemplate leaving it to the last moment to dry my hair or whatever, I would make sure I was completely ready at least 5 minutes before the agreed pick-up time.

And it really would be weird to bear such a grudge about a colleague ringing a doorbell on one occasion that you would leave the job for that reason alone.

What a dysfunctional person. When did not ringing doorbells become a thing? You have dodged a large bullet here. Don't give it another thought

Yeah she quit her job because he rang her doorbell 🙄

Perhaps this is a reverse and OP is the woman. In which case, ironically enough, all the people who think they are attacking him are actually validating her.

I don’t get why you arrived early and rang the doorbell in the first place.

OP why are you female on your other threads and male on this one?

She’s the problem here IMO

Because it's a male getting off on the fantasy scenarios he posts.

OP clearly said she decided the role wasn’t right for her.

She did not have to accept the lift to the other city - she could have just made her own way there but she chose not to. And then despite her unhappiness at someone ringing her doorbell ( which again to me seems a completely normal thing to do) she again accepted his help but transport her work equipment back to the office.

Stop making the OP out to be some kind of intrusive predator. This woman may have had valid issues re her parents home but frankly that’s not the OPs problem. He was helpful. She was rude. It’s probably best all round that she left the company

She sounds demented. Can you imagine working with such a clown?
Dodged a bullet there, mate.

I would have expected you to text but thought it was actually very mannerly that you walked to the door.

You did nothing wrong.

Her reaction was related to something else entirely. She's either just rude AF or else there is something unpleasant going on in her house and she is desperate for privacy. I feel sorry if it's the latter but it's not your problem at all.

Forget about her.

Why is ringing from the car impolite if you are giving someone a lift?

When I meet my friend for dinner in town, i pick her up on the way. I text her to let her know i’m outside and then she comes out when she is ready. What is the problem here?

Is the actual reason she quit her job and snapped at your op due to her being uncomfortable around you as you go on internet forums and claim you are both genders?

I am surprised at the number of posters continuing this thread without reading all the comments, and picking up on this.

@Brooklans she was respecting her parents . You were ignoring her requests.

He arrived a little early.
He rang the bell - you know, like a normal visitor would.

How one earth, when someone is giving you a lift, can you possibly object to that?

We also don't know how much equipment there was, so he was being helpful carrying it to the car.

Fuck me, a bloke doing her a favour and there's so much bitchyness about it.🤯😱

God forbid a woman do something similar for a male colleague either. She'd probably be accused of wanting to shag him on the bonnet of her Audi.

I have never met anyone in the UK - where I live - who is terrified of the door bell. We all use them - or the knocker. What strange idea to have!
What I think is that it wasn't her house and also that there was something dodgy going on...which now doesn't matter. Who quits a job just because they don't like it after six weeks?

There’s definitely a generational situation going on here. Younger people would text, and almost thinks it’s wrong to ring a doorbell. Older people would ring the doorbell, and probably wouldn’t even consider texting.

Also, op said he (she?) arrived early. Five minutes early is neither here on there. Fifteen minutes plus, maybe more so, but 8am is a perfectly reasonable to be picked up, especially if prearranged. If colleague didn’t want picking up from home, they should have made other arrangements.

@JoshLymanSwagger
except this OP usually claims to be female

It really is around here. Perhaps it’s a regional thing?

Even in the days before mobile phones nobody would ring doorbells (or get out of the car) - we”d be looking out for the person giving the lift ready to go and meet them. It would be considered rude to make the driver get out of the car.