To think it was my curry?!

[Lolabear38]

Bit of background - we’ve had guests staying with us for the last 5 days. During that time I’ve cooked and paid for 90% of the meals and cleared everything away. There’s been large meals (they’re big eaters), snacks, puddings, alcohol etc. Relevant just to show I’m not (or at least I don’t think I am) being tight I suppose.

Last night we ordered an Indian take away (I couldn’t face cooking for us all again). We all ordered a curry and rice each, and a variety of sides. For no particular reason I didn’t eat all of my main meal, everyone else finished all theirs. We all had roughly the same amount of the sides. I got my curry and put it in the fridge.

Today we went for a pub lunch so when it came to dinner in the evening I said it was leftovers from the last couple of days and put out everything/ cooked up a few bits and pieces that needed eating. Everyone helped themselves and as they were eating I heated up my curry. DH’s friend, with a plate full of food already, suddenly said ‘oh I didn’t realise there was curry on offer! I’ll have that’. Somewhat put out I said ‘this is actually the curry I ordered last night and kept what was left, I thought I’d finish it tonight’. He replied with ‘But we can all share it can’t we? Leftovers are all fair game’. I kind of laughed it off and when the curry was warmed through I quickly put it on my plate and just sat down to eat - I’m talking maybe 1/2 of a regular portion of curry was left? He looked at me, raised his eyebrows and said ‘I guess Lola doesn’t share food, hey?’

Who is BU?

YABU - leftover curry belongs to anyone who wants to eat it, whether they ordered it or not, stop being so weird.

YANBU - you ordered that curry. Everyone else ordered their own and ate it all. The leftovers of your curry belong to you.

We split the cost of the take away fairly between us all, if that matters.

The would-be curry thief sounds like a really annoying, pushy, mansplaining type - one of those people who thinks the sun shines out of his own arse. I wouldn't be inviting him again.

I would be honest and said something like "this is mine from last night; you've had your share", or "slow eaters often lose out when sharing food with people like you" ...to stop them ever visiting again🙃

You don't like to share - apart from your house and all your cooking, for days on end. What a greedy little shit.

Yes he's greedy & rude but i wouldn't want to have someone else's curry anyway after they'd probably put the fork they'd eaten off in it several times the day before

You weren't very clear, to be fair.
I mean, you literally said
when it came to dinner in the evening I said it was leftovers from the last couple of days and put out everything/ cooked up a few bits and pieces that needed eating
So he wasn't wrong imo to wonder why the curry wasn't in as part of the leftovers too, seeing as it's just that - leftover curry!
So I've voted YABU

Or simply hand him a copy of the menu and say "If you want a lamb madras, feel free to order yourself one".

You should have said “well I’ve been sharing with you for 5 days so that’s not really the case is it?” What a cheeky greedy fucker.

It doesn’t matter what would be usual, as soon as you indicated that you wanted it / it was your leftovers, he should have totally conceded that it was yours.

Completely out of order for him to raise his eyebrows and comment TWICE, once assuming it would be shared and then about you.

Greedy, and very rude.

Agree it’s super weird they didn’t pay for the takeaway.

IMO if you are sharing ‘leftovers’ and the curry was leftover it was potentially fair game, but as soon as you said you were saving it for yourself he should have apologised and backed off.

Right, a decision in which the quantity is relevant and dictates which option you pick. As I said.

(Can you freeze takeaway curry?)

The “I’ll have that” comment combined with the fact he demolished his whole portion of curry the previous evening makes me think he would have helped himself to the entire half portion, not a small share of it.

I would go war over it

All is fair in love and leftover curry, the is right they are fair game but you won it!

At the end of the day you got to eat it and that is what counts

He was very rude indeed to keep pushing for the curry when you had made yourself clear.

I would sort of understand him asking once if he did it nicely (not in the way he did - the way he did was rude “I’ll have that”) but if he’d say “oh can I have a bit of that curry”.

Once you’d said it was your leftovers he should have piped down and been grateful to get on with what he had already been given.

He obviously feels entitled to your cooking and hospitality.

Saying the “doesn’t share food” comment was breathtakingly rude of him, seeing as you’d shared your food and hospitality with him for several days. It was clearly intended to make you feel bad about eating your own curry. Clearly has no scruples about being aggressive - which is what this was - when he doesn’t get his own way.

Oh - and you know if you’d agreed to share, the majority would have gone on his plate faster than you could blink.

You are definitely being unreasonable.

Leftover curry is breakfast food.

This.

She wasn't holding back the nice food though. She bought the takeaway for them and they finished theirs the night before.
If I had been the guest I would have at least offered to pay for the takeaway to say thank you for hosting too.

Exactly. If he'd said, 'Could I have some please? It was amazing last night,' I'd feel differently, but he eyeballed her leftovers and claimed them for himself, and 100% he would have whined that it was 'only half a portion' so 'couldn't' be shared.

It was a bit cheeky of him to ask the first time but unbelievably rude to bring it up a second time, complete with barbed comments. The greedy pillock had a full plate of food that you had prepared for him in your house.

I doubt he has any idea how hard it is to keep preparing food for days, when I am in that situation I often don't actually enjoy the food so much myself so getting a take away would be a relief.

I hope you told the greedy prick to fuck off

I wouldn’t have embarrassed myself by not sharing. I take it there was plenty of other food?

Definitely visit them and sit back.
If it isn't reciprocated, knock any catering on the head, and even visits.

So many women get into this bullshit habit of being skivvy to visitors.
Don't do it.
It is utterly thankless.

Of course it was your curry.
He was just a rude, ignorant, greedy pig.
You should have repeated to him, "its my curry greedy".
I would be telling my husband that.

Unless all the rest of the leftovers were gravel and pig-shit, he had no business wanting yours. Half a leftover curry is hardly a lot, if EVERYONE wanted some it would be less than a spoonful each, so what was he hoping to achieve?

Greedy cunt.
Don't invite them again, he sounds awful.

Is this him?

??

Lovely language