To want a card that says ‘mummy’

[Cheepcheepcheep]

I’m aware this might be extremely precious and if it is then I’d like to be told as much.

Last Christmas, DH got me a card that said ‘happy Christmas mum’ on the front. I told him at the time that, with DCs 2 and 4 at that stage, I’d have liked a ‘mummy’ card. I’m aware they won’t call me mummy forever and I wanted a ‘mummy’ card - I hopefully will have many years of being ‘mum’ but very few where I’m mummy.

Roll on to my birthday in the Spring and I got a ‘mum birthday’ card. It wasn’t a falling out but I reminded him, for the small window I’m ‘mummy’ I’d like a card that says mummy on it not a card one would get their elderly mum.

Roll around Christmas and my card from the kids says ‘to a lovely mum’

AIBU to be a bit upset? We don’t have money for presents this year and I didn’t want anything that cost, but a card saying ‘mum’ on the front feels a bit tone deaf after what I’ve said.

Eldest won’t call me mummy for much longer and it made me sad. I know many have bigger crosses to bear but still

I don't get it. I really don't. How can a generic card written mummy on it make you feel special ? Wait until they can write their own cards- that is meaningful.

Just because it isn’t a tradition you uphold doesn’t mean it’s “highly strung” to expect a Christmas card from the kids. You model the behaviour you want your kids to have.

I like encouraging them to write a card to people they care about and draw them a little picture and they enjoy it. And i feel it teaches them good manners/caring for others. If my DH didn’t encourage them in the same way for my card, I would also be upset.

Well the idea is you buy a card and let your kids draw in it if too young - or write on it if they can, no?

Slightly OT, but I'm 50 and my parents are still Mummy and Daddy in terms of how I address them face to face. I would not give either of them a card that says Mum or Dad because those are not the names I (and my siblings) call them or have ever called them. I currently live abroad in the land of "Mom and Dad". I don't know where, even in the UK, to get a pre-printed Mummy (or Daddy) card - although I think I may have seen them within living memory in Scotland - but one way to go is a "blank" card with a lovely and appropriate image on the cover and no message inside, where your partner hand writes inside - while your children are too young to do it themselves - "Dear Mummy ... " [followed by a personal message] or "Happy Christmas, Mummy!" It's not at all too much to ask, or unreasonable.

when it comes to mother day cards being in the shops (which will probably be next week, bloody ridiculous) find a shop that has mummy ones in stock so you know they have then and then tell dh “asda has mummy cards. i really really really really want one. NOT a mum card. A mummy card. it means a lot to me please can you get a mummy one from each child for me, thanks”.

if one is still not forthcoming you may have to buy your own and give them to dp to give to the kids to sign!

My 15 year old stopped calling me mummy this year. She'd stopped calling me mummy outside the house years ago but it still made me sad.

Id be upset about him ignoring the request for a mummy card too. My daughter's Dad doesnt care whether he's Dadddy, Dad or or if she calls him by his name so doesn't get it and I wonder if your partner is the same?

*daddy

Yeah, regardless of whether people think it's a daft request or not, you are not asking for a lot. You have simply asked for a card to say mummy, and he should get you that as he knows it is important to you.

Though I'm in N Ireland and still call my mummy mummy and my daddy daddy in my 40s, as does pretty much everyone I know.

I don’t think that the card is the issue it’s having requested something and it’s been ignored. If it makes you feel any better my 17 and 12 yr old still call me Mummy!

I (54) was not emotionally close to my Mam but I always tried to get her a birthday/mothers day card with MAM on it because it was important to me, and I think to her. She wasnt a mum or mom or mummy she was a Mam.
I agree with PP that a home made card would be lovely, I still have all mine from my DS, or I would remind him a bit before special days with images from online shops or supermatjets/ card shops.

Edited because I can't spell!

I don't think YABU but I generally hate all the "named" cards so would prefer my DC write on them (or handprints if very young).

I don’t think wanting a card that reflects what you’re known as is unreasonable at all. My dc still sometimes say mummy or muma at 14 although dd1 tends to go with mumaaar (which I don’t hate). They all call me mum in front of friends. I said a hard no to bruv!

My birthday was last week and asked the same thing, a card that says mummy. It was the only thing I asked for. He got the wife and mum (not mummy) cards mixed up as he couldn't give a shit so the card from my 2 year is wife. Asked again for Christmas, only want a mummy card. Got mom not even mum.

if you don't want cards that have wife / partner / daughter on it etc then that's fair enough but the huge market in them suggests lots of people do like cards that represent their relationship with whom the card is from. it can't be that difficult to comprehend surely?

I tried desperately to become someone’s mummy for over 6 years when it was my first birthday as a mummy DH got me a card from my dd saying happy birthday mother with flowers on it a card I would have given my elderly mum, I was so disappointed and told him exactly what I had written in this post he didn’t understand why I was making a fuss he said but you like flowers and it’s a lovely card ( which it was) but I was so disappointed and I’ve been let down a lot in life but that moment was one that hurt the most and it still hurts 25 years later

I think that’s one of the silliest things I’ve read on here, which is saying something.

Completely unreasonable. Your are fixating over something quite silly. Ask your kids to call you mummy. What is this nonsense abiut not being called mummy for much longer at 4. Utter rubbish - you have years and years left.

You still are "mummy", what is written on the card doesn't actually matter.

Sorry, but you are being ridiculous.

But you've specificall asked him three times - can he explain why he decided that, despite the fact you've told him it was important to you multiple times, he's decided that actually, no, you;re wrong, it's not important to you? I'm genuinely baffled here. Either he's a selfish dickhead, or you haven't actually asked him. Which is it?

There are lots of people focussing on whether you're BU to want to be called mummy, surely the point is that your husband doesn't give a shit about how you feel?

this. it's like he's going out of his way to NOT get you a mummy card given how prolific they are

YABU to expect a Christmas card from a close family member who lives in the same house as you. That's just odd. Christmas cards are to send to people, surely? Not to hand over to someone you see every day.

You are utterly ridiculous… at least you got a card!

My DCs in their 20s still call me Mummy.

It’s up to you of course, but ‘mummy’ is rather cringey when used by school aged children.