To be a little annoyed by this token gift

[slightlyjadedbythis]

I do a lot of free babysitting for my nieces and nephews.

One family got me a really lovely gift voucher. It was really appreciated and came with a really lovely card. It genuinely brought tears to my eyes.

The other family (who I’ve probably babysat for for over 200 hours this year) have got me a gift set that is currently on sale for £3. My nephew gleefully declared “we got that on Christmas Eve!” as I opened it, and my sister in law just laughed awkwardly.

AIBU to think that this is a little cheeky when I do so much free babysitting?

Well you know how much you are appreciated at least…. Maybe you can state your new resolution is to charge for babysitting or become less available

I’m already committed to loads for next year and I’m feeling really pissed off

I always used to babysit my nieces and nephews, which was my choice and a pleasure really.

It never would've occurred to me to make some sort of connection between that and a gift at the most expensive time of the year for parents.

This

They have explicitly stated that all gifts at Christmas are in recognition for the babysitting. As they handed it over they said “this is from the kids to say thank you for looking after them” (obviously not paid for by them)

Why do the free baby sitting? If you aren't enjoying it or getting any good feelings of appreciation, I'd let them know you have other demands on your time

Do you want to do the babysitting, or not? Surely nobody is forcing you to do unpaid work especially if you have a full time job yourself.

Stop the free babysitting then. You clearly don’t feel appreciated.

Could they afford to pay you? Are they on a tight budget hence the gift?

Well you’re being a mug for all the free babysitting unless it’s something you absolutely enjoy rather than helping your family out constantly. Yes I’d help my family, but 200 hours is a bit of a piss take.

I do enjoy it, but I also think that when you give up a huge chunk of your time for someone it’s nice for there to be some show of appreciation. They never tend to show it through the year so I thought that maybe it would be a bit more than a £3 gift!

Absolutely could pay. They are very well off.

This happened to my DD who as a college educated (which is what parents wanted) woman babysit for a family once a week for years. Still does. Elaborate gifting by the family…wine jewelry and books and food items all sat out on a table all December with gift wrapping always in progress. For church friends and co workers and the neighbors.

for my daughter…nothing. She loves the little girls and they love her but it definitely was hurtful she didn’t merit any kind of gift.

So did the kids choose it?

Doubtful

This is how I feel. I love the kids and will happily babysit, but when you’re giving everyone lovely gifts and then for me it’s a £3 gift set it is a bit hurtful.

How much when not on sale?

Tbh we don't tend to buy adults. I would have got you something through the year or taken you out for dinner

@Lavenderandbrown how did your daughter react to this? I don't think I would have carried on babysitting if that happened to me.

What fools they are.

Let them find out the hard way.

If there was something through the year i wouldn’t mind but there’s nothing like this. They do it for other people who give them childcare, but it never seems to be much for me

Stop the free babysitting.

You weren't looking for recompense but they've clearly shown you how little they appreciate your contribution to making their lives easier so stop it.

Give them a couple of months notice of your new non availability. Gives them time to make alternative arrangements.

I might find myself jist a little less available next year.

Have you ever said no when they’ve asked you to babysit? It sounds like they are taking you for granted.

It’s not really about the money, it’s about the lack of thought and consideration. After all a framed photo of you and the children, or some homemade fudge, truffles etc made by the kids, or asking the children to draw their favourite memory with you and pop it on a frame or an album wouldnt have cost very much but would have been meaningful and made you felt appreciated.

It’s the lack of thought and care, for someone who does a lot for their family that stings.

I would honour the dates I had promised but hold back on promising more.

I’ve said no once because I’m on holiday the date they wanted and it went down like a fart at a funeral. Really unhappy.