Would you/have you secretly filmed at your child's Nativity?

[Dramatic]

So our school has a policy that you aren't allowed to film/take photos at all, total blanket ban. They don't take photos or film themselves either.

My husband works away and never gets to see the plays so I secretly film them/take photos (just my child's part but there are others in the background) and I show the videos to him.

I don't put them on any social media or send them to anyone else, even Grandparents etc.

Aibu?

They hadn't, it was a free for all

It should have been stopped then. Maybe that's why they introduced a stricter rule.

The blanket ban was there before and after that event.

How do you expect your DCs to listen to you and their teachers when you don't follow the rules yourself?

Imagine fleeing DV or adopting a child with an awful background and you see the entitled twat next to you filming your child.

Child safety is more important than your DH seeing a video. Have your kids dress in costume and sing him some of the songs they learned. Just like people managed to do before everyone had a camera

Not so comfortable about it that she’d do the filming openly though.
Guilty, m’Lud, and she knows it.

It should have been stopped then. It doesn't make it ok for you to film the nativity. In fact, it proves the point made earlier that if other parents see you filming they will be more inclined to do it. You saw those photos and thought it was ok for you.

Do you have any idea how I feel being the person who has put their child at risk? If it wasn’t for me, DDs and DS wouldn’t be at risk.

and then. Stupid people like you who refuse to do as they are told put my child at risk.

you absolute buffoon. Wise. Up. And do as you are bloody well told.

in all seriousness. If you start filming it will erode and my daughter will be put at risk.

he nearly killed me the first time.

he might manage it the next time

thanks to an idiot like you.

I’ve been to three different school Carol services this year and there were plenty of parents ignoring the rule.

We don’t put our children on social media at all because of some issues in the extended family but almost certainly they’re on someone’s Facebook somewhere.

Taztoy - you can’t argue with stupid. Nor can you argue with blinkered people who can’t imagine any other scenario apart from the one they are in.

to you

Well it just seems as though there isn't any major reason if they are happy for photos at some events with children milling around in the background.

I suppose maybe I'm being guilty of what people are saying, "it's been done before therefore it's ok" type of thing.

What do you think parents did before phones? They watched, or they didn’t

We had cameras....

You’ve got a daughter op.

do you think she has the right to say NO to sex and have that NO respected?

or do you think if she says no to sex it’s ok for someone to rape her as long as they do it behind closed doors? Or orally rape her if she says no to vaginal sex?

Because. No. Means. No.

and anything else is a consent violation and anyone who can’t see that is, in my opinion, on a slippery slope to rape apology.

no means no. End of.

I was almost killed by my ex, my children were hurt and put at risk so yes I do understand. But I also understand that if the video isn't put on SM then it erodes that risk.

I have taken people's pov in to account, that others may not be responsible with any footage they take. I wasn't taking responsibility for what others might do but maybe I should be.

Ok now this is ridiculous.

The behaviour from some parents at a Carol service I was at last week was horrendous. The filming wasn’t even the worst of it. Standing up in their seats the whole time so the people behind them couldn’t see, standing in the aisles, pushing right to the front and sitting and lying on the floor right in front of all the children performing, and even a Dad shouting and swearing at a member of staff when asked to move. It was so horrible. It was like they thought no one exists other than their own child.

And no opportunity to share printed photos with hundreds or thousands of people. As you normally only had 1 printed photo it was well within your control who saw it.

No it’s not.

if you ask for consent in any area that must be respected in my opinion. Otherwise it’s a slippery slope.

but you do you op and keep on taking your video. Because you are clearly going to and I don’t really know what the point of this thread was other than to stir up upset.

Personally I think some people are always going to film nowadays, so better to have an official video and share with parents, blurring out any faces that don’t give consent to be shared (which is a lot nowadays, probably at least a third).

Apart from anything else, other parent’s choices about their children’s image are not subservient to yours.

If someone doesn’t want their children filmed, not because of adoption or hiding, they just don’t, that’s their right.

My kid, my rules. You don’t get to override that.

Do you and your husband delete the video after you've shared it with your husband? If not anyone who gets access to your accounts including hackers have access to all those images and can do whatever they want with them including putting them online.
I really hope someone catches you as you will be banned from all events

Absolute Cunty Fucker (always prefer that to cheeky) perhaps we can have a new emoticon for complete self absorbed bellends

That's the thing about safeguarding.

It isn't fun. It isn't convenient. It isn't flexible. It isn't only applicable to certain people. And it most certainly, definitely, is NOT ABOUT YOU.

It doesn't matter if the chances of something bad happening as a result of your breaking the rules is extremely remote. Like driving at 35 in a 30 zone, or nipping through a red light when there's no-one else around, if something DID happen you wouldn't be able to live with yourself.

Get a grip - it's not about you, and your intentions. It's about CHILDREN'S SAFETY, and I'm sorry but that matters more than your entitlement.

OP: “Am I unreasonable to…..”

MAJORITY OF MUMSNET: “Absolutely unreasonable for all these very good reasons…”

OP: “but I’m special and don’t want to follow rules”

🤔

Do you not think anyone filming causes worry for the parents of the kids who really cannot be filmed? If they spot you, it reiterates that the school isn't a safe place for them, and those kids have already been through hell!

Absolute dick move. Pure parent entitlement.