Why do men hate women so much?

[growingsideway]

I’m on the larger side, a size 18. Walking back from work with my headphones in and on my phone and a guy leans out of his car window (passenger side) in slow moving traffic, barks at me like a dog and calls me a fat bitch. Him and his mates in the car then crack up at it and find themselves absolutely hilarious as they’re crawling along next to me.

I know it’s silly to be so upset by it because it’s such a silly thing for them to do, but they took me by surprise and gave me a fright and I just don’t get it. Why are men like this?

You can't have got out much in 'much of your life outside the UK.' It's beyond farcical to suggest that it's only men in the UK who behave like this. 🙄

I was 14 years old when I was first shouted at from a van and it took a while for me to realise they enjoyed my embarrassment. And that wasn't the only or last time.

Ultimately 30 years later I don't have much time for them either and strangely they don't enjoy that as much as they enjoyed embarrassing me.

I had remarks shouted at me from a van too when I was 14. It was 2004, a school trip and it was the ice cream man. I've never forgotten about it.

So one extreme view of all men isn’t nonsense, but another extreme saying the opposite isn’t nonsense. What a ridiculous statement.

I used to get upset when men behaved like this but I realised they are just some kind of undeveloped sub-species.

There are some amazing men out there (like my dh) but there is a group of them that are bascially brain damaged trolls. Their opinion means nothing to me as they are so far beneath me. Unfortunately like real trolls they can be large and dangerous. Shame we can't just collect them up and stick them in a zoo to study.

Il get a bashing for this but we need to stop with the hate of all men. They make up half the population they are obviously not all the same.

It’s not a view of all men it’s a view of men as a sex class.
The stats posters have linked on this thread speak for themselves.

Come on it’s not that difficult to understand.

The PP is speaking about people saying that all the men they know are lovely and wouldn't hurt women. You can’t possibly know that.

My DM didn't have a clue as to that my F (her H) was sexually abusing her DDs. I didn't know that my DSis’s exH was being physically abusive towards her until after they split up. Or that my friend’s H was the sort of man who would be sexually abused her DD.

And you are a man!

Women are scared of men as a sex class for good reason.

You cannot deny most women will take precautions and change their behaviour to accommodate the threat of men’s behaviour as a sex class.

We don’t know which ones are bad but we do know that men as a sex class pose a danger to us.

The statistics of 1 in 4 women being raped or sexually assaulted by men as a sex class is good reason for us having to try and protect ourselves from men as a sex class.

I keep writing 'men as a sex class' so no one can respond with not all men!

98% of violent crime is committed by men as a sex class.

Someone once asked me what I would do differently if there was a genuine curfew and men were not allowed out after dark. I felt a sense of freedom and liberation just thinking about the fact I could go for a run in the park through the bushes and trees and not have any sense of high alert.

I could walk home or take an empty train home late at night and relax without being on high alert.

I could relax while my 16 year DD was out in the evening with her friends and not worry that she might come home as another rape victim statistic.

For all those saying not all men you are missing the point. Men as a sex class are the issue. Women as a sex class pose little or no danger and cannot rape.
That is not an opinion it is a fact.

I agree but there are posters on here saying that those of us who have good men in our lives are lying and that they are out doing horrible stuff behind our backs. That is why we are saying not all men.

Had a woman call my friend a fat bitch the other day for no reason so honestly not at all. There’s just horrible people in the world. Sorry this happened to you

When most posters and the OP talk about ‘men’ they are referring to men as a sex class. When people respond specifically about individual men they know you have to expect people will respond again referring to men as a sex class because that is what this thread is about.

I don’t think anyone is saying that the perceived good men in your life are definitely not good men, they are saying that many perceived good men are actually not.

I think they are highlighting the fact that statistically due to the sheer volume of assaults/rapes and regular misogynistic behaviour women encounter in their lifetime that most of the perpetrators will not be known as perpetrators to most of the people close to them.

I think when things like this happen we need to start taking a photo of the number plate and reporting them to the police. Cat calling is illegal as so is harassment.

When they start holding each other to the standards they hold women to, I'll maybe have some truck with 'not all men'.

Some of us are lying. Some of us are in denial. Some of us are deluded. Some of us are lucky. Very few of us have-or know-men who will call out other men on their behaviour.

I agree.
I think the majority of men do not engage in the sort of active abuse of women as described by the OP. However, equally the majority would not intervene to stop it. This majority group includes men who behave in a range of ways, from laughing along with the perpetrators (because they think its funny or feel social pressure to pretend to) to ignoring it as nothing to do with them, to maybe a bit of an eye roll. Some may be embarrassed and not like the behaviour and maybe make excuses to avoid travelling with the perpetrator in future.
However none of these make the slightest positive difference to the woman victim, who simply sees a group of men and hears the insults and laughter and assumes a group of men are abusing her.
It also makes no difference to the behaviour of the perpetrator who will have no reason to think other men disapprove of him.
So while NAMALT, I'm not sure it makes much difference if the ones who are NLT don't actively distinguish themselves from those who are.

As someone who always thought 'my OH wouldn't behave like that', only to discover when push came to shove that he would, I have actually come to believe that most men are basically quite unpleasant.
Some of them, thank goodness, have the ability to control their words and actions so that they can form good relationships and contribute positively to society. However, I do believe that without the constraints of society and expectations, most men would be driven by their own desires and selfishness.
They are mostly controlled by their dicks

@brunettemic

So one extreme view of all men isn’t nonsense, but another extreme saying the opposite isn’t nonsense.

Well yes actually. To say nearly all men have these tendencies in them to be disrespectful towards women - even cruel and nasty, is NOT an extreme view. It's a fact.

To say many men are not like this, now that is extreme, because it's simply not true. Most men have misogynism rooted very deeply into them. Some are blatantly vile and sexist quite openly, some keep it hidden quite well. Even the 'good ones' have it in them.

Again you're very naive and blinkered if you think any different. (Or you have met very few men!)

100% this. Well said. As I said, the majority of men (if not all) have deep rooted misogyny in them, and are capable of treating women like shit, attacking them, being rude and nasty to them, thinking they're above them, and getting angry when women do well and achieve things. And they think women should be the primary carer for the children, and should put THEIR career and life on hold to raise the children... (Whilst they fuck off out and do what they want without their life changing one bit! Spending family money, carrying on with their 'hobbies' and still wanting sex with the mother of their children, within days of her giving birth..)

I envy (the few) women who think none of this is true, because clearly they have not experienced any nastiness from men. They will do though, one day.........

This thread has reminded me of the time when I was walking along the street with my brother, as young adults, and he asked me to walk behind him. He said he didn't want his mates seeing us together "in case they think you're my girlfriend and think you're the best I can do". I always thought he was one of the better ones, up till that point.

There are two men who I know are not like this at all, my DH and one of my my DBILs (my DSis’s second DH). They have been wonderful, the way they’ve supported my DSis and me as we’ve processed the memories of our historical CSA, right through a traumatic police investigation.

As for the other men I know and like, I won’t ever be sure as I've been wrong before.

I’m lucky.

I asked my DH about when he goes on golf breaks with a big group of friend if any of them ever give women grief etc and he was adamant that they don’t. He said they’re all just so happy to be away for a few days playing golf and having a few beers at night. DH always crosses the road if he’s walking behind a woman who is alone especially in the dark. So many men don’t do this and walk right behind you.

The “most men” bit is complete nonsense. Some men yes, most men no.

As for your derogatory remarks about me, having lived on various different places across the country I’m safe in the knowledge that you’re wrong and laughing away at your assumption. Pretty pathetic really.

@brunettemic

Did you read these stats?

Do you really think these statistics can be a minority of men?