Why do men hate women so much?

[growingsideway]

I’m on the larger side, a size 18. Walking back from work with my headphones in and on my phone and a guy leans out of his car window (passenger side) in slow moving traffic, barks at me like a dog and calls me a fat bitch. Him and his mates in the car then crack up at it and find themselves absolutely hilarious as they’re crawling along next to me.

I know it’s silly to be so upset by it because it’s such a silly thing for them to do, but they took me by surprise and gave me a fright and I just don’t get it. Why are men like this?

@Sexentric

Government stats record that on average 79800 women across England and Wales are raped or sexually assaulted every year.

It also estimates 5 in 6 women don’t report for obvious reasons.

So if we times the 79800 by 6 we can deduce that 478800 women are sexually assaulted or raped each year in England and Wales.

478800 women in 1 year!

478800 is only rapes and sexual assault vistims.
It doesn’t include the men verbally abusing out of a car window or any other intimidating behaviour towards women.
It doesn’t include murders or any other kind of non sexually assault.
It doesn’t include upskirting or online abuse.

Please share your stats that show it’s only ‘a minority of men’ that are a problem for women.

But decent men don't need defending. They know who they are.

They don't need us to confirm their existence in every conversation where another man is awful.

Sorry OP, what a horrid experience

I find decent men generally are extremely suspicious and cynical about other men’s motives. Know DH is anyway. Because they know what actually goes on when women aren’t there. Often women are hopelessly naive about men. As evidenced by posters on this thread.

Yes, my DH and bills and a couple of close male friends would respond like that, too. Quite clearly there are decent nen like your DS.

But decent men don't need women to defend them on a thread like this where women are sharing the traumatic experiences they have been through at the hands of men.

And there’s no doubting that it really isn't a small minority of men who treat women like that.

Why? because we are driven by different biological hormones and men and women will always be "Mars v Venus". Humans are a mammal species in the animal kingdom with a higher brain development but still biologically linked to our species.

Men's testosterone made them fighters and abusers, while women's estrogen made us kinder and focussed on our children. It's how society developed from nearthentals, thru ages, countries and cultures. Men dominated, made laws and subjugated women because of their biological aggression.

The problem is today. Women work, have their own finances and are postponing having children or having none. Men can hate us and kills us, but our societies have a huge issue with women waking up to men's abusive nature.

@Kimura

You said upthread that the Gisele Pelicot attackers were from a dark corner of the internet.

You’ve not read the coverage and / or you’ve misunderstood the point of the post you replied to.

After the trial, it was confirmed that of the men convicted, “Most lived within a 50-km (31-mile) radius of the Pelicots’ picturesque village of Mazan’. And that “Many of these men … lived within 20 kilometres from Pelicot’s village, Mazan.”

The poster’s reason for raising that specific case was that it shows how many men in a random area would be willing to sexually assault / rape if given the opportunity, unless you believe that specific area of France just happens to have a staggeringly greater than average amount of those men.

It was a terrifying case for so many reasons but one of the most unsettling elements for me was that it showed what a high number of men would do that if presented with the opportunity.

You say this but please look at statistics.

98% of sex crimes are committed by men.

At least 80% of violent crime is committed by women.

Yes an individual woman could be just as nasty as an individual man but as a sex class there is no denying that men are doing ‘nastier’ things than women by a huge, huge margin.

This is their mentality.

“Can be just as bad.” Individually maybe. But they aren’t, as a sex class. Are they? Look at the stats. This is reality.

98% of sex crimes are committed by men.

At least 80% of violent crime is committed by men.

Yes an individual woman could be just as nasty as an individual man but as a sex class there is no denying that men are doing more ‘bad’ things than women by a huge, huge margin.

80% of violent crime committed by men that should say, obviously!

80% of violent crime committed by men that should say, obviously!

It never ceases to amaze me that so many men call larger women names and think that it is not only funny,but original too. Fucking morons,the lot of them.

I wish the concept of class analysis was more widely understood. It would make threads like this so much easier and shorter.

One notable incident sticks in my mind. It was when my son was a baby. I had popped to Tescos and he was strapped in his car seat in the back. I made a mistake, and went up one of the parking lanes the wrong way; I didn't realise.

Parked my car, lifted him out and put him in the trolley. All good. Turned round, to see a really angry man leaning out of his van window, I mean, really incandescent with rage. Called me a fucking stupid bitch, told me I knew exactly what I was doing, said he'd fucking knock me the fuck out. I literally ran with baby into the store, him following me all the way up the lane swearing his head off. I was shaking. To say I was frightened would be the understatement of the year. I asked staff security to walk back with me on the way out, which they gladly did.

I was so so scared - I've not felt fear like it, scared because he was clearly insane and violent and because I had a baby to protect. I was easy pickings - a young mum with a baby, I'm not going to fight back, I can't do anything, I was clearly just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Exactly. Sorry but the “not all men” posters
come across as quite thick.

Tiny that’s awful so sorry. Had a funny one tiny car park could not fit in the space. Twat in car shouting and yelling at me. I capitulated and let him have the space. He then couldn’t park in it either. Oh how I laughed as he sped off in a fury of testirical anger!

Oh and now, my sons are both older. They would never, ever treat a woman like that, or like the men who hassled OP. They are considerate, kind young men who understand their moral responsibilities.

It may not be literally every man, but it's far too many men. And of the ones who wouldn't initiate horrible abusive behaviour like this, far too few are willing or confident enough to tell those who do it to stop being arseholes.

I suppose it's somewhat to be expected that the confident, loud, rude men who set out to control women (as a sex and as individuals) through abuse also tend to control and dominate other men disproportionately.

If only society could find better ways to recognise and promote positive, thoughtful masculinity instead of constantly promoting toxic male aggression as something admirable, and those who exhibit it as leaders.

@TheaBrandt1 Thanks and yes, I was honestly so bloomin' scared! I often think back to that incident, and I wonder, if I had been a man with a baby in the trolley, would he have threatened me like that? No, of course he wouldn't!

I was on a packed train recently. All seats taken. Young mum gets on with tiny baby in sling and pull along struggling to manoeuvre along aisle. Not one man moved or responded (all ages). I was only one that gave my seat sorted out her pull along storage. Chivalry is dead it’s been replaced with mum power.

So many men are so angry and easier to target women plus sense of entitlement

its too many man I am sick of the narrative its not all men defence, its too many and what are all these nice men doing about it mainly fuck all as it doesn't impact them

its really hard parenting a boy as a single mother trying to navigate this as my influence becomes less and less

Gawd, I got on a packed train recently and it was full of drunk football fans, there was one particular bloke who saw fit to comment on every woman who got on the train and particularly zeroed in on a young blonde woman and made an incredibly crude comment to her about ejaculating on her face.

I stood in front of her and told him to do one and spoke to her for the rest of the journey. When we got off the train he said he was sorry I was a lesbian. I told him to fuck off immediately or I'd get the transport police. Young woman & I walked out if the station and had a nice chat.

He was about 6' 4"and seemed to think he could say whatever he chose to women. Dick.

I'm not scared of blokes like that.

I think some of them are angry and feel they can take it out on women as we won't fight back. Or they do/say things simply because they know there will be no repercussions.

I've had a man shout "out the way you lazy bitch" at me when we were both cycling and I was heavily pregnant, just because.

DH's brother groped me when we were having a big family photo taken. I wasn't going to spoil the photo being taken was I?

Apologies if someone else got there first, but there’s a passage in Doris Lessing’s The Summer Before the Dark (1973) that describes something similar. The main character (middle-aged) walks past a group of builders in an ill-fitting dress with “normal” gait, and there’s no reaction - the blokes ignore her, she’s invisible. She nips round the corner, cinches the baggy dress with a scarf, covers her frizzy, roots-growing-out hair with another scarf, adopts a bit of a sashay, and instantly gets comments and wolf whistles. Same old.
The difference seems to be that from being invisible, we’ve become targets - bins for men to dispose of their brain detritus, and they think it’s OK to do that.

My brother hates women. Really hates them. He blames us all for his lot in life ( which is actually quite privileged, or was) he’s lost and lonely and a drunk but that’s not his fault, that’s our fault apparently. Years ago, when he did once have a girlfriend he spent the whole time telling her how to dress and not to wear makeup. I literally have no idea why he turned out this way, my father was so far removed from this. A charismatic, women- loving, warm and very intelligent man. The only thing I can think of is private school left my brother broken. There’s a lot of hate and rage in him and woe is me. We don’t speak because I don’t want my children around him.