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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be upset by this in a friends group chat?

177 replies

alittlechildish · 14/12/2025 16:32

I’m well aware that this will sound silly, but here goes.

i’m in a group chat with some other women of a similar age as me. We all met because we are fans of a sport. Last weekend that sport concluded and the competitor that I’m not a huge fan of won. No big deal, I’m an adult and I can cope with it.

One member of the group chat was @ ing me through the entire day, basically asking if I was really annoyed, am I pissed off etc etc and just being a bit weird.

i said no not really and left it at that. I went onto the shared document we have of addresses in preparation to send my Christmas cards and I can see that this person has now added comments to my address. It’s my name then (stinks) and under my address they’ve put shithole. From the edit history I can see that this was done by the member who was acting strangely last weekend and was done on the day of the last race.

AIBU to think this is weird behaviour and also a little upsetting? We’re all adults and it just seems strange.

OP posts:
Floorclean · 14/12/2025 16:33

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

butterdish93 · 14/12/2025 16:34

Hahaha I mean it’s funny but yes upsetting.
the thing is, she probably doesn’t realise that when she’s changed it, everyone can view her edited version. She likely did it for her personal amusement which is what makes it so petty and amusing

HollyhockDays · 14/12/2025 16:34

The @-ingwould be annoying. The address tbing is really weird though. Can you call them out on the chat.

Is it F1?

crazeekat · 14/12/2025 16:37

Call it out. Make it known u have seen it and I know who has written it. So childish and yes hurtful.

FuzzyWolf · 14/12/2025 16:37

I’d screen shot so the details of who amended it show, then tag @everyone on WhatsApp and say, I’ve washed recently and still have the same address but DM me if you need the details.

Original poster
alittlechildish · 14/12/2025 16:38

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Ha, I don’t know how else to word it. Like it’s a sport, I’m not bothered the second I turn it off. But apparently she is!

OP posts:
Motnight · 14/12/2025 16:38

Call them out on it.

bestbefore · 14/12/2025 16:38

I could call her out on it in the group. What a weird bullying thing to do!

Floorclean · 14/12/2025 16:38

i said no not really

so “not really”

but leaves it hanging that maybe a…. Little bit peeved!

DuchessDandelion · 14/12/2025 16:39

This time of year really brings the unhinged lot of the woodwork!

Op I'd screenshot it and post it to the group with the comment "did someone's 8 year old get bored?"

ChangeIsDue · 14/12/2025 16:39

I'd call it out too. She's put it on a group chat that everyone can see. I think I'd just ask her on the group if she meant for everyone to see.

sprigatito · 14/12/2025 16:39

Is she a binge drinker? That’s the only explanation I can think of for such deranged behaviour. I would post a screenshot of the amended name and address in the group chat with “ahem” and a laughing emoji. Weirdo.

Original poster
alittlechildish · 14/12/2025 16:39

Floorclean · 14/12/2025 16:38

i said no not really

so “not really”

but leaves it hanging that maybe a…. Little bit peeved!

Well yeah, I’d rather the team I supported won but they didn’t and that’s life 😂

OP posts:
Scottishskifun · 14/12/2025 16:39

crazeekat · 14/12/2025 16:37

Call it out. Make it known u have seen it and I know who has written it. So childish and yes hurtful.

This and make sure you put we are all grown women I don't see how this is appropriate....

MotherofPufflings · 14/12/2025 16:40

Utterly bizarre and childish behaviour. I'm not sure there is much to be gained from reacting to it, I'd just ignore and give her a wide berth from now on

Sidebeforeself · 14/12/2025 16:40

If it bothers you say something! And also .. just say it’s F1….

ChangeIsDue · 14/12/2025 16:41

Floorclean · 14/12/2025 16:38

i said no not really

so “not really”

but leaves it hanging that maybe a…. Little bit peeved!

The OP's response is perfectly harmless. It's the goady person who tagged her that has the problem.

Taweofterror · 14/12/2025 16:41

Floorclean · 14/12/2025 16:38

i said no not really

so “not really”

but leaves it hanging that maybe a…. Little bit peeved!

What are you trying to get at?

I assume this friend likes a bit of 'hilarious' 'banter' around sports teams. I would continue to just ignore her and hopefully she'll get the message that this isn't really your kind of humour.

Whatsthatsheila · 14/12/2025 16:41

alittlechildish · 14/12/2025 16:32

I’m well aware that this will sound silly, but here goes.

i’m in a group chat with some other women of a similar age as me. We all met because we are fans of a sport. Last weekend that sport concluded and the competitor that I’m not a huge fan of won. No big deal, I’m an adult and I can cope with it.

One member of the group chat was @ ing me through the entire day, basically asking if I was really annoyed, am I pissed off etc etc and just being a bit weird.

i said no not really and left it at that. I went onto the shared document we have of addresses in preparation to send my Christmas cards and I can see that this person has now added comments to my address. It’s my name then (stinks) and under my address they’ve put shithole. From the edit history I can see that this was done by the member who was acting strangely last weekend and was done on the day of the last race.

AIBU to think this is weird behaviour and also a little upsetting? We’re all adults and it just seems strange.

its very strange. Screenshot it and the edit history and send it into the group and say … really?? This is your idea of appropriate adult behaviour?

she’ll either be ostracised and kicked out for being a tw@t, nothing will happen and you accept it, or you go “fuck this shit, I’m not dealing with this immature behaviour” and leave…. because let’s be honest - with friends like that who needs enemies 🤷‍♀️

its nothing more than petty bullying and the only way you will get around it is calling her out or walking away. She’s obviously gunning for a reaction and ignoring it will probably just escalate.

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 14/12/2025 16:42

That’s so fucking weird.

Whyst · 14/12/2025 16:43

butterdish93 · 14/12/2025 16:34

Hahaha I mean it’s funny but yes upsetting.
the thing is, she probably doesn’t realise that when she’s changed it, everyone can view her edited version. She likely did it for her personal amusement which is what makes it so petty and amusing

How is it funny?

agathacrisps · 14/12/2025 16:43

That’s unhinged behaviour. Can you imagine a circumstance where you would do it? Of course not. True nutter territory. I’d screenshot and post saying this is weird behaviour, do you think someone is mentally unstable?

DillyDallyingAllDay · 14/12/2025 16:44

Everything up to the point of insinuating you live in a shithole I’d put down to banter; that for me, is a step too far. I’d do what PPs have suggested and call it out.

Floorclean · 14/12/2025 16:45

alittlechildish · 14/12/2025 16:39

Well yeah, I’d rather the team I supported won but they didn’t and that’s life 😂

Show quote history

You should have said that then! Be unequivocal.

Rather than “no not really” to her barrage which is a bit wishy washy

GreenGiant167 · 14/12/2025 16:47

Definitely call them out on it and report back on here 🙏 If I’d done something like that, I’d be so mortified that the person had seen it 😂 Surely, it’s just too delicious an opportunity to miss out on!