To have asked my parents for a lift home?

[coldabdtired]

I’m 25, and live at home with my parents. I drive but use public transport for work because it’s cheaper than parking.

tonight the bus home is delayed by 45 minutes. I worked 9-6:30, I was hoping to get on the 7:15 bus but it won’t be at my stop till 8.

i texted my family chat saying I know it’s cheeky but was anyone able to give me a lift if I walked to a different stop and got on a different bus because it was cold and I left the house before 7. My mum has come back and said that I’ve been really selfish to ask as they’re in their pyjamas but they’re going to feel guilty for saying no now because they know I’m tired and cold.

AIBU to have asked? I never ask for lifts anywhere, I drive or get the bus.

Mean of them

I regularly give my daughter (25) a lift to and from the bus station/wherever. She doesn’t like the bus because it’s often full of people she doesn’t feel safe around, she’s small and nervous, and it’s often dark outside.

I recently did a 50 mile round trip to pick her up and bring her home when she had flu - because I didn’t want her on the bus feeling so unwell (or spreading it to other people).

I don’t mind doing it and I usually have time to do it (and I like driving). Sometimes, I say no, though 😃

Hopefully, she’ll pass her driving test soon…

My Dad would have come to get me, and I’m in my 40s and don’t live at home!

15 minutes there, and 15 back. The bus is still 35 minutes away, apparently there’s been a few bad accidents today and the traffic is horrendous (to clarify, not from my house to where they’d be meeting me)

They’re being very mean.

Next time they need a favour think twice about it. I’d suck up the cost and use my car, especially over winter.

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

That’s pretty rotten of them. Hope you get home soon OP x

I think they are being mean.

But you can make things better for yourself. When you brother is out, switch if your phone. Or put it in do not disturb.

So tell them that...... your taxi is now closed for business.

So stop those lifts right now.

I would have chucked my coat on and gone and got my DS25.

Wow. I’d probably be collecting you most days!

That's sad OP, my dd is 24 and we would do it at a drop of a hat.

I have two DS in their twenties, if they ever ask for a lift I'm pleased and I love going out to fetch them! Of course they are grateful, always says thank you. But why wouldn't anyone want to get their kids? If I'm in PJs I'll put a coat over them.

I absolutely would have come gotten you. Probably even offered to come get you from where you are, unless it was like an hour away. That’s what you do for family.

Bit mean - I'd turf out to help you (not like you'd need to get dressed, just get in the car in PJs)

Honestly, saying that you made them feel bad for not doing it is a massive red flag to me - my ex was of the opinion that me pointing out he'd upset me (eg. by forgetting my 40th birthday) was worse than him doing whatever it was that upset me - so anyone blaming me for their feelings about a totally reasonable request sets the alarm bells ringing.

Match their energy. They couldn't bothered to help you out on a miserable day, you need to step back and be in your PJs when they need lifts. I think that I'd have had a glass of wine too, so it's totally impossible (whether or not I'd actually had a glass of wine)

In that case even I would probably get you.

Im 37 and my parents would be there in a heartbeat (I would also do the same for them).

Selfish and fucking nasty too

I would stay in your pjs next time dad wants a lift and tell your brother uber is a thing

Your mum blames you for not being telepathic, and then guilts you by making you responsible for her feelings. I know which I consider to be the selfish one.

They're being mean especially if you give them regular lifts.

Tbh even if I was in my PJs, I'd have whacked on a coat and my crocs and drove to get you - as I have done for my DCs a few times over the years! They no longer live at home- one lives 2 hours away and I weirdly miss being the one they call in this type of situation.

Why are they in pjs at 7pm? Do they work early shift and have to be up at 4?

If they have normal hours, they're just lazy, that's awful

Of course, you are not BU to ask, all the kids I know do ask - whatever their age. Sometimes parents say yes, sometimes no. it's no drama. Your parents are a little bit unkind and selfish, are they very elderly?

Stop all these lifts, they can bloody well get taxis or give each other lifts!

They’re both retired. To be fair we very much are a “PJs as soon as your day is done” family but I’d pop a coat on to come out!