AIBU to be fed up of defending my choice to use formula

[Sequinbow]

I just want a bit of a rant, I’m fed up of having to defend formula feeding my little girl. She is 5 months old and thriving 💓 she absolutely loves her bottle and it’s wonderful to feed her she’s happy and content.

but….

I’ve had a stranger tell me (whilst I was feeding my LO) ‘breast is best’ and i should try harder to breast feed. I’ve also had colleagues and other mums pointing out ‘oh you’re not breastfeeding’ when I get her bottle out and asking why im not breast feeding.

There is a lot of chat in the mums WhatsApp group about how they are beside themselves to make the decision to bring in one bottle per day of formula to top up their supply and how they need to come to terms with it etc I find myself wanting to defend formula feeding my baby. And it’s the implication that my little girl is at a disadvantage because of me, her mum.
I wonder what do they think of me if they’re so caught up with adding just one bottle of formula when I exclusively formula fed.

im really fed up of having to defend my choices and having to provide a reason for formula feeding. I feel looked down on for formula feeding my daughter x

You can’t go back and start BF now, so let it go.

I would have been tempted to tell that person to fuck off. You might also be best to leave that WhatsApp group to be honest. My kids are fine and healthy with formula.

You don't have to justify your milk choices to anyone, the person committing was rude and sanctimonious. Just feed your baby and ignore the "noise" they don't matter.

If you were breastfeeding you’d be getting comments about that too - are you sure baby’s getting enough, they’d sleep better if you gave them a bottle, aren’t they getting too big for that now, don’t you want someone else to feed them so you can get a break…

This is firmly in the category of things we do as women where whatever we choose it’s wrong. It’s frustrating all round. You made your choice, you’re happy with it, best to let comments wash over you

There is a lot of chat in the mums WhatsApp group about how they are beside themselves to make the decision to bring in one bottle per day of formula to top up their supply and how they need to come to terms with it etc I find myself wanting to defend formula feeding my baby. And it’s the implication that my little girl is at a disadvantage because of me, her mum.
I wonder what do they think of me if they’re so caught up with adding just one bottle of formula when I exclusively formula fed.
There's a lot of projecting you're doing there. I breastfed. There was a lot of talk about it in my NCT WhatsApp group and I would have been gutted if I'd had to introduce formula because that was how I felt about it for myself. Doesn't mean I or anyone else looked down on anyone choosing to formula feed.

You can tell people who directly comment that it's none of their business, but you can't object to other people discussing what they want for their babies. You must have known when you decided to formula feed that there's a huge amount of scientific evidence supporting the fact that breastmilk is a better food for babies than formula, but you had your reasons for choosing not to. You can't expect people to pretend formula is equal now.

I was exclusively formula fed when it was the norm.
25 years later I was being criticised for breastfeeding too often/for too long.
You can’t win. Ignore the comments.

Sorry what am I projecting ? Genuinely what point are you making?

Ignore them. The vast majority of us don't get a choice about formula feeding for one reason or another. If they are small minded enough to comment, that is on them. My babies would have starved if I hadn't formula fed.

I breastfed, for far longer than the norm, and let me tell you a LOT of women make breastfeeding their entire identity, almost an ideology. They tend to be competitive types who are determined to make motherhood their ‘career’ and get their validation from making others feel bad.

Give them a hard swerve!

I always bottle fed (years ago, through choice). Both children were and are fine. Both nearly 50 now.

Feed what’s best for you. 👍

I’m not upset with the WhatsApp mums breastfeeding 😵‍💫 I’m trying to make the point that no mum should beat themselves up for introducing formula

I bf both of mine with some formula top up due to CMPA. The comments and pressure around 5-6 months to switch to formula was huge. The pressure around how you feed your baby in this country is huge. And all it does is cause guilt.

So it’s ok to judge mothers in public, literal strangers, to their faces?!!

You sound like someone who would think it’s ok for men to wolf whistle at a woman for wearing a mini skirt, after all what do you expect….

Have you purposefully ignored my post to make this point?

Other mums feeling worried about their own choice to introduce formula has nothing to do with you and isn’t a judgement on you, it’s about their feeding journey and what’s best for their baby, so it’s pointless putting that on yourself.

I had shitty comments with my baby who I formula fed, and shitty looks and comments with my baby I breastfed also, this judgement unfortunately can happen no matter how you feed your baby. Just ignore others and do what’s right for you

Why? It is a pretty good alternative and has saved countless babies from dying.

Thank you ☺️

Honestly, do what works best for you. I breastfed one and bottle fed the other. One has serious allergies and both have auto immune conditions. So breast feeding doesn’t always equal healthy child.

That you are projecting other women talking about not wanting personally to ff into criticism of you. It isn't.

You don't have to justify anything, there's nothing wrong with formula. If anyone says differently just ignore them. 💐

YABU, you don’t have to defend formula feeding.

Stranger bothering you about breastfeeding- unaccaptable

What’s happening in the WhatsApp group, which is nothing to do with you- is you projecting

You are allowed to formula feed your baby if you want

Other mothers are allowed to be a bit put out about formula top ups (although breastfeeding advice is so poor in this country and I’d wonder if it was even bloody necessary)

THE END

Ugh it’s the ‘must know’ comment…..sums your attitude up.

Sorry I meant commenting !