To refuse to be a witness against colleague??

[Pukkajones]

Christmas party, a few nights ago. At a hotel, as it was timed with a big sales meeting, so everyone staying over, 200 ish people, free bar as well as a formal dinner.
Drinking very much encouraged. Staff ages ranged from early 20s to the senior staff in their 50s. Everyone VERY merry.
One colleague, let’s call her Jenny, got a bit carried away, throwing shapes on the dance floor, too touchy feely with men and women apparently then groped one older male colleagues testicles at which point friends grabbed hold of her and steered her off up stairs to her room.
She escaped. Came back down - paralytic at this point - and flashed her boobs at a senior male colleague! In the side bar area so fewer people around me being one of them. Another colleague and I intervened and friends got her again and put her to bed, this time someone stayed with her.

Now I’m being asked to come and tell what I saw to her line manager. I’m in training for an event at the moment so it’s common knowledge that I wasn’t drinking and was sober.

I really don’t want to. She’s lovely, usually quiet and sensible, the company got her poleaxed and now want to carpet her. I’m not a bloody snitch plus - why can’t the guy she flashed at say what happened. Why do I need to be involved???

I’ve been working away since the party so have no idea what is being said in office other than the OMG, Jenny! What was she doing??? Messages. But trust me, there’s plenty of stories from that night… so she’s in good company.

YABU - snitch on her. A man doing that would be in so much trouble.

YANBU - deny seeing anything. If the company ply everyone with that much booze there’s bound to be uncouth behaviour and they probably have enough witnesses already.

This has to be one of the worse threads I’ve ever read on here.

You lied and let a sexual abuser get away with it.

You're disgusting, almost as bad as the person who sexually assaulted her colleague.

Serve her right if she does, frankly. She needs a wake up call.

Anyone reporting a colleague purely for drunkenly showing her bra at a Christmas party must really have very little else to occupy them.

I didn't say I didn't mind being groped, but I saw it within the context it happened, viz normally nice, decent people who were absolutely blootered (as we say in Scotland) and all of whom subsequently apologised profusely when sober. It is not something I would have wanted to raise officially because I considered no real harm was done. I would not have wanted someone to have a blemished employment record over it that's all. As I said other opinions are available. I am not telling anyone else what to do, just sharing my perfectly valid opinion based on my own experiences. I never claimed to "speak for everyone" 🙄

Incidentally I was also sexually assaulted by a guest at my sister's wedding. In this case the culprit - a cousin's husband, was known as a sex pest and was not drunk. I took an entirely different view of that as that bastard knew exactly what he was doing. There is often nuance in life everything is not always black and white.

Let she who is without sin cast the first stone.

You sound an absolute joy. Are you a traffic warden?

Seriously?? A woman flashed her bra. Get an actual grip!

If a man pulled down his trousers to flash his boxers would that be okay?

All the OP saw was her flashing her bra ffs. Anything else was subsequent gossip!

At a drunken party? Yes seen it several times. Everyone laughed and that was it. Why all the fucking drama?

I doubt she was under any legal obligation to shop a colleague she thought hadn't done anything that serious. It's not like she was under caution by the police.

That's still not okay.

Sounds you have low standards for acceptable behaviour.

According to the OP's original post, she flashed her boobs, not her bra.

You were joking?

She flashed her boobs, not her bra according to the OP's original post.

In your opinion. Other opinions are available. I don't think it's a big deal and neither does anyone else I've asked about this thread irl.

As I keep saying - fucking context!! Wouldn't be acceptable at the supermarket for example but at a drunken adult party - so what!

Edit my bad - it did say she flashed her boobs but the OP subsequently clarified the said boobs were not naked.

Actually she didn't say WHAT she flashed.

She said boobs in the first post.

No.

The other opinions are wrong. Even when I've been drunk and merry I still have some self respect and decorum. I know how to behave. Then again I don't drink anymore.

Also flashing a bra also means you can see the breasts as well given that is what they hold.

Am I missing something or not read posts but the main issue did OP see colleague grab man’s crotch or not. That’s sexual assault and the genders not relevant.

Well he'd be in good company on this thread where someone needs to be marched naked through the streets having shit thrown at them with a jeering mob screaming "shame" to atone for their misdemeanors.

Why? He was sexually assaulted and told the staff who removed her ASAP. Had he slapped a girls behind nobody would have gone and said it was okay.

No she didn't.

What is wrong with you?

My opinion is not "wrong". Your opinion is not "wrong" we simply disagree. People as Alastair Campbell famously said "can disagree agreeably"

Give it a try before you die.