To tell our daughter we can’t manage the childcare anymore?

[five5five]

Our daughter 43 has 3 children the older two are in primary school and when she returned to work I did say I would have the girls while she worked to save with costs.
This was 10 years ago and while I have kept to my promise she now has another baby and I don’t think I am the best person to be looking after a baby.
I will be 80 next year and my husband has mobility difficulties and early onset dementia so I am also caring for him so it’s only me who really looks after them but I know she relies on me as childcare will cripple them.
I was very happy to have them when I offered and I don’t want to sound like I’m dropping her now with a baby but the older girls are in school so I only need to pick them up and have them here a couple of hours but we are older now and I am starting to feel it and really I’m finding it a lot and a baby is a lot more work than a 6 and 10.
I also have other grandchildren I look after although not on a regular basis so more as and when needed so sometimes I have had all 6 in.
AIBU to go back on my offer now there is 3 as I don’t honestly think I am the best choice of care for a baby and I would struggle full time.
I know it doesn’t suit my husband to have a baby around the house all day.

this is ridiculous you are looking after a toddler all week. Why did you ever say yes. My MIL has our toddler 1 day, shes 72 and even that I think is a bit of a struggle for her. It’s your daughter’s choice to have 3 kids, she needs to pay for childcare.

Did your daughter actually ask you if you would be OK to look after a baby? If she can't afford child care she really shouldn't have have had a 3rd baby. As, surely, at 80, she shouldn't have thought she could rely on you for child care. Are you in a position to help her fund child care? ( not your position to but you could deduct from inheritance?)

I remember this thread, the OP disappeared early on but ai would love to know what happened and if she spoke to the daughter.