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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I’m so so upset about this!

283 replies

Penny4thoughts1 · 07/12/2025 10:39

I am struggling money wise after a tough few years (or 5 years really) but I was never well off. A few weeks ago I asked my dsis if I could borrow 500quid to sort Christmas and I would pay her back. She said she didn’t have it. I thought fair enough she must have had some crazy expenses as she has two dc etc. but her and he4 do both work v good jobs. Anyway I’ve made do.
cut to this weekend…I’m so upset. She asked me if I would babysit for them for the night. (Paid, as she knows I’m broke) after her dc had gone to bed I had a bath. I was running the bath and found he4 shampoos, brands I have never really seen or used. I googled them. 25quid a bottle!!!
then to top it off I was looking for a match to light a candle as I had tidied the kitchen this morning and in the drawer was a quote for a new car being ordered for January. 500 quid deposit and cash payment due of 25k.
she did have the money she just didn’t want to lend!? Why didn’t she just say? They are due home in an hour and I just want to cry. The live in a brand new house! Furniture is new… everything is perfect and beautiful. I’m just so heartbroken that she couldn’t share 500 with her only sister, they are clearly way more well off than I even thought! Should I say anything! I wasn’t snooping by the way.

OP posts:
LemonDrizzleKay · 08/12/2025 20:09

Many years ago, when we were young, I asked my sister for a loan. She was working and I wasn't. She was so awful about it, made me feel so small. I told her at the time that perhaps one day the tables might turn and she might need my help. Sure enough, that is exactly what happened, but I was much nicer to her than she had been to me. I don't think she even remembers how awful she was. I guess I should have refused to help her as she had done with me, but I didn't because I didn't want to be like her.

Frenchfrychic · 08/12/2025 20:28

Edit

Frenchfrychic · 08/12/2025 20:29

LemonDrizzleKay · 08/12/2025 20:09

Many years ago, when we were young, I asked my sister for a loan. She was working and I wasn't. She was so awful about it, made me feel so small. I told her at the time that perhaps one day the tables might turn and she might need my help. Sure enough, that is exactly what happened, but I was much nicer to her than she had been to me. I don't think she even remembers how awful she was. I guess I should have refused to help her as she had done with me, but I didn't because I didn't want to be like her.

That didn’t happen did it,

banksshaina · 09/12/2025 13:57

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banksshaina · 09/12/2025 13:58

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Ladybyrd · 09/12/2025 14:55

Oh my god - what is wrong with you? You shouldn’t have asked and you certainly shouldn’t be begrudging her spending money on what she wants to. It’s not a small amount here - it’s £500. I wouldn’t ask my sibling to lend me a fiver!

ohnotthisagain2020 · 09/12/2025 21:49

Frenchfrychic · 08/12/2025 20:29

That didn’t happen did it,

Brings this to mind (waiting for image to come through)

justpassmethemouse · 09/12/2025 22:34

If it helps - because I do empathise - apparently the posh shampoos last much longer than the regular supermarket shampoos as you need much less per wash. It could be a case of “investing in quality”.

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