Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DH and a colleague

331 replies

Th8754 · 05/12/2025 22:39

Our teenage daughter is misbehaving lately, and she’s not speaking to her dad, my DH, over petty stuff - not giving her money to spend when she wants on what she wants, etc. She has a big match this weekend, and she doesn’t want us to attend.
My DH said all of this and a lot more to his colleague and asked her what to do. She told him to respect our daughter’s decisions and not to attend! I don’t agree at all. I told our daughter that she can’t go to a party if we can’t come to the match. My husband’s colleague disagreed and said that’s not ok. He has now taken the colleague’s view. He tells his colleague a lot of things, by the sounds of it. They are peers and working in a stressful environment, and he’s always leaning on her. I am pissed off with him for discussing our family issues with her and taking her side. I told him to stop talking to her, too, as I noticed he calls her a lot and they have very long conversations. He’s now annoyed and said she’s a good friend and that I am controlling. She also told him to start putting himself first, as he's unwell too, but he has to work to pay for our kids' school fees. She told him to think it through, as in why is he doing it all, while I am not pulling my weight, while he’s unwell. I am livid.

OP posts:
Jovilady22 · 10/12/2025 07:07

GaIadriel · 07/12/2025 10:02

He should marry the friend. 🤣🤣🤣

Well you never know that in a few years time the OP will be back moaning because DH has left her because she didn’t listen and want to change.

Th8754 · 12/12/2025 23:06

Sorry for the radio silence. It’s been a rough week with sick kids.

OP posts:
Th8754 · 12/12/2025 23:12

As I said before, I am retraining and should start earning income when that’s done. The DH is still treating his colleague as his bestie, but honestly, he’s in a better mood. I am still unhappy about what she told him. I did what we agreed - I raised the kids while he worked on his career. I can’t magically know be making ££££. I asked him not to speak about our lives to her, but he says she’s a good friend and means no harm.

OP posts:
Xkk · 12/12/2025 23:12

No worries OP, I hope kids are on the mend!

LAMPS1 · 13/12/2025 01:11

If he insists she’s a good friend and means no harm to your marriage , I’d be tempted to invite her round for a coffee or something and have a few pertinent questions or conversation starters ready for her, - in order to observe their interactions and levels of openness / discomfort.
You need to really take charge of this situation now OP.

Zerosleep · 13/12/2025 06:34

Jovilady22 · 10/12/2025 07:07

Well you never know that in a few years time the OP will be back moaning because DH has left her because she didn’t listen and want to change.

Nasty nasty nasty……..

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread