Am I a complete weirdo for contemplating moving to America?

[Frinkleg]

It’s always been an option as dh is a pilot. He’s spoken to an airline out there and would be able to secure a job with 3x the salary. We would actually be able to feel a little bit more than just comfortable.

I actually really do love the UK. I enjoy village life, British holidays, Brits are just funnier etc.

But the money is just too much of a head turner.

We could afford a gorgeous home in Connecticut with a pool.

We spend a lot of time in the states but only as holidaymakers. It would certainly be an adjustment.

of course I fear guns, American politics re female rights, I’m by no means pro Trump. The ICE raids are horrific. But we’d have some bloody money. And a nice house.

I can’t imagine the US ever feeling like home that’s the only thing.

I see that, but I do think that those seismic issues are bleeding into the fabric of life for many previously insulated people.

My DSis - as I posted upthread - is in a gated community in a privileged, Democratic-leaning area. All has been wonderful for 10 years or so, but she's started to talk about the possibility of gun ownership, and a possible move back to the UK. A friend in this liberal, professional bubble has experienced overtly racist comments on several occasions during the last year or so, for the first time in their adult lives.

There are incalculable differences between her life, and a young, single, pregnant Black woman in Texas, but even those in a bubble are aware that the sands are shifting.

Trump deploying the National Guard as a political move was chilling. The political discourse and direction of travel in the US are so profoundly important, I don't see how people can really think that it doesn't affect them, directly or indirectly.

The NHS does discriminate!!! Doctors and their families get better treatment. Politicians and the famous get far better treatment. Middle class articulate, not too ill to ask for help and to complain people get better treatment. Try being old ill or too sick with no relatives to advocate for you.

The truth is that is we don’t have an NHS any longer. We have a three tier system. The very wealthy seek treatment abroad. Those with some money go private for cataract, hip, knee surgery, gynae and other things, or if they want a GP appointment or to see a consultant without waiting months. The lower income have no choice but to use the NHS.

The sooner we move to a European health insurance system, the better.

I’d do it, life is for adventure. You can always move back if you like in the future, as can your children.

This one?
www.irishtimes.com/ireland/2025/10/28/irish-grandmother-detained-in-us-over-25-cheque-to-have-deportation-hearing-wednesday/

"Not a great deal" is rather vague. I wouldn't find it entirely reassuring. Non ACA insurance is still subject to inflation anyway.

Yes and no. The employers don’t have to offer some benefits to part-time workers, but FMLA has multiple eligibility requirements, one being 1,250 hours worked in the past twelve months (or roughly 24 hours per week) and also that the company has over 50 employees.

But I’ve worked part-time and had insurance coverage and vacation benefits. The point is some things aren’t straight forward. The company you work for vs. the state you work in vs. your job status/level means it’s very hard to make blanket statements about wages and benefits for all workers in the US.

People here are bringing up anythingt they can to put you off, but you could gather endless horror stories about the UK too. I say just go for it. Sounds like you'd end up in a very comfortable living situation.

I would go for it OP. What an adventure for you and your kids! If your health insurance is covered through your husbands work, then it seems pretty safe. If it all goes to crap you can always move back too.

@SLeighHart, yes there are plenty of negative things to say about the UK- and people frequently do! I’ve seen a few threads on MN where an OP is wondering whether to move to the UK from the US, or to move back to the UK from somewhere they previously emigrated to. There are always plenty of replies saying ‘Don’t do it!’ and outlining what posters see as the negatives about living here.

On these sorts of threads, I assume the OP wants to hear the good, the bad and the ugly about the place they’re thinking of moving to, otherwise why even ask the question?

I think that's actually an unfair comment. The US approach is much more about confidence building and it can be a really positive experience for a kid. The only thing about US high schools is that they do get very competitive when it comes to securing scholarships. It's a misconception that US high schoolers have it easier academically speaking. There is the option in most schools to go for Advanced Placement classes and those are high level.

Did he get locked up for six weeks before the charges were dropped?

Larry Bushart did.

Been in detention since September and they’re planning on deporting her. Lived in thenUSA since she was a kid so Ireland will be a bit of a shock for her…

Mmm, except my US nieces and nephews don’t speak any languages other than English ( some spotty Spanish at best), are
ignorant of most world history - they thought WW2 started in 1941, their geography is even worse ( if that’s possible), have been doing shooter drills all their lives, and a few of them don’t believe in evolution AT ALL. They think the earth is 6000 years old.

But - yes, I’ll give you confidence. They have confidence in spades. They think they live in the BEST country in the world and a great at everything. Despite all evidence to the contrary.
Don’t even get me started on their manners.

I’ve worked in insurance in the US and been buying health insurance via various methods for 18 years, so I’m used to there being inflation. But in talking to a very knowledgeable person about that specific question I did find the response reassuring.

My US children speak two languages and are very knowledgeable about world history and geography.

Well... there are bad schools of course. And I guess it also depends on the state- some of them have gone batshit. I just meant that like all generalisations, it's not necessarily the case and it can be a fantastic education. Sorry for your nieces and nephews though,

Also, to add, under the Affordable Care Act, children can stay on their parents healthcare until they’re 26.

Very true, thank you! My children are all older, even my grandkids are school age, so wasn’t the case then, when it would have mattered to them.

Its your life choose yourself its a good deal more money and let's face it, over here isnt brilliant anymore.

I've watched a number of videos of Americans who moved to the UK or other parts of Europe and they all seem to have one thing in common - they say they were sold a lie in America and it wasn’t until they moved out that they realised America is not what it told them it was since they were tiny (brainwashed really). I particularly like Evan Erdinger an American who doesn’t seem to have any intention of ever living in the US again. Also an African American family who love England and don’t want to go back. I know this is just a snapshot but all these Americans were genuinely astonished to find other countries where you could live freer and (generally) safer. I’m not a hater or anything, I really enjoyed my trips to America and never felt unsafe while holidaying.

I’ve always got the impression that American high schoolers have to treat their school years like a career in itself if they want to go to a decent uni (college). They have to be on top of extra curriculars, societies, and god knows what else in their spare time to be accepted into good colleges. It doesn’t seem enough to just get a good gpa (?).

To be fair, it varies massively. Not just from state-to-state, but from School Board to School Board. In Texas for example, the curriculum at a public school is going to be pretty parochial, the textbooks used to (pre-2011) be selected by the State Board of Education (which was dominated by creationist climate change deniers at the time). Funding is a big issue, schools are funded by local property taxes which means that wealthy neighbourhoods get the very best facilities and poorer areas do not. This is something the DoEd was supposed to level up, but now that department is being gutted.

We'll see what the future brings.

On the subject of inflation, OP you'd better ensure that your online calculators are up-to-date as the situation changes:
https://www.commondreams.org/news/inflation-under-donald-trump

Your head is understandably being turned by the dream of a big house and pool but I think if you were to really think on it, you wouldn't really want to leave home.
Occasionally, usually this time of year when November is much colder and more miserable than it is now, I daydream about moving out to Australia to live near my sister. We took could have a great life there. But I soon come to my senses when I think of leaving behind the rest of my family, our lifelong friends, everything the kids have known, their friends, their schools, and all of our memories. To go somewhere where you are a foreigner, where the kids might struggle to settle and fit in, where you might feel like an outsider, where you'll have to get used to different food, a different climate, a different culture, all while trying to settle into a new job and make new friends. I couldn't do it in any new country, not for me.

But all that .. and it's also America? No thank you. I was planning a trip to New York for my 40th but I've even decided against just a Holiday. I've no interest even visiting while Trump is in charge or any republican for that matter.

Alright if you're white, heterosexual, middle class... Sure. But is that the message you want to send? You'll welcome me but not my gay neighbour so I'll come? Nope nope nope.

It is of course up to you, but I'd suggest some deep soul searching