Neighbour heard everything!

[Soembarrassedd]

So I have been divorced a year and have been talking to a guy for a good while (we have met a few times prior to this) anyway, we ended up back to my house one night and my neighbour heard the whole thing. To the point where she knocked on the wall. I want to die of embarrassment, I saw her the other morning and she usually says hi, nothing, I think she now hates me.

Do you live in a flat? It would really piss me off if I could hear someone having loud sex when there are children overhearing it.

Absolutely no need for loud sex that can be heard in another property; it’s performative and inconsiderate.

Totally agree. It’s attention-seeking and selfish behaviour.

Maybe she's jealous?
Don't let it get to you, just smile inanely when you see her, with a little tinkly laugh too if you can fit it in as you pass her.

Yes! It might be that she was killing a spider, nothing to do with you! And looks are usually wrongly interpreted. Whatever, she has kids, they got here from her having sex so I think it is unlikely she is holding it against you! Move on

I was not moaning, it was the bed

I think you are projecting your anxiety, embarrassment, guilt onto your neighbour. I should think she quickly got over it! She is very unlikely to be judging you as a mother. Or she could be mortified that she knocked, embarrassed she heard and that is why she can’t look you in the face. Try not to dwell x

As someone who can hear my neighbour's every fart, she's probably blanking you because she's mortified with embarrassment. I know I stopped meeting my neighbour's gaze after her gentleman caller started calling, it was entirely TMI.

Sounds like your neighbour's problem, not yours!

I knew someone who lived on the ground floor. Guy upstairs from her had a word because the guy ABOVE HIM, second floor, had complained about sex noises. Now THAT is embarrassing.

It was the wrong response. You are supposed to make fake noises not quite in time, or applaud at the end.

I hear my neighbour going at it solo nearly every night, around the same time of night. I'm sure she hears us on a regular basis too. Neither of us say a word to each other thankfully 😅 it's a natural thing adults do so your neighbour needs to grow up

cheer during and applaud at the end

100% 😂

I am all for a healthy and lively sex life, but it's very strange to even want to be noisy in a room with a shared wall, when you know the neighbours will hear you.

It's quite grim actually.

Mine hears me most nights 😂 she never knocks though, I imagine its just as embarrassing for the neighbour when they see you

I would just move on. She probably wont start talking to you again for a while.
If a bed was repeatedly banging on my wall I would be angry.

I'll be noisy wherever I want in my own home. It's not like it's obscenely loud. I can hear her masturbating every night so why should I wear a gag during sex?

Unless you are in a shared dorm room, how noisy must you be 😂

Yes, it sounds far too performative to be anything but fake. Who would even want to have noisy sex against a shared wall? Do you live in a studio flat and you MUST do it against that wall?

Many things are natural but nevertheless should be private.

It’s a bit weird, not to say thoughtless ,that you’d even want to have noisy sex, when you already know walls are thin, and there’s a young family next door . I don’t blame your neighbour for blanking you now.

Oh no, not the performative moaning, OP?

Sorry how on earth do you know she’s on her own every night?? Do you have cameras watching all entrances into her property? Come on, you’ve no idea who is or isn’t there. That’s not nice.

Just say to her next time you see her - by the way I have been politer than you have but I can also hear you banging your husband through the wall so you can stop looking at me like a piece of shit on the bottom of your shoe! Clearly we all do it!”

I don't have sex against a shared wall. My bed is the opposite side to our shared wall. I'm just saying I know the neighbour can probably hear our sex based on the fact that I can hear her masturbating

I know she's on her own because she lives alone and I can actually hear the vibrator through the wall. I hear her plug it in, start it up, then the moaning. Its clearly one of the mains operated wands. I've lived next to hear for 6 years and this is a near nightly occurrence.

Years ago I lived in a downstairs apartment - old place with very solid walls. I think the lady who lived upstairs may have had a brass bed or something. Honestly, once they started the squeaking of that bed was unmistakeable and it was at all hours. If we had friends round we grew used at the first creaking to leap up and put on background music to drown it out. Consider replacing the bed.