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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

RSVP to my 4 year old’s party told me they’re bringing 2yr old sibling

307 replies

Watchespaintdry · 11/11/2025 07:47

We’re doing a 4th bday party at home for my daughter (money is tight hence at home), sent the invites out yesterday specifically addressed to the invited child and one of my friends has responded saying their daughter + 2yr old brother would love to come (she’s worded it to imply they don’t have childcare). So she’s telling me, not asking me, that the brother is coming too. I’ve been to parties before and always asked if if was ok to bring my 2.5yr old son too, due to lack of childcare, and these were soft play parties with no space issues, as it were. If they’d said no I couldn’t, I’d be totally cool and understand.

Thing is, I’m concerned about the space, and that this person will have 2 kids to watch. We’ve only got so much space around the dining table. She was the first to rsvp and now I’m worried other people are gonna bring siblings. I’ve got no problem with the brother, he’s cute and lovely and I love my friend and don’t want to upset her. I’ve invited 11 of my daughter’s friends (mixture of preschool and others) and confident they won’t all be able to come, given party statistics. Should I just suck it up and hope no one else brings siblings? This is the first party I’ve ever hosted.
My 2.5 yr old son will also be there (ofcourse).

OP posts:
Makingadecision · 16/11/2025 17:25

Reply and say glad your daughter can come but I’ll need to let you know later on about son due to restrictions on numbers.

SleepingStandingUp · 16/11/2025 17:41

MummiestMonster · 15/11/2025 22:40

Definitely nip it in the bud. We stopped having home party's once a friend dropped both her kids off (only 1 was invited, we'd barely met her brother!) then they were 2 hours late collecting them and weren't answering their phones! Apparently they didn't realize the time and went shopping. Worst 2 hours ever thinking they must have been in an accident

so you stopped your kids having birthday parties because of the actions of one selfish adult?

SleepingStandingUp · 16/11/2025 17:46

Lockdownsceptic · 12/11/2025 19:23

This sort of thread always slightly bewilders me. When my children were very little I invited some of my mum friends and their children to parties. Once the children went to school, invitees to parties were dropped off and picked up two hours later. I always put a finish time on the invitations. Never any excuse for gate crashing siblings.

if it's in a soft play centre there's no way you're providing adequate to 20+ 5 year olds by yourself

RubySquid · 16/11/2025 19:21

SleepingStandingUp · 16/11/2025 17:41

so you stopped your kids having birthday parties because of the actions of one selfish adult?

Did you not read? HOME parties. Nothing said about stopping birthday parties

Jack80 · 17/11/2025 06:20

I would be ok with siblings if parents are staying not dropping them off with their other child. You could sent a message and say parents need to stay if bringing a siblings along.

Endorewitch · 17/11/2025 22:44

Ig wouldnt be a problem for me. How much space does a 2.5 yr old take up?It would sound rrally petty if you cited lack of space.
This often happens with this age group. You have a child the same age. Just be generous and let him come.

Lockdownsceptic · 17/11/2025 23:58

SleepingStandingUp · 16/11/2025 17:46

if it's in a soft play centre there's no way you're providing adequate to 20+ 5 year olds by yourself

OP said party was at home to save money.

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