To be offended at my husband saying he prefers his mum’s cooking

[marinapl]

We’re at his parents’ house for the weekend. He says “I love coming here for the food” ie his mum’s cooking. I cook literally every day for this man and our kids. Some are admittedly relatively easy, like just rubbing some salmon with chimichurri sauce and sticking it in the oven or a simple curry, others more complicated like a bolognaise from scratch or trying to cook Korean cuisine etc.
I don’t get on well his mum so I’m not sure if that’s what has offended me or the fact that clearly my cooking is sub par but he opts to still eat it daily.

My husband prefers his mums cooking to mine- I couldn’t give a fuck 🤷‍♀️ I think most people prefer their childhood food don’t they?
I like my parents cooking better than his too- doesn’t mean we hate each others cooking.

I mean, if you’re that angry you could stop cooking as much blah blah, but honestly I just don’t think it’s something to get worked up over- your kids will likely feel the same about your food as they grow up.

Yet another person who seems to want to have an issue with their mother in law. Who cares that he loves her cooking? That’s his mum and he grew up with it. This wouldn’t bother me in the slightest. Me and my husband have this joke about my spag bol and how it’s rubbish and his mums is better, I personally don’t like hers because she doesn’t use enough salt for my taste but that’s a personal taste thing not a dig to her!

I guess this depends on the relationships generally. But there are dishes that my parents cook that are nostalgic to me.

I think it was a rude comment. I would make him do more cooking.

Just ask his mum for some lessons and recipes. Cooking for the family is a hard unrewarding job. But everyone has their nostalgic faves. Learn some of his! And maybe get a better MIL relationship at the same time

Dh is a much, much better cook than my mum ever was.

I am a shit cook, by choice.

The dc will need to learn to cook, or marry well.

I used to love going to my Grandparents for the food. My Nan’s cooking was wonderful and something I’d cherished since I was a child. But my husband’s cooking is also wonderful. He absolutely understood how much I loved the food my Nan cooked (and being with my Grandparents to eat it), he certainly wouldn’t have made it about whose cooking was the best.
I would try not to overthink it, saying he loves going to his Mum’s for food doesn’t mean he doesn’t love your cooking. He can love eating at his Mum’s AND love your cooking, both things can be true.

Its really hard to chop peppers and onions with a blunt knife? 🤷🏼‍♀️ 😆 🤣. Oooohh or maybe they stupid ring pulls off the tinned tomatoes keep popping off? That rips my knitting when that happens 🤬.

Mr.Sensitive!

I think you're getting very wound up about this, he might have just been complimenting/thanking his mum for providing his dinner. It's not like he's specifically said he doesn't like your cooking, or even that he actually prefers hers. Even if he does prefer it, so what!? Presumably your marriage is based on more than just your spag bol, have some more confidence and self assurance, you don't need him to love everything you do all the time. Or would you prefer he lied to you all the time and said everything was the best he's ever seen/had/eaten , I don't think that's a good basis for a relationship tbh.

You could be a trained chef and he could still prefer the meals his mum cooked. It’s not something to take personally.
I will always prefer my mums cooking to anyone else’s because they’re familiar and wonderful.

Don't overthink this, I'd feel sorry for him if he didn't, he had no choice to eat that food until you came along.

My MIL is an amazing cook in her country cuisine. I could never compare but she taught me so he says I'm second best.

After 10 years he finally admitted I make better salads and Italian food and of course English haha.

It's okay. It's quite innate if the mum is a good cook anyway

I prefer my MIL cooking to my own 🤣

she also doesn’t have kids running around, a full time job and a lazy husband so….

Ok so you’re blowing this way out of proportion !
He didn’t say he didn’t like your cooking, infact he didn’t say he loved his mothers more , but even if he did . So what ??
OP , I prefer my son’s gfs mothers cooking to mine , I’ve told her so , she’s sent me recipes & methods & I still can’t get mine to taste as good as hers 🤷🏻‍♀️.. My son prefers hers 😂, it doesn’t bother me in the slightest cause it isn’t anything to get upset about ..
It’s just food .. I realise we’re all different & different things matter to us , that’s not something worth getting worked up over though 🙂

Take it on the chin- but when DH annoys you send him around to Mum "so he can enjoy her cooking", when you are sick of cooking send him to his Mum.
He'll get the message.

I’m with you OP, I think it’s a wankerish thing to say in front of your wife who cooks for you every day. Lots of ways to show appreciation without the insinuation that it’s better.
’Thank you, I really enjoyed that.’
’This is beautiful Mum.’

This. Our daughter’s cooks a superior Christmas dinner. She still prefers mine.

Wher I come from, it’s perfectly normal to love ur mothers cooking proudly, if anything it would be weird if you didn’t. Ur dh grew up eating his mums cooked food, of course he’ll prefer it over yours. Your his wife not mum so stop trying to compete with his mum

Same! I'm an awful cook and even I can make a bolognase from scratch!

You’re being unreasonable. He said he liked going there for the food, not that it was better than yours. And even if he does think it’s better, he’s allowed to prefer things if he wants? My mums cooking is a million times better than mine and DH agrees. I couldn’t get worked up about this.

Why ? My husband's mother was an incredible cook , I just feed people. I'm very sure you have qualities she doesn't have. It really isn't a competition but it's ok to acknowledge each others strengths

He was telling his Mum how much he loves her cooking! Like, the food he ate probably every singe day until he left home and may or may not have been feeling nostalgic for that. He was not criticizing you.

I agree with PP, you’re letting your dislike of your MIL cloud your judgement here.

Maybe his mum cooks different food than you? It doesn’t mean he prefers it - he just enjoys eating the food his mum cooks.

If we go out to McDs I might say I love it, but I actually prefer what I cook at home. McDs just makes a nice change.

His mum’s cooking is probably nostalgic and just different than yours.

Maybe its what you cook. Is there anything his Mum cooks that you dont? Maybe you could try cooking something she does. Hes niot saying yours is bad. And as someone else said he could be saying that to please his Mum

Poor mil, she cooks for you all but you are looking for reasons to justify disliking her more.
It’s sad, and you will likely be the mil one day.