To be offended at my husband saying he prefers his mum’s cooking

[marinapl]

We’re at his parents’ house for the weekend. He says “I love coming here for the food” ie his mum’s cooking. I cook literally every day for this man and our kids. Some are admittedly relatively easy, like just rubbing some salmon with chimichurri sauce and sticking it in the oven or a simple curry, others more complicated like a bolognaise from scratch or trying to cook Korean cuisine etc.
I don’t get on well his mum so I’m not sure if that’s what has offended me or the fact that clearly my cooking is sub par but he opts to still eat it daily.

I would be telling him to do his own cooking

Yeah, fair. I meant spicier than I would make for children.

I would probably just make my own food if I were the husband. And I think OP is overreacting to the comment.

There are plenty of places in the world where kids thrive on spicy food.

Try telling that to my Egyptian friends

He was just being nice to his mum. Most of us remember our childhood favourites fondly.

Mm. I think you’re looking to find offence here really.

I love going to my mums for food too! And really hope my kids say the same about mine (even though I’m not great at it). It’s just about taking me back to ‘home’, it’s familiar and comforting.

My mum can't even cook yet I love going there for dinner. It's home. You've taken it the wrong way.

Why does everything have be a competition, challenge or offensive.
Let him enjoy DM's food.

Agree on this.

I'm a former chef and my partner swoons over his mum's apple crumble and Christmas dinner. It's really sweet, nothing to feel threatened over. But I love his mum so expect that's the difference.

Yeh, you’re definitely taking this too personally. It’s completely natural to have a preference for the food you grew up with, irrespective of whether the cooking is objectively good or not. It’s all wrapped up in the nostalgia and emotions many of us have connected to our childhoods. But if you want to be childish about it and take offence, just don’t cook for him anymore 🤷‍♀️

It doesn’t. Poor guy probably just said it to be nice to his mum, as most polite guests would. Thus is defo a you problem.

You’re being far too dramatic. He can like going to his family for food. It could be the nostalgia. You don’t like his mum, sounds like you’re trying to pick a fight. I loved going to my nans for certain food, but it doesn’t mean I didn’t like my mums cooking.

That's exactly what I thought.

You are being oversensitive. He didn't outright say he perfers his mum's cooking to yours and really so what if he does? I prefer my own mum's cooking to mine when it comes to traditional south asian food. Dh prefers some of his own mum's recipes to mine.

Like @londongirl12 I enjoyed going to my nan's house for food but that didn't mean my mum wasn't a good cook.

My son likes my cooking, and I am not really all that good at it. Its nostalgia more than due to the deliciousness of what I make. Come to think of it, I liked my mums cooking, and she was worse than me!

Dont be pathetic.

Its about family and home and memories of growing up etc rather than the actual food.

Like people have said, a huge overreaction on your part. I love my partner's cooking, and I love my mum's cooking.

I have the option to eat out wherever I want every evening if I fancied it, but I still love going to my mum's because of her cooking. Little things like I love the fact she has mushrooms in her spag bol and they're really chunky, the fact she shreds her chicken in curries, or that her eggy bread reminds me of childhood.

Not me, my mother was not a good cook at all!

But I'm with those who suggest he was simply giving his mum a compliment. But also with those who suggest he should do more cooking.

My dcs say that about home. I used to say it myself about my mum's cooking. DH was only talking about his mum's apple tart yesterday. I wish he could have it one more time.
I think you need worry if he says he prefers his mum's company, but not her cooking. That's so normal, and anyway, it's not a competition, is it?
One day your dcs will say they love coming home because they love your cooking.

Do you have sons? Once they're married are they never to compliment your cooking again for fear of offending their wives?

It really doesn’t.
It’s just different. He can enjoy both without one having to be better or worse than the other

Why do you not get on with his mother?

This is looking for problems. Maybe based on dislike of his mother or perhaps resentment for your workload. What your husband said can be seen as a polite thing to say in gratitude to a host.

Let him cook more often and don’t let his mother live rent free in your head. What he said is only relevant if you take it this way.