To be offended at my husband saying he prefers his mum’s cooking

[marinapl]

We’re at his parents’ house for the weekend. He says “I love coming here for the food” ie his mum’s cooking. I cook literally every day for this man and our kids. Some are admittedly relatively easy, like just rubbing some salmon with chimichurri sauce and sticking it in the oven or a simple curry, others more complicated like a bolognaise from scratch or trying to cook Korean cuisine etc.
I don’t get on well his mum so I’m not sure if that’s what has offended me or the fact that clearly my cooking is sub par but he opts to still eat it daily.

Beans on toast for him going forward then.

This is all you Op. His Mother’s cooking was his first experience of food, his childhood favourites, his comfort food. You are not in competition with her because you can’t be. You weren’t there. Maybe his mum is a better cook but he hasn’t said your food is shit has he. I loved my MIL cooking, it was next level. Does it mean my food was awful, God no, I raised 3 boys to men and guess what? They like coming home for….. the food. Why not just enjoy it?

Most people love their mum’s cooking. It’s not a competition. YABU. And a bit weird.

Can his mum teach him how to cook? Win win

He didn't actually said he preferred his mum's food though, that's just what you read into it.

I love going to my dad's for food. He will cook the same dishes as when I was a kid, it feels like "home", and even if I follow the same recipe I won't get the same results.

It was even more pronounced with my grandmother! I can still remember the taste of her leek, potato and carrot soup!

Dh and ds love my mums cooking better than mine. Can't say I blame them!

My mother in law was a much better cook than I’ll ever be. She loved it, I don’t particularly although I obviously do cook. Not remotely offended if DH prefers his mother’s cooking to mine. I do too! I also prefer his cooking to mine.

You're reading an awful lot into a really innocent comment.

I'm a fucking fantastic cook and I know it, I don't take any offence at all that my husband also loves his mum's cooking and enjoys going over there for tea. It's not even just about the quality of the food, it's wrapped up in nostalgia and childhood and love. Mum's cooking is more than just good food.

You're letting your dislike of his mother influence how you're reading his comment imo. If he'd said "I love coming here for the food, Marinapl's cooking would make Gordon Ramsay cry" I'd maybe understand your point but that's not what he said.

It's very common to think fondly of your mother's cooking and prefer it in some ways. It 'tastes like home' because it's what you grew up eating. It can bring back pleasant memories and that glow of youth. I would try not to take it personally, but if it comes up often it wouldn't hurt to talk about it so he'll be conscious that it's annoying you.

There’s a lot more to food than taste. Maybe he has fond memories of them eating together, that feeling of security and growing up when he had no responsibilities and enjoying their company during dinner.

I think you are reading too much into this. He loves his mum’s cooking. That’s all.

I can cook. My DH can cook. My mum isn’t the best cook but by goodness, I love it when I do go round and she does her sausage and mash. It’s not just the food but the childhood memories all wrapped up.

I do a good roast dinner. But my MIL would make an amazing roast. I would fully expect my DH to say that his mum’s roasts were the absolute best. Because they were. She had 50 odd years experience making them. And now we don’t get to have them.

Never cook for him again

That's an even bigger overreaction than the OP's!

That's an even bigger overreaction than the OP's!

This is quite funny really. I do understand your umbrage OP but honestly it means nothing.

Both my XH new partners approached me complaining that he told them my cooking was far superior to theirs. Now that’s really stupid/nasty.

I coimd eat from top chefs in the would and my mum's dishes would still be "better" 😁
It's nothing personal. Mum's cooking is mum's cooking

Well - IS his mums cooking nice? You haven't said.

He hasn't said he doesn't like yours.

Is he appreciative of you on a day to day basis?

Get why you're upset. Maybe give him a nudge about it....
My DH has had to take on a lot more cooking due to my ill health. It's generally ok but would never criticise anyway as he's taken on this load, as well as looking after our children and working. However, both my brother (who's a good cook) and I says no one beats my mum's roast dinners. We've always said it and it's never been personal......

He can also cook for the kids instead of you? And he didn’t say or imply he didn’t like your food, he was complimenting his mum, the conversation and statement were not about you. A man can talk to his mum without involving his wife

Belter of an overreaction

Agree with this.

Mums cooking is almost always best. They/we put so much effort into cooking things a particular way for their/our kids that nothing can ever really compare. It might not be the tastiest food, but it's mums food. That'll always trump anything else.

Always amazed at the idea of a grown man never cooking for himself.

I cook for our kids and as he’s there I naturally make an extra portion for him.
Blimey, is he really that much of an afterthought?

This is what i thought upon reading this threads title. Maybe he could ask his mum for some recipes and you could sit back, pour the drinks, and enjoy. I'll bet she does a cracking Christmas dinner, OP. What a treat for you.😉

My MIL was an appalling cook, in 25 years I don’t think I ate a meal I didn’t need to make myself eat.
DH would always go on about wonderful dishes his mum made when we went to stay. I think a lot of it is familiarity and sentimentality.