Husband and Lindor

[Clementina49er]

A couple of weeks ago we were in Wilko together and he added a bx of Lindor in some weird flavour (possibly Baileys) to my shopping basket for which I paid without comment. They went on a shelf in the kitchen and I had maybe two out of the box before discovering the empty box a mere two days later. I made no comment but I must admit I thought "that's a lot of chocolate to eat between meals in such a short time."
Ten days later I saw a box of Lindor dark chocolate mint flavour in Sainsburys so I bought them. I have a bit of a thing for dark chocolate and mint.... but a box of Bendicks lasts me at least a fortnight.
The Lindor went in the cupboard but I'd have one from to time to time in the evening with a cup of coffee after my meal.... they weren't "hidden " as such because DH is perfectly capable of opening the cupboard door.... but I know what he's like with chocolate, sweets and biscuits and a packet left anywhere visible in the kitchen will be empty before you can say "I was looking forward to eating one of those"... After lunch I noticed him go and help himself to one of the Lindor.... I made no comment, and decided I'd have one too..... I did notice there weren't many left in the box butagain, I didn't comment.... he's a grown man.
However, when I saw with his hand in the box less than an hour later something snapped and I said "only one a day": he was very offended, but he knows where the supermarket is and has enough money to buy his own damn chocolate if he wants to make a pig of himself.... He is noticeably overweight and has a sweet tooth as well as a love of alcohol and fatty foods. I cook from scratch and we eat healthy, nutritious, filling meals so I really hate to see the crap he eats in between times, not because he's hungry, but because it's there.He buys bags of Doritos and creamy dips, adds mayonnaise to meals which have their own sauce and puts 3tsp of sugar in his coffee. I make no comment about any of this, but AIBU to set a rule that expensive chocolate which I have bought is limited to one a day? There is actually other chocolate in plain view on the table, so he could have helped himself to that, but he decided he wanted a second Lindor. I rather suspect that if I hadn't seen him with his hand in the box I would have gone to it this evening for a chocolate and found it empty.

Those Lindor boxes are quite small though. I have about 3 or 4 in a day which I thought was quite restrained. I buy them when the big boxes are on offer on Amazon, though that's not very often now. I fill my ginger jar with them for a tasty treat, I know when DH is at the jar as I hear the lid,

As a fully grown adult I would not want nor expect anybody to be policing what I eat. However these were your chocolates and he had no right to snaffle them all.

And that's his business.

She's his wife, not his Mother.

It's clear you don't really approve of his eating which, while I understand, you need to let go. Having said that, its also clear you largely DO let it go.

But this is the issue and I totally get it. I don't have a hugely sweet tooth. I also like a bit of dark lindt mint chocolate. If I buy a bar, it would last me about two weeks because I DO like 2-3 squares at a time... but usually only every few days. But DH and DS will devour it. And then I get the same thing as you, "you're hiding the chocolate" so then I was completely upfront. I buy whatever treat it is and I say that I will be hiding it because I am tired of not being able to have the treat when I want it, because it's already been eatne.

DH did once say to me, "well, we could just buy more" then. To which I have responded with a) welll - who will do the buying? I do the shoppingin this house, once a week. Are you going to make a point of going out to buy more, which would first require you realising it was necessary (said more nicely than that) and b) if we buy more, more just gets eaten. Which is not healthy or good for anyone.

Nowdays I just sometimes tuck my favourite away somewhere and if it's found and he briefly forgets the issue, I remind him....

I buy bounty and bounty ice cream as DH hates coconut. Problem solved.

Its the competitive MN under eating - there is always somebody less piggy than you.

My God you sound boring OP, I hope he files for divorce soon, I would. Then you can eat all the chocolate you want and bw miserable alone.

Half a Lindor.

Fuck me that's a miserable way to live.

Well after reading that I'm craving Lindor 😂
I admire your discipline OP wish I could do just 1 a day
On a serious note I get why you are annoyed, you can't tell another adult what to eat but you can tell him he either shares equally or buys his own

You need one of those alarmed biscuit barrels to keep them in. Or just stash them in the cleaning cupboard behind the vacuum. They'll be safe there.

Just hide it better op - and fwiw I wouldn't let my DH boss me around that much.

God I cant bear all this treating each other like toddlers. Having own treat boxes, hiding chocolate etc. You are grown ups for God sake. Buy the chocolate, eat the chocolate , buy some more. Tell your partner if you a pissed off that theres none left and either do without or buy some more. I cannot imagine having discussions about who owns a bar of chocolate!

flipping heck.

I couldn't live with a glutton.

"buy his own damn chocolate if he wants to make a pig of himself."

Why is language like this allowed on this site? I know MN is supposedly full of waifishly delicate women only, but surely referring to people as pigs because they eat more than you, is a horrid thing to do?

It happens in EVERY eating thread here.

He is your spouse. Not your child. Let the man be.

Only one per day of HER chocolates. He can eat what he wants of his own chocolates, but he doesn't. He eats hers!

You still have a Wilco near you? Lucky you.

I can’t imagine my spouse and I having separate grocery budgets. Fair enough to say you want to split the box and no one takes more than half so you can eat at your leisure, but policing his intake is ridiculous.

Clearly the half a Lindor comment was sarcasm, why's everyone so full on...

I would eat his chocolate when he's not aware. Then when he goes to get some, it'll all gone. Once that's happened once, hopefully he'll be more mature.

Not ok to eat all his then overeat yours as well, he can go out to get himself more. That's just basic manners.

Deary me, you sound ridiculous. A box would only last a few days in this house.

Don’t buy Linder and leave it somewhere it might be inhaled.

Don’t share chocolates or treats OP. Each have your own or make it a rule that you get half of the treat each and once it’s gone it’s gone and no stealing from the other person’s half. Seems to work for my DH and me.

One time we had some delicious expensive biscuits that I only buy when they’re on a half price sale. Money was pretty tight at the time. Six to a packet, so three each. He’d eaten three, I’d eaten two. Went for my last one. Gone. No packet in the cupboard. He’d eaten it. He’d decided that I mustn’t have wanted it or that he’d only had two or something. Anyway, I got upset and since then he’s stuck to only eating his allocated half of something like that.

I’m really happy 😃

You are being unreasonable to say ‘only one a day’, he’s a grown man and that’s very controlling. I don’t think this is about your chocolate but the fact he is overweight and eating unhealthy foods, which you clearly don’t like. So you are being unreasonable to make a rule about one specific thing instead of talking to him more about your actual issue and concern which is his weight and unhealthy eating.

"To those sugesting I hide my treats that I want to eke out, I did that for a while but then he finds them and complains "you've been hiding the chocolate again"."
To which I would respond 'I wouldn't get any of MY chocolates if I didn't hide them you greedy fucker. Go and buy your own.' Honestly, he hasn't a leg to stand on if he complains about you wanting to have your chocolate.