Husband and Lindor

[Clementina49er]

A couple of weeks ago we were in Wilko together and he added a bx of Lindor in some weird flavour (possibly Baileys) to my shopping basket for which I paid without comment. They went on a shelf in the kitchen and I had maybe two out of the box before discovering the empty box a mere two days later. I made no comment but I must admit I thought "that's a lot of chocolate to eat between meals in such a short time."
Ten days later I saw a box of Lindor dark chocolate mint flavour in Sainsburys so I bought them. I have a bit of a thing for dark chocolate and mint.... but a box of Bendicks lasts me at least a fortnight.
The Lindor went in the cupboard but I'd have one from to time to time in the evening with a cup of coffee after my meal.... they weren't "hidden " as such because DH is perfectly capable of opening the cupboard door.... but I know what he's like with chocolate, sweets and biscuits and a packet left anywhere visible in the kitchen will be empty before you can say "I was looking forward to eating one of those"... After lunch I noticed him go and help himself to one of the Lindor.... I made no comment, and decided I'd have one too..... I did notice there weren't many left in the box butagain, I didn't comment.... he's a grown man.
However, when I saw with his hand in the box less than an hour later something snapped and I said "only one a day": he was very offended, but he knows where the supermarket is and has enough money to buy his own damn chocolate if he wants to make a pig of himself.... He is noticeably overweight and has a sweet tooth as well as a love of alcohol and fatty foods. I cook from scratch and we eat healthy, nutritious, filling meals so I really hate to see the crap he eats in between times, not because he's hungry, but because it's there.He buys bags of Doritos and creamy dips, adds mayonnaise to meals which have their own sauce and puts 3tsp of sugar in his coffee. I make no comment about any of this, but AIBU to set a rule that expensive chocolate which I have bought is limited to one a day? There is actually other chocolate in plain view on the table, so he could have helped himself to that, but he decided he wanted a second Lindor. I rather suspect that if I hadn't seen him with his hand in the box I would have gone to it this evening for a chocolate and found it empty.

Thank you, that's exactly what I meant..... I don't try and stop him eating anything else in the house, and never comment on the crap he buys at the supermarket : as everyone has said, he's a grown man but very short on self control.
To those wondering about the "who buys it" issue - whoever goes to the supermarket pays, if we go together I pay and I pay for everything in the basket. It is not a question of money, as we both have sufficient. And he has been known to go to the supermarket to buy stuff that he fancies four or five times a week!

To those sugesting I hide my treats that I want to eke out, I did that for a while but then he finds them and complains "you've been hiding the chocolate again".

Hide your stash or tell him to buy and only eat his own.
You lost me at “I made no comment” and then seem shocked he doesn’t think about chocolate the same way as you. Is he a mind reader? If he’s not as health conscious about food as you he won’t see anything wrong with eating chocolate in the cupboard that’s not hidden, and in his mind isn’t even getting eaten if it take you that long to eat the damn thing, so it’s just “fair game” to him.
I know what my DH is like with chocolate so I tell him “touch those chocolates and I’ll break your legs” if temptation gets the better of him now he will replace them for me before I either notice or have time to say anything (and usually thinks he’s got away with it…) but at the end of the day I now get to eat MY treats when I want.

We've got one inside our The Range store where I live.

But it's still rubbish.

Lindor are literally unavoidably bingeable. You must hide them. I think they're better in the fridge. Maybe hide them in the container for something he hates? The pistachio ones are absolutely heavenly!

Just an add on , didn't Wilkos fold a couple of years ago ?

It sounds like you were going to have more than 'one-a-day" though?

You know ultra-processed foods like chocolate are highly addictive to many people OP? If your husband is an addict, it is hard to not consume them. So, either don't buy them, buy them with the expectation an addict will strughle with control, or buy and lock away. Don't judge him, just be relieved you don't have the food-addict genes.

Hide it, buy extra or ask him not to eat your box of chocolates.

It was mean to snap and shame him for liking a couple of chocolates. Your comments about his weight and appetite sound very mean spirited.

@Clementina49er I'm with you on this one!

A box of chocolates bought together is to share. I must admit I am a big chocolate fan of Lindt so would eat a box very quickly!! That's why I don't buy them very often!

But if you buy your own box of chocolates, then that is YOURS, and if your DH wanted one, then he should have asked.

My DH often buys some nice snacks and I wouldn't dream of helping myself without asking and wouldn't dare eat more than a couple as that's just rude.

It's not surprising you snapped as his behaviour was greedy and rude.

You need to speak to him about this, and say that you bought them for yourself as he ate nearly the entire box of the ones you got in the supermarket, and you snapped because he had not only helped himself without asking, but eaten the majority of them.

Interesting, Lindor are most definitely avoidably bingeable to me and what's more should preferably be avoided at all costs. Now Malteasers on the other hand...

Ask what treats he wants from the supermarket and put them in the cupboard. Hide your own treats and each time he finds them move your hiding place. That's what I do anyway.

I do share when I open stuff e.g. in the evening for us all to enjoy but if they (the family) know where it is there will be nothing there.

Do you and your family buy there own seperate food or do you all share like an actual family

'Only one a day' would bring out the worst in me. Some people just hate authority. I'd be sitting there smeared in chocolate after that... probably in a semi-comatose state.

It's not controlling. It's just trying to get the greedy pig to not scoff all ops treats. Frustration is allowed when you get pissed off. If ops dh is bothered all he has to do is leave her chocolate alone. You shouldn't need to hide stuff because he has no self control.

Stop treating your husband like a recalcitrant toddler, it's not a good look. If he wants to eat chocolate all day, then that's his decision. He's an adult and capable of managing his food intake without your interference.

Feeling pretty sick has been known.... once (several years ago) I discovered an empty packet (400g of pure chocolate) that he had eaten over the course of an afternoon.
When he complained he was feeling queasy I just laughed at him.

Incidentally, to various PP, I didn't "snap" at him, it's just the self control that stops me commenting on the crap he eats that snapped, but I made the comment in a jokey way.

I occasionally eat half a Lindor and wrap the other half up for later. Anyone else?

We buy a load of different Lindt chocolates at Christmas and put them in a big glass bowl instead of having the crappy Quality Streets - they look much more festive and taste even better! My favourite are the strawberry ones! They last for ages as well because it's almost impossible to eat more than 3 in one sitting. That's not me being all competitive small portiony, it's just that they're really rich compared to some chocolates!
I love Lindt!

Tracking what he eats and saying "one a day" are awful and I'd be furious in his position. The issue is that he's eating it all so there is none left for you, so say that. The way you've phrased it makes it sound like you are his mum not his wife.

Honestly, if someone ate my chocolates I'd be telling them to fuck off. I remember dividing a bag of minstrels with my ex husband. He'd gone to bed but I still divided them as equally as I could and didn't scoff his while his back was turned.

he finds them and complains "you've been hiding the chocolate again".

Yes, I have, because if I don't you'll hoover it up.

I'm a hooverer, I can't have chocolate it in the house for this reason and I live with a hider. I'm not offended that he hides it, it's a practical move!

However you don't sound as though you like him very much, all things considered.

We have separate chocolates and crisps. Everything else is shared, but we do crisps and chocolate so differently.

DH will have chocolate last ages, but he'll have one/two every single day. Whereas I'll only have chocolate every few months, but I'll have it for a couple of days and then it's done.

Crisps I'm a binge eater of. If I've got one packet I'm happy. If there's six packets that I could eat then I'll eat six. So now we have our own share. Which means I eat mine straight away but don't touch anyone else's.

The kids have treat boxes as well and have a much healthier attitude toward food than I did at their age. They don't ever say "oh can I have one too" and only have their treats when they actually fancy them.

No

I'll have one maybe sometimes

If someone snapped 'only one a day' at me, I would the entire lot right then and there. If someone ate my box of chocolates that I had paid for, I would tell them to replace it. Both are rude and not the actions of equal loving partners.

Come on. Everyone knows that in a world where a mere sniff of a lettuce leaf is enough to leave you stuffed until Christmas, a single Lindor lasts at least a week.

Any more is sheer gluttony. Oink oink.