Husband and Lindor

[Clementina49er]

A couple of weeks ago we were in Wilko together and he added a bx of Lindor in some weird flavour (possibly Baileys) to my shopping basket for which I paid without comment. They went on a shelf in the kitchen and I had maybe two out of the box before discovering the empty box a mere two days later. I made no comment but I must admit I thought "that's a lot of chocolate to eat between meals in such a short time."
Ten days later I saw a box of Lindor dark chocolate mint flavour in Sainsburys so I bought them. I have a bit of a thing for dark chocolate and mint.... but a box of Bendicks lasts me at least a fortnight.
The Lindor went in the cupboard but I'd have one from to time to time in the evening with a cup of coffee after my meal.... they weren't "hidden " as such because DH is perfectly capable of opening the cupboard door.... but I know what he's like with chocolate, sweets and biscuits and a packet left anywhere visible in the kitchen will be empty before you can say "I was looking forward to eating one of those"... After lunch I noticed him go and help himself to one of the Lindor.... I made no comment, and decided I'd have one too..... I did notice there weren't many left in the box butagain, I didn't comment.... he's a grown man.
However, when I saw with his hand in the box less than an hour later something snapped and I said "only one a day": he was very offended, but he knows where the supermarket is and has enough money to buy his own damn chocolate if he wants to make a pig of himself.... He is noticeably overweight and has a sweet tooth as well as a love of alcohol and fatty foods. I cook from scratch and we eat healthy, nutritious, filling meals so I really hate to see the crap he eats in between times, not because he's hungry, but because it's there.He buys bags of Doritos and creamy dips, adds mayonnaise to meals which have their own sauce and puts 3tsp of sugar in his coffee. I make no comment about any of this, but AIBU to set a rule that expensive chocolate which I have bought is limited to one a day? There is actually other chocolate in plain view on the table, so he could have helped himself to that, but he decided he wanted a second Lindor. I rather suspect that if I hadn't seen him with his hand in the box I would have gone to it this evening for a chocolate and found it empty.

I kind of get this, OP. I don’t often eat chocolate (more of a crisps person) but sometimes buy something “fancy” which might sit in the cupboard for ages until I want it. Inevitably it’s then gone. My DP’s stance is “it had been sat in there for ages”. I now specifically say if I have bought something treat-y for myself and he knows not to eat it, or replace it if he does. I think telling someone they can only have one piece of chocolate a day is a bit strange though.

I was in Oliver Bonas yesterday and picked up a large bar of espresso martini chocolate that was by the till. I don’t think DP will like that so it’s probably safe enough.

As it happens, I too subscribe to the "one a day" rule for such things but my goodness if I were your husband I'd eat the whole lot in front of your face for having the cheek to tell me what I can and can't do. Sheesh, who do you think you are?

And please don't tell me you buy your chocolate out of your money and he buys his out of his, and this is really about him eating your chocolate.

MN is such an eye opener, sometimes.

Wilko, didn’t they all shut down?

.

You’re coming across as a bit pompous, to be honest.

I assumed OP meant only one a day of HER chocolates that she bought for HERSELF to have as a series of small treats, not be hoovered up in a huge stuff-your-face binge.

As she says,
"he knows where the supermarket is and has enough money to buy his own damn chocolate if he wants to make a pig of himself"

She's not treating him like a toddler, he's behaving like one.

Agree this is sensible - I know your pain I like to string things out and DH demolishes packets in one sitting and it is INFURIATING when I go to get a nice nibble and they’ve gone. So give him his to blast through but yours are yours.

You sound very controlling and tedious.

YABU for not giving a review of the dark chocolate mint Lindors.
Also, i learnt very early on, if you don't want to share hide your stash well.

It doesn't sound like it's his health that bothers you (or at least that's my impression). If it's the cost, then you will have to start discussing that more openly. If it's the fact that he is eating all chocolate and there is nothing left for you, then you will need to start buying your own chocolate each and eat it as you like it.

Either way, you need to be very clear on what your real issue is before you set about addressing it.

I thought this, but I just googled and there are a few stores. I still miss ours. 😭

I didn’t know how to vote as you are both being unreasonable. My husband and I could finish off a box of chocolates together in an evening but we only have them if we are given them. Your husband clearly has a food problem, so that is another reason not to buy them. I also don’t understand not sharing money in a marriage .

Chocolate makes me really sick but I'll just deal with the consequences if it's Lindor 🤣

Who do you think you are talking to another adult like that if my partner said only one a day to me like I was a child he would be very quickly regretting his words.

I don't think it's the Lindor that's the issue...

I was going to post this.

You object, OP, to more than one sweet a day? How petty! I couldn’t live like that

Eating all the chocolate and then leaving the empty box lying about is obnoxious. But so is being silently angry about something for days and then snapping about it. Just have a conversation with him, and agree on a chocolate buying and eating system that suits you both.

What is your actual issue OP?
Him eating chocolate in general or him eating YOUR chocolate? If it’s the former then YAB very U. If it’s the latter then just tell him not to nick it.

If anyone said “just one a day” to me in seriousness I don’t think I would have any kind of a relationship with them- I don’t even speak to my children in such a patronising way.

Because she is paying for it.

He can buy his own and stuff his face.

The way the OP says she spoke to her husband was exactly how somebody speaking to a toddler would speak. I get the sentiment that she wanted them saved, that's not the issue, the issue is that she treated her husband like a child. That's not OK.

It's unreasonable of you to have said only one a day, unless you mean one box of Lindor a day (each). Otherwise, nobody I have ever known just eats one solitary chocolate a day.

He's not your child and you aren't in control. Just ask him to go and buy a second box.

It's actually an utter non-event.

He can buy his own and stuff his face.

Leave hers alone.

I’ve tried these and they’re lovely 🥰, I’m also a bit obsessed with the shortbread ones , think they’re milk chocolate though .
The only ones I’ve tried and don’t really like are the white chocolate ones

Am I the only one who saw the thread title and assumed that 'Lindor' was the other woman?

Which is bizarre in itself, as I have a box of mint Lindor (for those wondering - they are fabulous) in the cupboard.

Tbf the box is already half empty when you open it !

I wouldn't police my husband on how many to have a day and surely if he's eating loads he's going to be feeling pretty sick quite soon !