Cleaner invited friends over AIBU

[Nestingbirds]

We have an arrangement with our cleaner that she takes care of our animals when we are away for a few days. She usually stays in the annexe but this time stayed in our house due to refurbishment.

We had an agreement when this started that we would prefer she didn’t have visitors apart from her long term boyfriend. He is away atm. She was totally on board, and said she would feel the same if it was her house.

We pay her really really well, and leave her lots of treats including fresh flowers. She told me she likes the time she has to herself, and all is well.

Only our neighbour texted me to say there are people coming and going from our house and sent me her ring doorbell footage. Not only is she having friends over, she isn’t actually spending time with the animals or cleaning (we pay her separately for both) as the rest of the time she has been out. We never leave our dog all day. Whilst we obviously don’t mind her going out, and want her to be happy, I just feel taken for a ride as she is clearly not there doing either.

I have messaged her to see how she is, hoping she would be honest about her friend coming over and staying for hours in our house, but she has continued to lie to me.

I feel like I can’t trust her now. Wwyd?

I think she was being a good friend to me, letting me know.

aren’t you a bit alarmed your neighbour has her camera directed at your front door op??! 😆

Did you ask your neighbour to direct her camera to your front door? 🤔

Agree that your neighbour does seem to have a lot of time on their hands.

Why don't you get a Ring door bell for your house then you could see exactly what's going on?

No, it covers both gardens and front doors areas. It doesn’t bother me. She is a really good neighbour and friend. I think maybe my dog has been crying so she has decided to mention it.

It probably picks it up,our neighbor next door but one has one and it picks us up walking past their drive. I know because she told me how smart my ds looks on the the way to work😂

She’s broken your trust and it’s the number one requirement for her job, so she needs to go.

It’s particularly awful that she has not done what was expected with your dog but having people coming and going is also an intrusion on your privacy.

Agree with PP to change the locks and alarms. Worth getting a Ring doorbell of your own, too.

Your neighbour’s camera has a full visual of your front door and both gardens?

Exactly what dh said. He is ordering as we speak. We feel let down, and really trusted her.

Why was your friend looking so extensively at the footage?

Hmm. Saying you would ‘prefer’ no visitors isn’t a hard and fast agreement. As someone else said you seem to have some blurred lines.

It could easily be a friend/family member having a crisis. They call her to meet them. She says she can’t as she’s looking after your dog, so they come round for a bit.

It feels like you’ve decided you don’t want her working for you anymore though

And your neighbour sounds a bit of a stirrer. Maybe they could look after your dog in future as they’re so ‘helpful’

Yes it detects any movement in a radius.

Op be honest

you asked your neighbour to spy on the cleaner

She has betrayed your trust…….how can you possibly keep her employed after this? Change the locks, collect up her stuff - even any cleaning materials she has supplied, pay her up to date and tell her she’s done! You don’t know who was coming into your home or even what they were doing whilst there.

My partner used to have a cat sitter who was great, would come over and feed the cat, do litter tray and then just sit with the cat and read the paper. Arrangement was great for a couple of years, then she met a boyfriend and he ended up doing some of the cat sitting too and spent no time there and clearly didn't change up the food or cat litter so he had to end the arrangement. Really frustrating when someone has been decent and then changes but it's not fair on the animal. Wait till you get back and then end it with her, including the cleaning. Unfortunately once a working relationship like this that is based on trust has broken, you can't really get it back.

How come? Surely there are kennels near you?

I don't include my sc when talking about my kids, never have done.

If she had a friend in crisis she could have just said?

Secondly, we had a solid agreement about this as my dh was burgled by a cleaner years ago, and she was more than happy with our arrangement.

I am really upset with her. She could have easily asked me. Or met her friend in any coffee shop nearby!

It's probably linked to her phone to ping when someone arrives/leaves.

Get the keys back and sack her. Dont take any notice of people asking why the neighbour can see your front door. Get your own Ring door bell put up asap.
You will never trust her again so get rid and take your dog with you next time.

I don't think you can count that as a lie or deliberate omission made in bad faith.

My neighbour was worried about my dog I suspect.

Yes that’s how she noticed. It has an alarm. I am grateful she has told me. My poor dog.

Ok so established you’ll get rid

So…. Get rid and find a house sitter through an agency

and a new cleaner through an agency

and enjoy the last few hours of your holiday