Fed up with DP going on about his mates new partner

[Cheysdiary]

As above - we met her for the first time at the weekend. When she went to the loo, my DP dramatically said to his friend HOW ON EARTH HAVE YOU MANAGED THAT and kept saying he is punching.

On the way home, he kept shaking his head and saying he doesn’t know how he has done it, and multiple references since this week including about her job being really good and how they’ll afford load of holidays etc. We are a bit stretched financially currently with young DC etc.

Last night I asked him if he was going to stop going on about her at any point and he got a bit defensive. Saying he’s happy for his mate, that he’s complimented them as a match and ‘it’s not like I’ve turned around and said I want to bury my tounge in her arse’.

AIBU to find repeated comments excessive?

Oh come on.

The fact he’s even said that shows what he’s thinking.
Neanderthal knuckle-dragger comes to mind and I wouldn’t want him anywhere near me as he’s clearly drooling over her.

Haha. I love this comment.

What an utterly disgusting thing to say. I'd instantly leave my partner if he said any of what you've mentioned but the tongue remark actually flipped my stomach.

Why do you want to stay in a relationship with such a disgusting man?

He sounds crass, sexist, and a bit thick. Is that really what you want in a partner?

Having read and understood your post op, he really did actually say he has been sitting there thinking about burying his tongue in her ass. There’s no other way he’d say that.

This.
How do you put up with this awful behaviour, OP? Ugh. Reminds me of my ex, constantly ogling other women and making comments about their looks and bodies.

My ex said something similar, I posted it earlier in the thread.

He was the most polite, well mannered, quiet, I'm with the females, nicest man you could have wished for... except when he had a drink his raging mysogynistic side came out and it was awful.
It doesn't even cross decent mens mind to say to their other half " I'm not burying my tongue in her ass"
It's not even on their radar.
You have a mysogynist OP and I'm absolutely sure if you look into your relationship this won't be your first red flag, I know it wasn't mine.

Disgusting language. A wise woman once said when people show you who they really are, believe them the first time.

Your DP is clearly jealous of his friend- his defensiveness is not a good sign either, he obviously was thinking about it.

Ha ha ha, no he didn't say it but that is exactly what he'd like to do.

Anyway no YANBU, personally I'd tell him to stfu about her, he could get as defensive as he liked, twat.

The repeated comments are unnecessary and the one re tongue and arse- I can’t believe a man is speaking to his wife about another woman like that. Seriously gross and disrespectful to you both.

How will you deal with this cheysdiary?

I would be really hurt by this, it feels massive disrespectful towards you, to be honest. Like passive aggressively.

A while ago my bf and I were watching a series where this guy is married into money and the FIL essentially controls their lives and I was saying how grim etc and he said something like “yeah, but you’d be set for life with no money worries” and I’m still salty about that, like he’d leave me if a fat check came along 😒

We all agree with you, why are you defending his comment? He’s gross and I dread to think what his blunt comments are like about you.

He's literally obsessed with her looks.

The rude language reveals his true nature, a creep, perv, filthy man

Do men literally all think and imagine all day long are assessed holes or vaginas

They can't be all like that

Why did you have children with someone so vile OP?

God, yes. I hadn't even picked up on that as I was so repulsed by the tongue comment.

Some men really are grim.

Wow…you really making the OP feel better. Sometimes I think people on here just love to kick you when you’re down. Yes he’s a prick but I doubt he thinks he’s settled.

• According to google, men think a bout sex 19 times a day on average. Debunking the previous popular (unsubstantiated) myth that had them thinking about it every 7 seconds, which would amount to over 8,000 times a day. Junk science in my opinion.

He’s making a point to you. He’s not enjoying the burden of financial responsibility and thinks you could be more attractive. Instead of speaking to you reasonably about this, he’s being immature and hurtful on purpose. Your move.

No - sorry - that’s not true and pretty offensive actually to the highly skilled people who work in the trades.
My husband is in the ‘trades’ - neither he nor anyone else he works with would ever use disgusting phrases like that this it’s utterly grim.

You can't swing a cat these days without hitting a rimmilingus reference. I'm waiting for it to pop up on Emmerdale.