To have done this to his clothes?

[Dockerty]

Bloke im seeing - first time he stayed at my house he had a shower and then left all his clothes (work uniform etc) folded (in a fashion) and piled up on the toilet. I went in to use the toilet, picked up his clothes and moved them into the bedroom.

Second time he stayed, he did the same thing so I went in to use the toilet, picked up his clothes and shouted of him to come and move them which he did.

3rd time - same thing - this time I didn’t pick them up, I just shouted of him to come and move them and asked him to stop doing this as I don’t want to be moving his clothes everytime I use the bathroom. He made a sarky “ooo ok boss” comment but moved them. I was pissed off and told him it’s a bit ridiculous that a grown man would leave his clothes like that for someone else to sort out! He said I was making a mountain out of a molehill.

So last night he stayed over again - same thing happened so this time I simply swiped the lot onto the floor, used the toilet and then got a shower myself. Accidentally on purpose stood on his clothes as I got out of the shower so they were wet.

An hour or so later he went to use the toilet and came back asking how his clothes got wet. I said they were on the floor. He said no they weren’t, they were on the toilet so I said yeah but then I needed to use the toilet so they ended up on the floor”.

He went in a full on mood about it saying it was petty and disrespectful and maybe he should treat my clothes the same way. I said he could - but he’d have to take them out of the drawer or wardrobe to do it which would be a bit weird.

so, who is BU, me or him?

you don't sound as if you like him very much.

I'd be annoyed, too.

Honestly I would just stop seeing him.

Just end it.

Once upon a time I met a man who, when he stayed over, would help with washing up if I cooked, always offer money for take aways, always bring something and never make a mess. I married him.

People wonder why they end up with piggy men. It’s because the man was clearly a pig and they carried on dating him. He’s pissed off because you aren’t behaving as a servant to him. Is he rich and phenomenal in bed?

Throw this one back. Find another who doesn't bring you down to his level.

No and no to both those questions. Very much the opposite on both

End it.

You were cruel and petty and you'd be a fool to carry on a relationship woth someone who has demonstrated so early on that they don't give a fuck about creating a harmonious household.

Pointless to carry on.

He's not the one for you.

You both sound pretty disrespectful and childish, I would just stop him staying over or better still both admit you're not good for each other.

Just end it. This is early days it should be lovely but you’re both being knobs to each other

How gross that he thinks the bog is an appropriate place to leave his clothes 🤮

this

Is there nowhere else to put his clothes other than on the toilet seat, I've. Never known anyone do that.

Just stop seeing him. Easy problem solved.

He's untidy you aren't. It was mean and disrespectful to stand on his clothes. Good luck with finding somebody who comes up to your expectations. Trained poodle maybe.

Drop him like he’s hot.

A slob who’s shit in bed. Seriously, just WHY?

Ah yes, the usual criticism of OP for fighting back a bit to a man being a lazy slob and expecting her to work around his mess in her house. Why cant you just always rise above and be the bigger person and sit him down and nicely and calmly explain that he's an inconsiderate twat and gently suggest solutions that he already knows but chooses to ignore because he ultimately doesn't give a fuck, OP. How dare you show anything other than serene maturity in the face of twat behaviour! If you give an adult man natural consequences then thats you being petty and mean and thats just as bad as him!!!!!!!!!!

Fucks sake. She's tried asking nicely and he's still ignored her so why shouldn't she drop the rope and let him feel the consequence!
Good on you OP!

That's one perspective I guess, how about he's unable to comply with a reasonable request that even an untrained toddler could manage, no need to call on the poodles

Not sure how this is even a question tbh

He'd been asked not to do it three times but continued. He could have left his clothes in the bedroom. OP is not being unreasonable. She should dump him, he's not going to learn.

Agree its so weird. Does he do that at home too?

Throw him back. Don't become one of those women who's married to a man like this and does nothing but moan about him.

I would have ended it, before doing what you did. I haven't got the patience to deal with a grown man who cannot follow a simple instruction...it would irritate me.

Chuck him back in the sea.

Why are you seeing him then? You find him annoying, you're already bickering and sniping at each other after his first overnight stay and you're not enjoying sex with him.

Honestly, it's almost like half of Mumsnet doesn't seem to understand that relationships are meant to be with people you actually like.

Yeah, you're batshit.

Who actually does that.

I'd end it I think. If he's pissing you off this early on it won't improve.

The only reason I'd see this as in anyway normal is if you haven't told him where you'd like him to leave his clothes. I've never met anyone who treats the toilet like a shelf.