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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Why do British people (at least on MN!) Have such issues with adults celebrating birthdays?

182 replies

BlazesBoylansHat · 18/10/2025 17:36

This has always been really striking to me & I've been on this site on & off for at least 15+ years.

The idea that adults like to celebrate their birthday brings out such negative reactions. I've never understood it!

Is it a cultural thing?

I'm Irish & we generally love to celebrate & speaking for me & my circle, we see the joy in marking these occasions as so many dont get that privilege.

But MN is another world when it comes to this!

Why is that?

OP posts:
pineapplesundae · 20/10/2025 23:02

I don't think it's the celebrating of a birthday that people have a problem with, it's birthday people expectations, e,g., birthday week, month, even year. Someone got upset because sil had an event the week before her birthday, a woman's husband celebrated his birthday for four days and she did most of the work. Go ahead, celebrate your birthday. Just don't make it burdensome for everyone else.

HughGrantsfurrysquirrel · 21/10/2025 01:02

stclementine · 18/10/2025 17:44

God knows. Any excuse to celebrate is my attitude. Life’s hard and stressful, why not take an opportunity to have some fun?

Amen to that. 🎉🎉

ImogenBrocklehurst · 21/10/2025 07:45

Jc2001 · 18/10/2025 17:58

You make a small chicken last a week???. Well hark at you, your majesty

Edited
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Are you new here? 😆

anon666 · 21/10/2025 08:36

I've never noticed this. If anything I feel a bit left out at times as I don't really do much myself with friends....

Dontcallmescarface · 21/10/2025 08:44

Readyforslippers · 19/10/2025 12:25

That's nice. I always find presents between couples a bit strange, even though dh and I do still do it too! When you think about it if you've been married a while the money is both of yours anyway really so it's just like buying it for yourself in a way.

Show quote history

Only if all the money goes into a joint pot. DP (civil partnership), and me only have a joint account for household bills, all other money is kept in our separate accounts, so we use our own money to buy each other gifts.

ObelixtheGaul · 21/10/2025 08:50

pineapplesundae · 20/10/2025 23:02

I don't think it's the celebrating of a birthday that people have a problem with, it's birthday people expectations, e,g., birthday week, month, even year. Someone got upset because sil had an event the week before her birthday, a woman's husband celebrated his birthday for four days and she did most of the work. Go ahead, celebrate your birthday. Just don't make it burdensome for everyone else.

There's definitely been a few birthdayzillas on here. Wasn't there a thread recently where somebody was complaining that despite her partner giving her a lovely meal and presents, she was upset because he didn't post about her birthday on social media?

neighboursmustliveon · 21/10/2025 10:44

I’ve always loved my birthday and make a big deal of it, live celebrating it as much as possible. In my early 20’s I was assured that as I got older that would change and I wouldn’t want to think about it. I turned 47 recently and those people were WRONG! I still love celebrating and already started thinking about my 50th birthday party.

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