Why do British people (at least on MN!) Have such issues with adults celebrating birthdays?

[BlazesBoylansHat]

This has always been really striking to me & I've been on this site on & off for at least 15+ years.

The idea that adults like to celebrate their birthday brings out such negative reactions. I've never understood it!

Is it a cultural thing?

I'm Irish & we generally love to celebrate & speaking for me & my circle, we see the joy in marking these occasions as so many dont get that privilege.

But MN is another world when it comes to this!

Why is that?

And they are still too hot!

I think things have changed since social media came along. A lot of people these days seem to celebrate the opening of a fridge door and plaster it all over Instagram or FB. And some of the celebrations do seem to be pretty performative. If you're talking about a good old fashioned knees up though, count me in.

There are lots of introverts and socially awkward people online I guess. And then there are jealous, bitter and resentful types. Together they feel that nobody should celebrate once they turn 18.

In real life most people I know mark their milestone birthdays in some way or other. It might just be a small meal with family, it might be several small events, or it may be a big party. I have never once heard anybody judge somebody else’s plans. And nobody makes anyone else feel bad for their plans as we can recognise that everybody should celebrate in a way they wish.

Anyway here in my family and friend group we all love big parties. We don’t view them as indulgenr. We see them as fun events where you can catch up with people you haven’t seen for ages, and at our age it is often the only time to have a good dance to great music! Long live birthday parties!

I'm not fussed about birthdays as such, but they are a great excuse to have a party and get people together.

For me it's not celebrating a birthday, but celebrating your good friends and family. The birthday is immaterial really

Yeah, that's how I look at it. Dress up, nice restaurant, friends, family it's great.

I think it’s just on MN; in real life people celebrate things.

I know 😅! There's a cracker on the thread tonight, the heating only comes on when it goes below zero! 🥶

I get sad on my birthday & subconsciously I feel embarrassed asking people to celebrate me. So I don't bother. I love celebrating other people though! And I always make a huge effort to celebrate my DD although her Dad doesn't see the point so often rains on her parade.

Just like 99% of people on mumsnet hate weddings, when I reality I have never met anyone who hates going to a wedding.

Don't feel sad! I think your DD's dad sounds a bit miserable.

It’s a mystery. Birthdays are great. I don’t live in the UK but my employer gives us the day off (paid) on our birthday. If your birthday is a weekend, public holiday, or a day you don’t usually work, you can bank the day to use at some other time. We have a “happy birthday” board on the HR page of the internal website.

He is miserable to be honest - I love celebrating her she's such a great kid & I go all out to make her feel special (not materialistically but balloons/banners/sparkles) I feel sad mainly as I have no parents living anymore & siblings I'm not close to, so there's not really anyone to celebrate with!

I love it! We're not allowed to have the day off (UK public sector), but people always make a fuss and you get a card and cake.

Because it means a day not working and money not being hoarded, which is what life is all about for many posters on here. Thank fuck for the WC because we need people spending money, in this country, for our economy to work.

I don't understand it tbh, why are some people so fucking miserable?
I love my birthday and make a huge deal out of milestone ones so I am a prime example of those who some on here 'cringe' at. Luckily, as my username suggests, I don't give a fuck 🤣

How on earth does OP know everyone's nationality? She/he is Irish so maybe loads of her / his compatriots are the miserable fuckers 🤔

This!!!
We celebrate everything, Autumn, Halloween, Chinese new year, pancake day, Divali, take gifts round to the neighbours for Eid, Footie wins, exam passes, new moons! Friday nights Everything! Life is too short.

I agree with pp, though, I think some people using sites like this maybe quite lonely or isolated.

I agree. It's just mumsnetters
DD and I like to celebrate birthdays. DH not so much, but his is just after Christmas.

Oh, me too. Any excuse 🥳 🎉

This …and most of my mates & family are the same. Love celebrating everyone else but I do cringe at being the centre of attention.

I think it's just a MN thing. I've never come across it anywhere else.

It's just a competitive MN thing. There's a lot of obsession about immaturity, and 'settling down' and 'growing up' and anything that is seen as fun, or frivolous is immediately frowned upon. For me, I shall remain fun, immature and frivolous as long as I can.

I don't mind people celebrating birthdays, especially significant ones. I don't like making a big deal of my birthday though because:

1. I have a massive fear that no one will come to my party and I'll feel pathetic with no friends.
2. Gift giving is definitely not my love language. I don't need random stuff. I don't like the stress of trying to remember other people's birthdays and buying them random stuff.
3. I don't need a reminder that I'm getting older.

Same with weddings on here - I bloody love a wedding and even more so love a child free wedding! Seems like people on here really begrudge getting a wedding invite