To wonder what people actually expect and why they can’t just be happy to live simply?

[Terrazzomazzo]

So many posts on here of people saying that they are running out of money and “I have no fun money” et. Why can’t people just be happy that they have enough to pay their mortgage pay their bills and feed their family and clothe their children? When did holidays , excess “stuff” and weekends of fun days out and take away etc become a given right and expectation?

Yes, maybe not ‘all’, it will depend on where you live (I’m in the Liverpool area ;-)) and how robust a character your own child is. I was also meaning younger female not just kids. My point is that if you walked down a street in 1980 you would not see the fake eyelashes, fake tans, cosmetic fixes etc etc that exist today - were there 80s equivalents? Yes, maybe but I think I would argue that the dial has very much moved on beauty standards to make them the norm and achieving those standards is £££ compared to 1980. Ditto the expectations around outings, activities, holidays etc etc.

Yes it all depends on what value the parents put on those things. Some people place high value on appearance or material things, others don't.
I would never pay for DD to get eyelashes etc because I think they are waste of money.

I’m in Liverpool, like @Ohtheplacesand I agree that it’s very much the norm. My DD was having her brows/nail/lashes done from when she was about 14, and her lips filled from 18. She and her friends buy a new outfit for every single night out (which are frequent). I absolutely despair of it. She spends well over £1000 a month on socialising, clothes and beautifying. This is the generation who can’t afford to save for a house deposit. I’m just hoping that she grows out of it.

I have a niece who spends a fortune on beauty products and cosmetics far in excess of anything I would or could ever pay. She’s 10 years old!

I think there is also an issue with the "boomerang" generation feeling infantilised and ashamed by not being able to afford to get themselves on the property ladder. Phrases like "kiddult" probably feed into that. I imagine that they compensate for the inadequacy by buying other status things like cars etc.

@twistyizzy it’s an interesting point - we have university open day here today at Bath Uni and it’s always mainly well spoken ‘middle class ‘ girls - and of the academic kind and anyone with lashes/spray tans and short dresses would stand out a mile. I’m not judging - just saying that’s how it is - the girls I’m seeing around are mainly trousers/trainers/bit of make up/athletic types.

even in town here generally when we do get hen nights in with the tans/lashes/eyebrows look, they more often than not come from south wales

i just think it’s ’a Look’ in some areas but def not in others. I don’t see it much in London either from people who live there. In fact ‘dressing up’ and a non natural look in general (apart from a dressy ‘event ) seems very ‘out’ in many well heeled areas

@R0ckandHardPlace ah , as per the post I’ve just made, it’s something I’ve seen far more ‘up north’ and in the midlands and wales- and also some less well off places ‘down south’ - the love island look just isn’t a thing as much down here I feel

Like others have said, why should we live simply? We work hard and like to save money to enjoy things. We always do 3 festivals a year, one main holiday and a few long weekends away. Working without those things to look forward to would awful.

um no....unless she is personally an heiress, its her parents who are paying for it

I was chatting with a young lad at a bus stop (not in a weird way - I could be his grandma!) he was about 12 and credit to him had made money by washing cars. When I was 12 I’d have saved it, or bought a record (vinyl). He was going to buy a winter scent/ male after shave at around £100. He’s 12!!! Expectations really have changed

Fun nights out with friends has been a thing since civilisation began. My point was it used to be part of a normal working week,putting on you favourite going out outfit, drinks and whatever else. Fun. Good

Now it's, eyebrows, skincare, hair, nails all outsourced to professionals. Clothes, expensive food/ cocktails and venues. Of course " you don't have to". However you are less likely to feel good about yourself if everyone else in your group looks 10 years younger and is dressed in something current.

Now it's, eyebrows, skincare, hair, nails all outsourced to professionals. Clothes, expensive food/ cocktails and venues

I disagree - most young people I know do not get their skin care done by professionals and my DM went to the hairdresser far more often than I or my DDs do - most YPs seem to buy their clothes on vinted for next to nothing (and then resell them) and look for deals like tgi Friday for drinks. Most will have "pre s" at home before going out and can make one drink last a very long time. My YPs also look for clubs with offers on (eg women get in free before midnight) which then halves the cost for a mixed group as they subsidize the boys. They're also very savvy at using their "expensive tech" (aka their Dads hand me down iphone) to research deals - eg last time DD2 went to the hairdresser it was a £30 deal on a cut colour and blow dry with a supervised trainee in a v swish salon.